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  1. #91
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    Default If you are in a long term relationship

    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    With these stats surely the Mrs would know something's up. No need for your friend to blab.
    He may have had legitimate excuses, like traveling for work.

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    Default If you are in a long term relationship

    Blab.
    This isn't some high school drama. She would be doing it because she thinks its the right thing to do, it's not to get back at him or make the partner feel bad. It's just giving her all the information so she can decide if this is the life she wants or not.

    No one deserves to be cheated on and lied to by a guy they love and trust.

    But we don't know what happens at his house, maybe she does know, maybe she suspects, maybe she is waiting for a bigger sign before moving out, maybe she won't even care because she wants to keep the family together for the kids?

    Whatever the outcome I still think she has a right to know, Facebook may not be the best way, but its the only way my friend has if she chooses to tell.

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    Default If you are in a long term relationship

    Another question

    If you said yes you would want to know.

    Would you still want to know if he left?

    He keeps saying he will leave her, so if he left would you still want to know he cheated?

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    Default Re: If you are in a long term relationship

    He seems like a total **** of a bloke and doesn't deserve a girl friend.
    As much as it will hurt her she needs to know how much of a low scam bag he really is!!!!
    If he can cheat once, he can cheat a thousand times. So this probably isn't the first and won't be the last.

    Is there anyway she can get her number to call or text her? Or maybe your friend could even fb the lady her number.
    I probably wouldn't want to do it face to face just in case she lashes out. (I know if a lady walked up to me and said I've been sleeping with your partner for months I'd want to punch her in the face out of Anger!)

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    I would want to know more if he left ... so that I wouldn't be always wondering.

    It would only be if we were staying together that perhaps ignorance might be bliss (but this is more for the one-off trangression).

  7. #96
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    Default If you are in a long term relationship

    Yes, I would want to know everything. It would help me to understand.

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    I would want to know. If Facebook is the only way to contact his partner then so be it. As long as it can be seen your friend is doing it in a non vindictive way then I think it's fine for her to tell. I feel for your friend as well. She has also been deceived. He's a jerk!

    Just wondering, people are saying he should tell his partner. While this is true are we missing the point that he CHEATED and is quiet capable/willing to lie?

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    Default Re: If you are in a long term relationship

    I would want to know

    I would have a right to know

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    Default If you are in a long term relationship

    Quote Originally Posted by River Song View Post
    I would send a letter over a fb message though if she has their address and address it to the wife.
    Yep send a letter addressed to the wife.
    It's more anonymous that way too.
    My mother found out about dad via a message left for her at work.
    In the end mum didn't care how she found out all she cared about was that her husband had cheated.

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    Default If you are in a long term relationship

    Quote Originally Posted by shhhsleeping View Post
    Another question

    If you said yes you would want to know.

    Would you still want to know if he left?

    He keeps saying he will leave her, so if he left would you still want to know he cheated?
    I'm just going to be very honest here.

    If I had wasted any part of my life with some meaningless pore excuse of a person who doesn't possess enough respect to have had the decency to tell me about their deception, I would want to know even more so I didn't spend one moment blaming my self about the break up.
    I would want to know what my Ex and father of our children was a really like.
    To leave a partner for with no real reason, or some fake a** excuse so she/he can blame them selves is just a cruel act.

    I really hate cheating, especially when the cheater tells the "other person" they are going to leave their spouse for them, how selfish.
    The unfaithful spouse isn't happy but decides to go out and get another partner so that when he/she leaves they don't have to be single? What is the whole notion behind it, intense fear of being alone? A deeper inner issue of needing to feel wanted? Sever commitment and self esteem issues?
    For gods sake he had a "Back up" for when he finally got the balls to tell his wife he wanted out.
    One things for sure and that's I wouldn't want to spend another moment in doubt over why my family fell apart, that's why I would want to know.
    Anyone who finds it acceptable to treat another person in such way is someone who I have very little respect for.

    He is a selfish person for starting up a relationship with your friend whilst he had a family.
    He is disgusting for not being more considerate of his wife, it's extremely deceitful.
    He is not what I would call a reliable father, his wife is at home looking after his children whilst he has sex with another woman, potentially exposing her to diseases that could effect her life as an individual and as a mother and missing out on time with his children for the person getting the best of him.
    Nothing is right about it. I wouldn't care if my husband had left 20 years ago I would still like to know how he spent his time whilst I still had love and commitment for him.
    I want to know when someone breaks my trust.

    If he wasn't happy, he should have told his wife not cheated.
    Your friend knew he was in a relationship with someone and had kids, at some point she would of had to face the reality there was a very good chance the wife would find out, essentially she was knowingly sleeping with another woman's partner and I think your friend should tell her. (Not blaming your friend for any of this, but she would have known things could go bad, Im glad to see she was able to see the wrong in it and left)

    Either way no matter which way it all ends the innocent one gets left with a shattered life.
    She has ever right to know all the reasons why her life is being ripped out from underneath her.

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