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  1. #1
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    Default Am I holding her back??

    Ok this is an irrational rant. I warned you.

    DD is 17mo and I'm worried that I'm not doing everything I should be doing to help her development. I wonder if I treat her too much like a baby and get used to doing things a certain way because it's working at the time when I should be moving on??

    A few things are:

    Speech - this is my biggest concern at the moment. She doesn't have many words, the only really clear ones are mummy/mum, daddy, bye. I think she's saying "shoes" and "what's that?" because she uses what sounds like these when putting on her shoes or pointing at something. I think she might have said "yeah" a few times in the last few days. Her comprehension is good, she follows directions and understands a lot of words like if I ask for a specific book that shes familiar with she'll go get it or will go to the fridge if I say yoghurt.

    Sleep - she sleeps with a dummy (usually spits it out once asleep) and in a sleeping bag. Should I be ditching the dummy and getting her used to sleeping with sheets rather than the sleeping bag?? They've moved her from cot to little trundle bed thingy at daycare and she sleeps fine - should I convert her cot at home??

    Eating - I saw an 18mo on super nanny eating competently with cutlery! DD just stabs at her food then shoves it in her mouth with her hands.

    Clingy - she takes ages to get comfortable with people, when we go out she clings to me for ages like she's scared I'm going to leave her! She's fine at day care though as she loves her carers. I try to encourage her etc but no idea what else to do??

    There are other things but those are the main ones that my irrational brain is mulling over.

    Any advice is welcome

  2. #2
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    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
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    Default Am I holding her back??

    My advice for the most of it is to stop comparing your daughter to other children! You read her books and talk to her, don't worry about her speech too much if you have concerns talk to the staff at day care

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    Default Am I holding her back??

    She sounds like a perfectly normal 17/18 month old to me (at least she sounds exactly like my dd was at that age) we didn't move her from the cot til she was about 2.5, didn't use her cutlery properly til about 3, dummy til nearly 3 but everyone who meets her says how beautiful she is in nature and how clever she is (almost 4 now) Big hugs xoxox the fact that you are worrying says to me that you love your daughter very much and you will do great at encouraging her when needed

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    Default Am I holding her back??

    She sounds like a thriving toddler to me
    Do what works for you.

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    Default Am I holding her back??

    She sounds absolutely perfect.
    Don't worry about her speech.
    Leave her in her cot if your both happy.
    At least she's eating! Fantastic!
    Sleeping bags are fine if you feel she won't "trip" if she tries to stand.
    Dummies are up to you.... Is she just having it for sleep?
    Clingy is normal. Good days/bad days she'll get better as she gets older. It's great she's happy at daycare.

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    Parenting is different for everyone. Seriously if it works go with it. I would not worry about what you are doing.
    If your concerned about speech maybe talk to your MCHN. If she had no words I would be worried but she is talking so dont stress too much. Your doing a good job.

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    Default Am I holding her back??

    Quote Originally Posted by headoverfeet View Post
    My advice for the most of it is to stop comparing your daughter to other children! You read her books and talk to her, don't worry about her speech too much if you have concerns talk to the staff at day care
    Yeah I know, you're totally right and I say the same to other people, but it's so hard not to look at other kids and worry!

    I asked the staff at DC and they said given that DD seems to understand most of their instructions, babbles heaps and engages in other ways I shouldn't really worry - easier said than done!

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    Default Am I holding her back??

    Quote Originally Posted by faroutbrusselsprout View Post
    She sounds absolutely perfect.
    Don't worry about her speech.
    Leave her in her cot if your both happy.
    At least she's eating! Fantastic!
    Sleeping bags are fine if you feel she won't "trip" if she tries to stand.
    Dummies are up to you.... Is she just having it for sleep?
    Clingy is normal. Good days/bad days she'll get better as she gets older. It's great she's happy at daycare.
    She's a great eater now, which is awesome because she was a failure to thrive baby and really struggled with intolerances and weight. Thankfully I no longer stress about her food intake or weight as she's very healthy (and CMPI free!) now.

    Dummy is just for sleep, we never used it for anything else and only introduced it due to her severe reflux. Sleep is definitely something we don't like messing with as it took so long for her to sleep well. She can stand and walk around her cot in her sleeping bag and on hot nights she sleeps without it. She doesn't use it at DC.

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    Firstly - stop watching Supernanny! Or else view it as simple entertainment and take what they show you in the video clips with a grain of salt. Its perfectly normal for an 18mth old to stab at food.

    Secondly, don't do anything you're not comfortable with just because you think you 'should'. If its working for you, then stick with it eg dummy, sleeping bags etc. There'll come a time when its clear its no longer working, or no longer a good idea and then it will feel right to change.

    You've put in so much effort with the intolerances, reflux, sleep that I think you should stop, relax, and feel proud for a bit. You're certainly not holding her back, from what I've read (I've followed a few of your threads) quite the opposite.

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    Default Am I holding her back??

    Quote Originally Posted by MissMuppet View Post
    Firstly - stop watching Supernanny! Or else view it as simple entertainment and take what they show you in the video clips with a grain of salt. Its perfectly normal for an 18mth old to stab at food.

    Secondly, don't do anything you're not comfortable with just because you think you 'should'. If its working for you, then stick with it eg dummy, sleeping bags etc. There'll come a time when its clear its no longer working, or no longer a good idea and then it will feel right to change.

    You've put in so much effort with the intolerances, reflux, sleep that I think you should stop, relax, and feel proud for a bit. You're certainly not holding her back, from what I've read (I've followed a few of your threads) quite the opposite.
    Oh thanks I'm always surprised when someone remembers my threads! Yes I think you're right, I just need to trust my instincts a bit more and also trust DD to let me know when she needs a change. I think I am relaxing a bit more, now that she's much healthier and happier I know we've done well so far - I think I just have high expectations of myself!

    Thanks everyone, I feel a little better now. DD is just such an awesome little kid I want to get it right for her! I suppose it's pretty normal to doubt ourselves over these things.


 

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