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  1. #1
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    Default Worried how my 3yo step daughter will go...

    After reading a thread about the 3yo acting up, I suddenly have a huge worry. I'm due in just over 5 weeks and I'm worried how my step daughter is going to react to a new brother or sister at her dads place. She has a younger brother and sister at her mums, but hasn't really been around me throughout my pregnancy. This is due to the fact that I have been living in a different state. My DP and I had planned to have this baby in Perth because he was moving back here from Darwin as is his ex. I have only seen my DSD a few times during the pregnancy, as I flew up there for her birthday. She hasn't seen my belly grow (not that I'm huge or anything) or had any chance to bond with this baby whilst its in the womb. Unless I go into labour prematurely, my DSD will only see me pregnant once more. My DP and I have decided that she will be the first visitor after bub is born. I'm just worried that she will go from being a perfect (well almost lol) little angel to being how she is at her mothers (a little trouble maker). Any advice?

    Oh and sorry about rambling a lot. Lol

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  2. #2
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    Default Re: Worried how my 3yo step daughter will go...

    Bump
    Anyone?

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    Default Worried how my 3yo step daughter will go...

    Do you have a good relationship with her mother? If so, could you skype say once a week and show her your belly, explain about the baby? Or perhaps send emails/letters with photos and get her mum to read them to her and explain? Maybe send her a 'big sister preparation pack', with a book on babies (ESP if you can find one dealing with big sister/step sibling situation) baby doll to take care of etc...

    Failing that, I've seen good success rates with integrating the new arrival and step-siblings by getting them involved with baby - helping to change, pick out clothes, make artwork to hang on the baby's wall, etc. And tell the step-sibling constantly how much their new baby sister/brother loves them. Also spending one on one time alone with the step-sibling helps them feel like they're still important.

    We have quite a few step-siblings situations throughout my family and these things have always worked quite well. My nephew has a baby step-sister and absolutely adores her...he always tells her that he had the best sister in the world!

    So long as she still feels valued and important, things should go fine.

    Best of luck!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Worried how my 3yo step daughter will go...

    Whilst at her dads, the only step is me. I am her step mum. This will be her brother or sister. I don't get along that great with her mum (very sticky situation) and DP hasn't skyped because he doesn't want to talk to her. He misses his daughter, but doesn't want to have to be sociable with his ex. Its a difficult situation, made even worse by the fact that we are all very young still. DP is only 27, his ex is 24 and I'm 23. I'm just wondering if the one visit when she gets down here will be enough? And what's the best way for them to meet to cause the least amount of problems...

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    She will be fine, just make sure she still gets plenty of attention from her dad and involve her in caring for the baby a bit, she can pass you a nappy etc etc.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Worried how my 3yo step daughter will go...

    She will be getting plenty of attention from her dad. I'll make sure of it. And I'll try spend some time with her too when bub is asleep...

    What's the best way to introduce them?

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