+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 28
  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Posts
    239
    Thanks
    14
    Thanked
    76
    Reviews
    0

    Default Did I do the wrong thing?

    We had friends over for new year for a BBQ. Whilst the boys were in the shed looking at their remote control cars the ladies sat outside watching children. In the pool (older children 7 yrs +). Conversation started amongst the girls and not long into the convo, another wife questioned wether the boys had started drinking. I said yeah, probably, as normal cause they hangout after work most days and have a beer. This wife knows they do this, but one of the other g/Fs (who I had meet twice before in social outings not in relaxed home setting tho) questioned that they did it every day. I said yes, but it's no big issue for me as its not excessive and it's his relax time. Everyone is usually gone by 7pm and that's when we have dinner etc.
    She said. I knew he was lieing to me, he finishes at 4 but is never home till 7 and tells me he is working late. Whilst boys start cooking BBQ, she informs him that she knows he been lieing about finishing work late. etc. Privately.
    Friend tells dp that I told gf and that what was my problem? Like i knew he didnt tell her, My dp said go ask her ur self I know nothing. He didn't ask me, and they left.
    I feel guilty that I may have caused an argument on nye? But not for telling her as he's the one lieing to her and I believe honesty is best. Am I wrong tho? But how am I supposed to chat to her if I dont know what he tells her?

    Does that all make sense? I hope so.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    8,546
    Thanks
    919
    Thanked
    1,250
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    You didn't do anything wrong, he's a d1ck! It's not your job to lie for him.

  3. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Mathermy For This Useful Post:

    Eko  (05-01-2013),ermergerd  (05-01-2013),FindMyLunch  (05-01-2013),LoveLivesHere  (05-01-2013),Mod-xkwzit  (05-01-2013),TiffanyBlue  (07-02-2013)

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    5,408
    Thanks
    181
    Thanked
    704
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts

    Default Did I do the wrong thing?

    How were you to know? The guys fault for lying about. Let your partner and he can pass the message along.

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    593
    Thanks
    101
    Thanked
    239
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Re: Did I do the wrong thing?

    Its not your fault that he lies to her. He was bound to be found out eventually so don't sweat it.
    I would still talk to her and be mysef. She may question you about other things but he is not your responsibility so I would just tell the truth.

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub

  6. #5
    SpecialPatrolGroup's Avatar
    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    In the messy house, Brisbane
    Posts
    9,481
    Thanks
    2,180
    Thanked
    5,405
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    So his dishonesty is your problem? I think not. If you didn't know it was a big secret, how did you know to keep said secret. Not your fault, they clearly have other relationship issues around why he feels the need to lie to her.

  7. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to SpecialPatrolGroup For This Useful Post:

    Mod-xkwzit  (05-01-2013),PurpleButterfly4  (05-01-2013)

  8. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    1,094
    Thanks
    557
    Thanked
    243
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Did I do the wrong thing?

    If no one said 'oh btw don't tell so and so's gf that he is here drinking every afternoon' how were you to know?! even so I wouldn't lie if asked about something like that (maybe id be a bit vague, or tell her to ask him)

    Not your problem, you have done nothing wrong, if he is lying to her that's his issue to deal with, it's unfortunate but the messenger is always going to get shot! In my experience of course! I hope it doesn't damage the relationship...

  9. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    NSW
    Posts
    1,932
    Thanks
    1,440
    Thanked
    585
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Re: Did I do the wrong thing?

    I don't think you did the wrong thing, how were you to know he hasn't been honest with her about what time he finishes work and where he goes afterwards. He's probably just annoyed that she found out.

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub

  10. #8
    αληθη's Avatar
    αληθη is offline BH name read as Aleethee
    Winner 2012 - One most likely to be hacked by Nomsie
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Posts
    2,961
    Thanks
    3,031
    Thanked
    805
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts

    Default Did I do the wrong thing?

    How could you have done the wrong thing if you didn't know he was lying. I would've done the same.

  11. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    7,668
    Thanks
    5,719
    Thanked
    3,068
    Reviews
    25
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week

    Default Re: Did I do the wrong thing?

    Sounds like he is looking for somebody to blame for being caught out in a lie. In the end he lied and you werent to know. I dont think you did anything wrong

  12. #10
    bunkx's Avatar
    bunkx is offline Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    The Hills WA
    Posts
    6,575
    Thanks
    565
    Thanked
    1,252
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts

    Default Did I do the wrong thing?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mathermy View Post
    You didn't do anything wrong, he's a d1ck! It's not your job to lie for him.
    this


 

Similar Threads

  1. what is best to do in this situation??? am i doing the wrong thing?
    By MonkeySeeMonkeyDo in forum General Chat
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 15-06-2012, 15:49

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Springfree Trampoline
Give the Ultimate Christmas Gift Springfree Trampoline
The World's Safest Trampoline™ is now also the world's first Smart Trampoline™. Sensors on the mat detect your every move and your jumps control fun, educational and active games on tablet. Secure the Ultimate Christmas Gift today!
sales & new stuffsee all
Wendys Music School Melbourne
Wondering about Music Lessons? FREE 30 minute ASSESSMENT. Find out if your child is ready! Piano from age 3 years & Guitar, Singing, Drums, Violin from age 5. Lessons available for all ages. 35+ years experience. Structured program.
Use referral 'bubhub' when booking
featured supporter
ProSwim
ProSwim Rostrevor runs learn to swim classes for children and adults. Lessons are run during the Summer months (Oct-Mar). Our indoor centre at Plympton Park has lessons all year round, including school holidays.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!