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  1. #51
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    Default Re: Partner in Custody.

    Quote Originally Posted by HugsBunny View Post
    I would be going to court to hear the charges. If my son had been arrested and I didn't know why, I would be going to court to hear the charges.

    From what you've said op, if you were to just wait for the word you'll be waiting a long time seeing as how DP won't tell you the charges, his mum isn't going and you're not going to court
    ^This exactly!

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    I'm a bit confused why neither you or his mum are not going to hear the charges??? Doesn't anybody want to know? At least then you can plan ahead.

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    Default Partner in Custody.

    Sorry but this makes it sound like his mum already knows the chargers and didn't want you to know what they are.
    If I was you I would be going and hearing it for yourself a also if he has gotten legal rep you might be able to talk to them

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  6. #54
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    HugsBunny is offline Once upon a time there was a bunny.........
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    Default Partner in Custody.

    Quote Originally Posted by wantmore View Post
    Sorry but this makes it sound like his mum already knows the chargers and didn't want you to know what they are.
    My thoughts exactly

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    Default Re: Partner in Custody.

    Quote Originally Posted by InNeedOfWisdom View Post
    DP's mum is only going to drop off clothes this morning, shes not going to the hearing. Nor am I. I cant find anything on any court lists grrrr.
    Dps mum was just here to pick up some things, shes feeling as hopless and helpless as i am.

    BUT, i had a lot of time to think last night while i didnt sleep, and ive come up with a conclusion: What will be will be. No point me freaking out about things I cant control, so i'll just wait, fill my hours with productivity and wait for the word.
    I'm confused about why dp didn't tell you the charges when you spoke on the phone and neither your or his mother want to go to court so you can atleast gain some knowledge as to why the man that you chose to be in a relationship with is being extradited for , possibly, serious charges

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  9. #56
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    Default Partner in Custody.

    Quote Originally Posted by InNeedOfWisdom View Post
    DP's mum is only going to drop off clothes this morning, shes not going to the hearing. Nor am I. I cant find anything on any court lists grrrr.
    Dps mum was just here to pick up some things, shes feeling as hopless and helpless as i am.

    BUT, i had a lot of time to think last night while i didnt sleep, and ive come up with a conclusion: What will be will be. No point me freaking out about things I cant control, so i'll just wait, fill my hours with productivity and wait for the word.
    I really think you should go to court. This is jmo, of course, but you need to know what the charges are.
    As I said before, they only extradite for serious outstanding warrants/offences in Australia. They didn't just stumble across your partner, they came to his home specifically to arrest him. This means the two states were communicating/working together to detain him. That doesn't mean he is guilty by any means, but it does mean the police have some serious reasons to suspect him of whatever it is. I really think you need to find out what the charges are to be able to decide what to do from here and how best to help him (if that's what you want to do).
    I could be very blunt and speculate on what type of crime he is accused of but I am sure each scenario has already played through your mind. The thing is, these wont stop rolling through your mind until you know for sure what the charges are.

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    Sorry hun but this is sounding very weird. It sounds as though the mother knows what the charges are and isn't telling you. Im sure most mothers would be running to court to find out what their child is charged with. The fact the your partner wont tell you the charges is ringing huge alarm bells for me. Nothing is heard in court on the weekend unless its very serious.

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    Default Partner in Custody.

    I can't understand why his mum is not going to court to support her son and find out what's going on.
    Unless she knows what's going on.
    I would be going to court and finding out what the charges are. You owe it to yourself to know, he can tell you whatever he likes 4 mths is not a long time. I put on a 'face' for at least 6mths into a relationship and I'm pretty sure most people do.
    Keep your eyes and ears open. I hope it's all a misunderstanding for your sake.

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    Default Re: Partner in Custody.

    I know someone that was falsely accused of abusing a child.

    He was that embarrassed/scared of judgement that he didn't even want to tell his own family. He truly thought he'd never get to see his grand kids over this!

    He had to go to court, spent thousands on legal fees, faced the prospect of jail. All because of some silly little story.

    It took about a year before the prosecution dropped the case. That's the worst thing. They didn't even find him not guilty etc. they saw the evidence and decided to drop the case. It was obvious the boy was lying. He'll still have that hanging around.

    So yeah, long sorry short, accusation doesn't mean guilt either.

    Spent from my dome. Excuse autocorrect

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    I hope one of the scenarios you are playing out in your head is cutting your losses and saying goodbye to this guy. Surely these charges must be pretty serious for him to be extradited, and for him not to tell you what they are! That's IF he is found to be guilty anyway.
    4 months isn't a long time, he could have all kinds of secrets lurking, I mean if you has done a terrible law breaking thing you'd probably not want to scare off a new partner by divulging that info.
    And 4 months is still so new so.... if you need to cut your losses then at least it hasn't been long term with kids heavily attached etc.

    Sorry I know that's blunt, but true.

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