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  1. #11
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    Default Newborn question - during hospital stay. Sensitive question about SIDS

    We have a snuza monitor. It's a little clip you put on bubs nappy and it will vibrate/alarm if bub stops breathing. We took it with us to hospital (our bub has a heart condition) because we were worried about her when she left NICU to come back to the room. Funnily enough, we didn't use it. Her little noises and wiggles were enough.
    But if you wanted a monitor that is simple and easy, you could get a snuza halo.
    So sorry to hear about your first bub. Hugs.

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  3. #12
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    Thank you mim1. That sounds like a brilliant idea. When my little girl passed it was in a split second and we were at the hospital at the time standing right next to her, i was actually doing up her pants at the time. If they couldnt resuscitate her within seconds of her not breathing then I wouldnt have a hope to do it. I will definitely ask about the 'boarding' option and I'm researching monitors at the moment. Most of them appear to have a 20sec delay before they alarm though so thats a bit too long. I'd like to get it all sorted out before we get to the hospital but we're 5 hours away from the hospital I'll be delivering at so really the first time I'll see the midwives will be on admission.

    Quote Originally Posted by mim1 View Post
    I'm so sorry for your loss.

    My ds was in Special care from birth, so I wasn't quite sure what to expect when dd came along either.

    Honestly my dd slept very little during the night so it wasn't an issue. My dd was phlegmy on her first night and when the midwife settled me into my room (at 1am-ish) my dd coughed up some mucus so the midwife suggested she go down to special care so the midwives could watch her & I could sleep. I was reluctant to let her go anywhere as having my ds in special care and not in my room was hard emotionally. BUT, it was only for a few hours and we both got much needed rest. On the other nights I slept very little as my dd fed a lot and was irritable a lot too. I let the midwives take her to special care (as a 'boarder') so I could get a bit of sleep too. It's pretty common for that to be an option in private hospitals.

    I'd definitely chat with your Ob/midwife before hand and on the ward and I'm sure they'll help you watch bubs.

  4. #13
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    Default Newborn question - during hospital stay. Sensitive question about SIDS

    Quote Originally Posted by ChangedMyMind View Post
    Thank you mim1. That sounds like a brilliant idea. When my little girl passed it was in a split second and we were at the hospital at the time standing right next to her, i was actually doing up her pants at the time. If they couldnt resuscitate her within seconds of her not breathing then I wouldnt have a hope to do it. I will definitely ask about the 'boarding' option and I'm researching monitors at the moment. Most of them appear to have a 20sec delay before they alarm though so thats a bit too long. I'd like to get it all sorted out before we get to the hospital but we're 5 hours away from the hospital I'll be delivering at so really the first time I'll see the midwives will be on admission.
    That's heartbreaking, so sorry for your loss. Can't even begin to imagine what that would feel like.

    I can appreciate it would be incredibly difficult to do, but try your best not to stress too much about your next bub, otherwise you could make yourself one sick mummy. It does sound as though your poor DD had a condition that not even a monitor would have helped in that situation anyway, if she passed so quickly? I'm all for extra monitoring if that will help you feel better though, absolutely.

    Have a chat to your OB and/or the head midwife/nurse over the phone and ask them to put detailed notes in your file perhaps? That way it won't matter who is on duty that night, they will be aware of your circumstances hopefully.

    I wish you all the very best with this baby

  5. #14
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    Default Newborn question - during hospital stay. Sensitive question about SIDS

    Hi, I have been thinking about your post for days. Your story has really affected me. I deeply feel your concern about SIDS, cos it is always on my mind as well. I hope you don't mind what I'm about to write. I feel concerned for your well being after you come home, as you write 'who is going to watch to make sure the baby is breathing?' Are you imagining watching your baby sleep? If so, when will you rest yourself? Sleep deprivation can take a huge toll mentally. I hope you take care of yourself. Follow the recommended guidelines and this will give your LO the best chance, and remember the odds are super low. I know odds may not have comforted you in the past, but I read somewhere that our babies are ten times more likely to date a millionaire than die of SIDS!

    Hugs to you.

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    LifeInShadesOfGrey is offline Just a little bit silly :)
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    Default Newborn question - during hospital stay. Sensitive question about SIDS

    I'm sorry for your loss I agree about talking to the midwives. I found I always stirred or just woke up. One thing I like to do is set an alarm periodically. It would wake me up. I would check and then go back to sleep.

    DD had some issues of stopping breathing when she was younger for extended periods so I used to worry a lot.

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    Default Re: Newborn question - during hospital stay. Sensitive question about SIDS

    Quote Originally Posted by SpecialPatrolGroup View Post
    There are no monitors unless medically indicated. Really, you just trust that they do what they are made to do. (plus newbies snuffle and grunt and gurgle which while noisy, is very comforting to hear)

    ETA sorry, submitted too soon....meant to say to talk to the midwives about your previous loss, they might be able to support you in checking more often while you sleep and counsell you in the anxiety you will naturally feel.
    ^^this.
    I haven't experienced the horrible tragedy of losing a baby but i did suffer anxiety after losing a loved one suddenly that really affected my parenting. I had to relearn how to relate to risk and know that even though i had experienced that awful 1 in a million horror, that usually it will be fine. I am still overprotective! But i can also let my kids do regular things and have ways to manage my anxiety.



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    Default Newborn question - during hospital stay. Sensitive question about SIDS

    Hi op
    Couldn't read and run, firstly congratulations on your pregnancy and secondly as pp have said they don't use monitoring routinely on term healthy bubs but I like the special care suggestion so you can get some rest the first night very important. I understand your concerns my first bub was a NICU bub after being born at 32 weeks and has special needs and many ongoing medical issues so when I had number two I was petrified if this and to make mattes worse she was quite gurgly initially and coughing up mucus but I found I didn't need a monitor as she made heaps of noises that woke me straight away. If you find you want an apnea monitor the baby sense (by hisense) monitor is the best option (I researched them a lot it does have a 20 second lag but they mostly all do I'm also an ICU nurse and this is the standard that us used in hospitals) also this monitor has pads that go under the mattress so there's no risk of an electrode lifting off the bubs skin like some of the other monitors. It will also beep if bubs takes 10 or less breaths in a minute which can be a precursor to bubs stopping breathing. Our lil one is also sleeping in our room still at nearly 3 months old. The anxiety never goes away (I have witnessed my first one stop breathing multiple times during seizures and illness almost requiring CPR so I can relate) but having number two has been very healing for us I hope you have a similar experience too

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    Nope they just seem to expect that every mother is totally cool with having no monitor on their baby.

    I'm not.

    I too lost a child (he was stillborn at 39wks) and I'm not prepared to have another funeral for one of my children. I'll do anything in my power To keep them safe & alive so I took my own.

    Watch out though because I had a pediatrician tell me when my son was admitted at 6 months old that me wanting a breathing monitor on him was crazy and I needed to see a psychiatrist forced me to go to my doctor to get a treatment plan for my craziness and my doctor laughed and said you dont need one & that she could understand why I wanted it on.

    Good luck

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  11. #19
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    Thank you Mrs Whitehouse. I'm sorry that we share this experience but its comforting to know that someone understands why I feel like this. If I thought it was necessary I would stay up all night to watch him, while not a practical solution there are ways around it even if I have to hire a night nanny.

    I have seen a counsellor under the advice of my midwife and I thought it wouldnt be a bad idea but I'd give it a go. Even the counsellor said "I dont think you really need me" and my GP thought it unnecessary when I asked for the referral. Not because they're cold unfeeling people but because he thought I was dealing with it appropriately.
    We will definitely be getting a monitor of some sort because I might be able to handle it the first time but twice would be too much for anyone to bear so like you I'll do whatever it takes regardless of what any nurse or doctor thinks. Thank you so much Mrs Whitehouse.

    Quote Originally Posted by mrswhitehouse View Post
    Nope they just seem to expect that every mother is totally cool with having no monitor on their baby.

    I'm not.

    I too lost a child (he was stillborn at 39wks) and I'm not prepared to have another funeral for one of my children. I'll do anything in my power To keep them safe & alive so I took my own.

    Watch out though because I had a pediatrician tell me when my son was admitted at 6 months old that me wanting a breathing monitor on him was crazy and I needed to see a psychiatrist forced me to go to my doctor to get a treatment plan for my craziness and my doctor laughed and said you dont need one & that she could understand why I wanted it on.

    Good luck


 

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