Closed Thread
Page 5 of 15 FirstFirst ... 34567 ... LastLast
Results 41 to 50 of 142
  1. #41
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    3,708
    Thanks
    893
    Thanked
    2,784
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts

    Default relationship issues - 30 weeks preg

    Quote Originally Posted by FirstTimeMummy2012 View Post
    I just think that a very large majority of men (yes I'm generalising) like to look at p o r n. Trying to stop them is like putting a bowl of candy in front of a child and saying, "Don't touch!"
    I disagree - men are not children and to compare them to children is rather belittling and condescending. I expect my husband to exert self control. I don't expect that of my 2 year old son.

    In response to the OP, if it makes you feel crap you need to tell him. It wouldn't bother me I don't think but it's never been something I've had to deal with. I do however agree that him watching it doesn't necessarily equate to not finding you desirable or attractive.

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to Moxy For This Useful Post:

    SoThisIsLove  (14-12-2012)

  3. #42
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    1,379
    Thanks
    40
    Thanked
    637
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default relationship issues - 30 weeks preg

    I agree with ftm and Alicia.

    Tbh I think there are a lot of women out there who believe their dh's don't watch p orn, when they actually do. Many men are embarrassed to admit it and if their wives have already gone in about how disgusting it is etc etc they are hardly going to say 'actually I watch it'. My dh included. His ex wife was like that so he hid his p orn watching and denied it if she asked.

  4. #43
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    19,776
    Thanks
    5,212
    Thanked
    7,063
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    The OP said she feels hurt. It's not ok to dismiss her feelings. Does my DP watch pron? Yes. Do I mind? No.

    Does this mean that I have a right to dismiss the OP, and be completely unhelpful and tell her she's overreacting by having her own *feelings? NO!

  5. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Benji For This Useful Post:

    delirium  (14-12-2012),Eko  (14-12-2012),peanutmonkey  (14-12-2012),RobinSparkles  (14-12-2012)

  6. #44
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Outer North Melbourne
    Posts
    1,857
    Thanks
    435
    Thanked
    340
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default relationship issues - 30 weeks preg

    I hate that these threads always turn into a 'the p o r n industry is horrific' type threads as soon as someone says 'p o r n'.
    What about amateur p o r n? people that choose to video themselves and share it in the Internet? you can't just say the p o r n is not ok as it degrades woman etc etc as a generslised statement and then get ****ty at others who say 'all men like p o r n' because they are making a generalised statement.
    I was never sure how I felt about p o r n in the early days although DH was open and honest with me (as in I knew he watched it not as "hey honey I'm off to watch some p o r n and have a pull"). DH downloaded me some different types of p o r n and I found what made me feel comfortable, aroused etc and what I didn't like. DH and I chatted about it.
    Op perhaps if your DH is downloading A*al p o r n then he is trying to enjoy a fantasy that he knows will not become a reality and doesn't want to talk to you about it of he knows its a taboo thing. different people have different fantasies but it one partner feels something is taboo then it can make the other partner feel dirty/wrong for thinking about it.
    I think it would be wise to have an open mind and chat to your DH about what he finds arousing about what he is watching and understand his feelings. Obviously you need to express your feelings to him to but I think the snap reaction woman sometimes have to their partner watching p o r n can quickly become all about how the woman feels when there are two people involved.
    Last edited by Mod-RaryGirl; 14-12-2012 at 13:12. Reason: trying to prevent the p o r n spammers

  7. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to jez For This Useful Post:

    Cleigh  (14-12-2012),FirstTimeMummy2012  (14-12-2012),Slyph  (16-02-2013)

  8. #45
    Mod-RaryGirl's Avatar
    Mod-RaryGirl is offline Forum Manager
    Winner 2013 - Best Avatar
    << Awesome avatar by Best Things!
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    In paradise
    Posts
    20,311
    Thanks
    1,079
    Thanked
    3,276
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I just want remind everyone that posts are googable (is that a word ) ... anyway, whenever we've had discussions on topics like this in the past we have been inundated with inappropriate images/spam over the next few days.

    To try and prevent this if we change words that these spammers may google ... use pron or p o r n (add the spaces) or put a * in eg: an*l etc to try and prevent the undesirable spam. Anything you think these spammers may google to attract them to our site please just change it around a little.

    Thanks ladies.

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to Mod-RaryGirl For This Useful Post:

    jez  (14-12-2012)

  10. #46
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Posts
    191
    Thanks
    174
    Thanked
    37
    Reviews
    0

    Default Re: relationship issues - 30 weeks preg

    Quote Originally Posted by 4underfour View Post
    I agree with ftm and Alicia.

    Tbh I think there are a lot of women out there who believe their dh's don't watch p orn, when they actually do. Many men are embarrassed to admit it and if their wives have already gone in about how disgusting it is etc etc they are hardly going to say 'actually I watch it'. My dh included. His ex wife was like that so he hid his p orn watching and denied it if she asked.
    Thank you!!
    Finally someone else who is actually REALISTIC!!

    Sent from my GT-I9300T using BubHub

  11. #47
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    6,311
    Thanks
    2,387
    Thanked
    4,599
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts

    Default relationship issues - 30 weeks preg

    I guess some men are just more evolved than others.

  12. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to NancyBlackett For This Useful Post:

    babyla  (14-12-2012),peanutmonkey  (14-12-2012),Purple Lily  (14-12-2012),RobinSparkles  (14-12-2012)

  13. #48
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    3,708
    Thanks
    893
    Thanked
    2,784
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts

    Default relationship issues - 30 weeks preg

    ...
    Last edited by Moxy; 14-12-2012 at 13:27.

  14. #49
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Sautéed with bacon
    Posts
    6,070
    Thanks
    271
    Thanked
    2,695
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts

    Default relationship issues - 30 weeks preg

    Quote Originally Posted by Alicia92 View Post
    Thank you!!
    Finally someone else who is actually REALISTIC!!

    Sent from my GT-I9300T using BubHub
    My reality involves me believing my husband...??
    Pretty realistic in my books.
    Lying is a deal breaker in our relationship. He'd have to be an idiot to lie about watching p0rn to get a cheap w@nk.

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to faroutbrusselsprout For This Useful Post:

    Purple Lily  (14-12-2012)

  16. #50
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    7,053
    Thanks
    6,263
    Thanked
    5,481
    Reviews
    4
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a weekBusiest Member of the Week - Most posts for the week ending 5/6/2014
    So because I believe my husband, I am unrealistic? LOL.

    Oh goodness me, there is no point to continuing this.

    And FTM I get what you are trying to say but to me saying you would rather not learn about the pron industry and what its like and the major issues with it, so that you can keep watching it without it being 'ruined' is like saying it's ok to eat meat that is killed inhumanely - cos if you dont see it, it doesnt exist and its ok? Honestly asking here, cos thats just the way I see it.


 
Closed Thread
Page 5 of 15 FirstFirst ... 34567 ... LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. *Spin Off* Platonic Relationship vs Open Relationship?
    By MuminMind in forum General Chat
    Replies: 138
    Last Post: 02-10-2014, 09:42
  2. 5 weeks preg, 7 misscarriages and terrified.
    By lonni in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 03-01-2012, 16:52

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Pebblebee
Parents spend hours looking for things they need NOW. The keys, the remote, darling daughter's treasured teddy. Stop wasting precious time looking & start finding with Bub Hub reviewed Pebblebee Smart Tag. Simply attach a Pebblebee and find it fast.
sales & new stuffsee all
The Health Hub
Give a new mum a fitness boost for Christmas & New Year. Studio-based, small group training sessions - cardio, strength, core, Pilates & boxing. Choice of 16 hrs per week, flexible-arrival feature - bubs & kids welcome! Gift vouchers available.
featured supporter
Softmats
Softmats specialises in safe, non-toxic, and durable play mats. The international Premium Dwinguler™ Play Mats and Premium Bubba Mat™ range of floor spaces are the best quality in the world.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!