It definitely can work and yes, I think it's ideal in that children have the right to spend time with both parents and both families. Generally speaking, one parent is no better than the other, both are just as capable if providing a loving, stable home. As a parent in a blended family I can definitely see the benefits of this for the kids.
My reading of the research is that it is not the proportion of time children spend with their parents, but the ability of the parents to co-parent civilly that matters. Personally, I am all for fathers, and I think they perform a role in the child's life that I as a mother cannot. Which is ironic as my children don't have a father in their life. I feel no sense of ownership of my children. I feel that Esme has a right to know her father in a real and authentic way. I don't think that fortnightly weekends gives a child an opportunity to really know thier other parent. I would be the best parent ever if I only saw my child two days a fortnight! Never cranky or busy, and always with something awesome planned.
I would love our youngest 50/50 but man I would be so scared as to wether it would be best for her.
I think its good it doesnt make the kid believe that 1 parent is better than the other, it doesnt make them visitors in one home. It allows both parents, both step parents and both families step siblings able to be a family, the child is open up to being a family member. It allows important bonds with siblings most likely will make the child feel more secure in where they belong in both families.
Also they dont have siblings on his side just the one here. He is recently single and doesnt plan to ever have another relationship and like i said unless both parents are happy to live too far apart for it to work. It should be more the norm than minority
Last edited by Lovemyfam; 13-12-2012 at 20:32.
I've always lived interstate from FOB and have never ever had to worry about access. We mostly all forget he exists unless he rings DS.
The thought of 50/50 makes my blood run cold!
Especially if FOB decided that now, 8 years later wanted to be part of DS's life more permanently.
It would absolutely traumatise DS if he had to leave us every second weekend let alone a week at a time.
It's all he's ever known for 8 years. I would fight till the death to avoid it in my situation.
I admire those that can make it work but could never feel Ok about it for us.
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