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  1. #271
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    Quote Originally Posted by ourbradybunch View Post
    Any woman I have known who has split from her partner has assumed the kids are going with mum.
    Could that be bc a vast majority of primary carers are women?

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    atomicmama  (16-12-2012),Benji  (16-12-2012),HugsBunny  (16-12-2012),Stiflers Mom  (16-12-2012)

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    Default Re: 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Yep bc wanting 50/50 care is really about getting out of paying CS and sticking it to the ex
    Or making sure the paying parent's income is low enough for a zero assessment That'll pull the witch into line!

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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Yep bc wanting 50/50 care is really about getting out of paying CS and sticking it to the ex
    No that wasnt the point as ourbradybunch is for childsupport the point was that this mother had her husband uprooting the family to stay in the kids life, and she tried to move again. She is complaining that she is broke but if she moved back she would have support and the fathers help and support with raising the children and obviously a good supportive step mom but if she is broke and moves back and the father saw the children more she would be even more broke (possibly in her mind) although I have a feeling that ourbradybunch and her husband would prob financially support these kids more than BM assumes.

    So you guys think it is right that Ourbradybunches husband is going through this? I know you will think he is a good father since he followed her around dragging new family with but do you think the BM is right in what she is doing even stating for him to give up. I mean come on you cant think she is doing whats best for the child.

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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Could that be bc a vast majority of primary carers are women?
    Definetly but decisions made as a joint happy couple obviously need to be reassessed when now a split couple.

    I don't agree that all/most/alot of men only want more custody to reduce CS. Obviously there's plenty of pricks out there who do this BUT there's definetly some good ones😆

    I think CS should be set at an amount like FTB part a, it seems wrong that mum a with a 2 yr old gets $10 a week yet mum b with a 2 yr old gets $200, how the hell is that fair???

    Why is child a worth more than child b???

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    Default Re: 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    No that wasnt the point as ourbradybunch is for childsupport the point was that this mother had her husband uprooting the family to stay in the kids life, and she tried to move again. She is complaining that she is broke but if she moved back she would have support and the fathers help and support with raising the children and obviously a good supportive step mom but if she is broke and moves back and the father saw the children more she would be even more broke (possibly in her mind) although I have a feeling that ourbradybunch and her husband would prob financially support these kids more than BM assumes.

    So you guys think it is right that Ourbradybunches husband is going through this? I know you will think he is a good father since he followed her around dragging new family with but do you think the BM is right in what she is doing even stating for him to give up. I mean come on you cant think she is doing whats best for the child.
    I don't know her or have her story first hand to know what she is doing or if its the best thing? Do you?

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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    No that wasnt the point as ourbradybunch is for childsupport the point was that this mother had her husband uprooting the family to stay in the kids life, and she tried to move again. She is complaining that she is broke but if she moved back she would have support and the fathers help and support with raising the children and obviously a good supportive step mom but if she is broke and moves back and the father saw the children more she would be even more broke (possibly in her mind) although I have a feeling that ourbradybunch and her husband would prob financially support these kids more than BM assumes.

    So you guys think it is right that Ourbradybunches husband is going through this? I know you will think he is a good father since he followed her around dragging new family with but do you think the BM is right in what she is doing even stating for him to give up. I mean come on you cant think she is doing whats best for the child.
    I've done the calculations thru CSA, with 50/50 care BM will lose max $50 per fortnight combining CSA & centrelink reductions, however she can then work ALOT more & has less stress & cuts out CC expenses.

    How could 50/50 care in our situation not be in the child's best interests.

    Better job/housing/education opportunities etc etc.

    Plus as my own bio kids receive a private education we would be covering ALL costs for DH kids to have the same private education😭

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    Quote Originally Posted by Stiflers Mom View Post
    I don't know her or have her story first hand to know what she is doing or if its the best thing? Do you?
    We know what she has shared with us and thats enough to know that her husband has gone above and beyond what I think a father should have to do to be in his childs life yet to some on this forum hes just a "good" dad because he let his ex do what she thought was "best for the children" and moved himself and his family at her whim. If that is simply a "good" dad I would hate to think what a "great" dad would have to do to please some of the women here.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ourbradybunch View Post
    I've done the calculations thru CSA, with 50/50 care BM will lose max $50 per fortnight combining CSA & centrelink reductions, however she can then work ALOT more & has less stress & cuts out CC expenses.

    How could 50/50 care in our situation not be in the child's best interests.

    Better job/housing/education opportunities etc etc.

    Plus as my own bio kids receive a private education we would be covering ALL costs for DH kids to have the same private education������
    Sounds like win win for the kids hopefully she will come around to see that.

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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Stiflers Mom View Post
    I don't know her or have her story first hand to know what she is doing or if its the best thing? Do you?
    No she doesn't but like all of us I think she's going off what I write here.

    At end of day like all these threads at end of day with all the differing opinions WE all can pretty much agree that our CSA & family law court system needs a MASSIVE overhaul

  12. #280
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    Quote Originally Posted by ourbradybunch View Post
    Any woman I have known who has split from her partner has assumed the kids are going with mum.
    This is because, more often than not, women do most of the child rearing. So children are more commonly with their mother than their father.

    I have never heard a woman say " well ex and I are yet to discuss custody of the kids & who they will live with as of course I want things to be fair & in the best interests of the kids "
    You do not know all women. Just because you haven't seen it happen, doesn't mean it doesn't. This is exactly what we did, as our child's best interests were most important. Of course, even as adults, the reality of what is the child's best interests can be difficult for everyone to cope with.

    I would include studying/work but I have to be honest if mum & dad split & mum studies but does NOT work it's not dads responsibility to financially support mum until she finishes studying. A dads responsibility is to financially contribute to his child.
    Sorry, but in what situation of a separated couple is the man financially responsible for the woman studying? My ex is not financially responsible for me while I study.

    However I think if you have 50/50 care of your child you can bust your a$$ in your week without kids to work & study surely?????

    If not I think that's showing my point of women doing what's easiest. I know from experience that working & studying is NOT easy but sometimes as a mother & a woman who wants what's best for your child you have to just suck it up & do what needs to be done.
    Again, only if 50/50 is actually practical. It quite often isn't if the two parents are not living close to each other.

    Forgive me if i am reading this wrong but it appears as if you are saying that if a mother doesn't work as well as study she is taking the 'easy' way. I can assure you this is not the case. Again, I study FULL TIME. And have primary care of my child. There are not enough hours in the day to add work to the mix as well due to my study load and the needs of my child.

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