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  1. #191
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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ana Gram View Post
    There is so much wrong with your opinion here. Mostly because it fails to see reality.

    I moved away. I have not taken an easy road.
    I never said women who move away have an easy time. I was basically saying a woman who moves her children away from a perfectly good and involved father because it is easier for herself is selfish.

    I don't think you fit that category.

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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I disagree. The place of residence should be where the family resided before the split.
    Why?? What good is that if the mother lives in poverty?? How ridiculous.

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  4. #193
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Its not about wanting the mother to live in poverty. It's about the child's right to know both parents equally.

    I stand by what I said: if the father is a good parent the mother shoudnt be allowed to move away. If she doesn't have family there thats just tough, she can learn to make friends. If she is in financial strife then do what other people do: get help, downgrade your housing, go back to school, do whatever is necessary. When a woman has a child she gives up her right to take the easy road and put herself first.

    If the Dad is a not a good person and doesn't care about the child, well that's a different story.
    In a perfect world no mum would have to move their child away from their father that is an involved good man.... unfortunately it isn't a perfect world. I think ideally, yes it's good to stay near the father.

    but what if there is no work and she can't pay the bills on Newstart? Should he be giving her more cs to pay her bills? what if the child needs to move schools for good reason? should the mother be forced to drive a hour extra each way 5 days a week to save the father an hour each way once a fortnight?

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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    I don't agree with that vic park..... Situations happen all the time like a mother who is a SAHM has moved with her husband of of state for his work.

    They then split up and she has to find a rental and start life as a single mum far from home with no support network.

    Happens all the time.

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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood View Post
    Why?? What good is that if the mother lives in poverty?? How ridiculous.
    No what's ridiculous is suggesting a woman who stays where she has been living will be in poverty whereas if she moves away she will be fine.

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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I never said women who move away have an easy time. I was basically saying a woman who moves her children away from a perfectly good and involved father because it is easier for herself is selfish.

    I don't think you fit that category.
    AS opposed to a father being selfish by expecting his child to live in poverty to cut a few mins or hours travel time?

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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    It's very true though - if you moved from rural NSW to Melbourne (for example) for your husbands work, then your marriage broke down, you'd be in a crappy position financially and with no support.

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    Also VicPark, correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't you in a happy marriage? What experience do you have with shared custody of a child in a split family?

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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    No what's ridiculous is suggesting a woman who stays where she has been living will be in poverty whereas if she moves away she will be fine.
    No one is saying it's a given, but yes it happens sometimes. She can't find work, can't pay the bills so moves to live with her parents to get on her feet.

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  13. #200
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I never said women who move away have an easy time. I was basically saying a woman who moves her children away from a perfectly good and involved father because it is easier for herself is selfish.

    I don't think you fit that category.

    I find it interesting that you would say that i don't fit into that category. I'm not entirely sure what you base it on. DD's dad was 'involved' and moving to where my family is has made it much easier. For a start, I can feed my child.

    I had to move because my rent went up till it was more than what was coming in. I stayed as long as I could but it just wasn't possibly anymore. I am incredibly lucky that I had family in a position to help. There are many women who are not that lucky.


 

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