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  1. #161
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    Surely you can see how incredibly complicated custodial issues are LMF.

    For my situation, my ex can take me to court and i can be forced to move back, despite the fact that he reluctantly agreed to me moving. This would be incredibly detrimental to our child. But there is still a chance this could happen.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ana Gram View Post
    Surely you can see how incredibly complicated custodial issues are LMF.

    For my situation, my ex can take me to court and i can be forced to move back, despite the fact that he reluctantly agreed to me moving. This would be incredibly detrimental to our child. But there is still a chance this could happen.
    yes they can be complicated bubhub has opened my eyes to a lot

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    HugsBunny is offline Once upon a time there was a bunny.........
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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    My XH took me to court after I moved with his permission - however I didn't have it in writing so couldn't prove he had said ok.

    He asked to have our children Thursday night until Tuesday morning, every second week. The magistrate told him it was not in the children's best interests and he was given every second weekend. There are no abuse issues, no problems at all - except that 'I' am their primary caregiver and it was not in their best interests to be away from me for that period of time.

    50/50 is not realistic in most cases and the courts recognize this.

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    The rules can't be black and white. I agree that your children will have great opportunities in Australia, a new family and they CAN go back and visit FOB (dependant on finances). Presumably they aren't suffering from stress or anxiety about being taken a long distance from their father, so here's a perfect example where mandatory 50/50 isn't necessary and could be detrimental.
    Last edited by Mod-xkwzit; 15-12-2012 at 14:51. Reason: unnecessary

  5. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Stiflers Mom For This Useful Post:

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    Quote Originally Posted by Stiflers Mom View Post
    The rules can't be black and white. I agree that your children will have great opportunities in Australia, a new family and they CAN go back and visit FOB (dependant on finances). Presumably they aren't suffering from stress or anxiety about being taken a long distance from their father, so here's a perfect example where mandatory 50/50 isn't necessary and could be detrimental.
    Like I said it should be up to the courts to decide when the parents cant come to an agreement. I also said I can see where in a lot of situations it wouldnt work but shouldnt this have to be proven not just one parent saying its bad I dont want it? What if in that case it would be good?
    Last edited by Mod-xkwzit; 15-12-2012 at 14:51. Reason: quoted post has been edited

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    Like I said it should be up to the courts to decide when the parents cant come to an agreement. I also said I can see where in a lot of situations it wouldnt work but shouldnt this have to be proven not just one parent saying its bad I dont want it? What if in that case it would be good?
    Would you want the court to decide that what you think is a great opportunity and the best option for your children (Australia, new family etc), is not? To forbid you from taking them. Even though you say again and again that the way it worked out is what everyone wanted, children included? That the wants and needs of one person, take precedence over the wants and needs of seven (?) others?

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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    So going by the recent comments above, if we changed our custodial laws, my exDH would 'automatically' get 50/50 care of my 15mth old and newborn baby in March, unless I took him to court to prove why this wouldn't be best??! Seriously where is the logic in handing over a newborn to the fob for 50/50?

    He'll be lucky to get an hour or so on weekends - and even then it will be in MY house for a long time, he won't be taking this baby far from his breastfeeding mother for a long time!

    That's the price exDH has to pay for leaving us suddenly while pregnant. And is a perfect example of why 'automatic 50/50 shared care' unless proven otherwise is ridiculous. More often than not it won't be in the best interests of very young children.

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    Default Re: 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by Pesca77 View Post
    So going by the recent comments above, if we changed our custodial laws, my exDH would 'automatically' get 50/50 care of my 15mth old and newborn baby in March, unless I took him to court to prove why this wouldn't be best??! Seriously where is the logic in handing over a newborn to the fob for 50/50?

    He'll be lucky to get an hour or so on weekends - and even then it will be in MY house for a long time, he won't be taking this baby far from his breastfeeding mother for a long time!

    That's the price exDH has to pay for leaving us suddenly while pregnant. And is a perfect example of why 'automatic 50/50 shared care' unless proven otherwise is ridiculous. More often than not it won't be in the best interests of very young children.
    If you go to Court he won't get shared care but he will get more than one hour a week and unless there is risk to your child it will not have to take place at your house.

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub

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    Some off topic posts have been removed in an attempt to un - derail (re - rail?) this thread.

    I think that 50/50 care for most families would be impractical, esp while children are young. Having said that, I'm sure there are some families for whom it works splendidly. The right solution will be different for different families.

    Cheers

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    Default 50/50 Shared Care: Do you think it is realistic?

    Quote Originally Posted by MsTruth View Post
    If you go to Court he won't get shared care but he will get more than one hour a week and unless there is risk to your child it will not have to take place at your house.

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub
    I find it very hard to believe our Court would allow a fully breastfed newborn to be away from their mother for longer durations?? How would fob feed said baby?? The Courts can't 'force' me to express, nor could they legally authorize formula against the parents wishes surely?

    If they were able to do this then our system is a lot worse than I ever thought. Thankfully I won't have to worry about this, considering the main reason DH left was because I decided to keep this unplanned baby anyway.


 

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