I agree and also disagree with your post.
I think it's an unrealistic expectation to think that step parents should treat kids equally.
I think the term "equal" gets thrown around a lot and people are jumping up and down thinking there is some sort of injustice.
I feel really strongly about people being allowed to be open and honest that all children from a blended family are different. The love and bond each parent has with each child is a seperate entity.
I know I 'click' with one of my three children more so than the other two. It's just a personality thing.
I don't feel guilty about it and nor should I.
Just like I don't feel guilty about never clicking at all with my SS.
It's a taboo subject that needs to be addressed sometimes.
I don't have anything close to a meaningful relationship with him and I never will.
I will not be held responsible for the way my step son "blooms into adulthood" or his happiness (which he is). It has no relevance on my feelings toward him.
He is a product of his conception and circumstances. The truth is he will never be "equal" to my children in what life has to offer.
Just like my children will never be "equal" to other children who experience even greater financial freedom, travel etc etc.
He will be never be equal to the way I feel about the children I birthed.
And this is all Ok and fine. He will be absolutely fine.
He will have no lasting effects just because his step mother didn't love him.
Life isn't all roses especially in step families.
Life is tough and people need to stop crying about the poor step children.