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  1. #31
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    Just some random thoughts...

    Could it be he didn't mention he was there as he didn't want to stress you out knowing how you felt about her? The fact that she contacted you makes me think it's innocent enough because who would try and start up an affair with a married guy and tip off the wife?

    Any chance a colleague of his can go around and do the work instead?

  2. #32
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    Default Re: Does he have something to hide?

    I would ask him if he had anything to tell you because you got information firm someone that he's been at this woman's house.

    He had no reason to be there if he has a shop and for her to msg you and ask you that she is pretty much telling you that s he has an intention to try something.

    I've been through something similar in Feb but I gave him another chance and as broken as my trust is with every single person on this each things are good.

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub

  3. #33
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    If he knew it would upset me he shouldn't have gone so I understand what your saying but If something seems innapropriate for me to do i wouldn't do it and he should be the same. The fact that she contacted me isn't surprising really because that's what she is like, she told me that she wanted to **** him that's why we are not friends anymore. I see her once a month for a work catchup (I stopped working there when my DD was born) and it is always the same story with her, I feel that she is a bit jealous of what i have because she was saying last time i saw her that she will never have a baby because she can't find the right guy. She knows that I would leave DH no questions asked if he ever cheated on me because I told her back in the day when we were closer. He know i would leave him because I have 3 rules in a marriage the unforgiveable rules and they are never hit me, never hurt my children and never cheat, it is something that I just can't forgive. The thought of it makes me sick to my stomach. By messaging me maybe she thinks she will get what she wants, there is no point blaming her for it because she is not the married one he knows the rules and if he wants to break them then that is the gamble he chooses to make. I will still leave him.

  4. #34
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    OP, you sound very level headed and honestly i would be very hurt that he even lied (well forgot to mention) about going there.

    I hope you get to the bottom of it, and its nothing to worry about.

    Its such an awful awful feeling *hugs*.

    Time for a serious chat. Tell him EXACTLY how u feel, everything you have shared with us all here.

    All the best

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by kochanski View Post
    Just some random thoughts...

    Could it be he didn't mention he was there as he didn't want to stress you out knowing how you felt about her? The fact that she contacted you makes me think it's innocent enough because who would try and start up an affair with a married guy and tip off the wife?

    Any chance a colleague of his can go around and do the work instead?
    Because for some women the thrill in the chase is having the wife know they can get to their husband or that they already have, its quite common

  6. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to ermergerd For This Useful Post:

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  7. #36
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    Default Does he have something to hide?

    OP just read through everything.

    You need to have an honest talk about all this with your husband.

    Personally if it was me, I would also talk to this other woman.
    Don't tell her your intimidated but simply just state that due to you having a child and another on the way you feel it would be better for your family if your husband was to work on the car at his home.


    If I had gotten a message asking me what type of alcohol my Dh likes I would have ignored it TBH.
    I would have ignored it until I had spoken to him.

    I also would NOT talk to my husband over the phone about any of it, I would wait until he had no time to plan excuses about his whereabouts.

    And I agree with PP, she sounds like a home wrecker.
    Seems she strives off the drama and attention with the kind of history you have given..
    Texting you, rubbing the fact that your husband, one she has admitted she would like to have sex with, was t her house.. After hours..
    Whilst you are are most vulnerable (pregnancy)
    Yes if your husband cheats then it is his fault not her's when it comes to your marriage.. But don't underestimate how sly these kind of women can be.
    I would be trying to protect my husband from a whole world of drama that he most likely has no idea about.

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  9. #37
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    I will talk to him when he gets home whevever that will be and try and get to the bottom of it. I am no longer that angry because I have had a cry and that always helps to ease the anger. I just don't know how to talk calmly about something like this.

  10. #38
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    Default Does he have something to hide?

    Meow - this chick is up to no good!

    He admitted only when confronted and I bet she took great pleasure in messaging you questioning his tastes - she probably already knows!!

    Sorry love. A spade's a spade and a shovel's a shovel! He's cheating!

  11. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by LilMuffin View Post
    I will talk to him when he gets home whevever that will be and try and get to the bottom of it. I am no longer that angry because I have had a cry and that always helps to ease the anger. I just don't know how to talk calmly about something like this.
    To start with I'd try and keep my talking to a minimum. Open up a dialogue by asking him what the story is. Let him do the talking, he's the one who owes you an explanation. If he starts getting very defensive or seems to have a very well rehearsed story then go from there.

  12. #40
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    I don't know if he's cheating, but there are def warning signs there. Even if they did nothing, he knew how you felt about this girl and what she had said and 1) still went around there 2) lied about being there.

    As for her, I believe she is trying to cause trouble. whether they were together or not, she knew you would be angry he was there, that's why she told you. Clearly they have each others number (I'm just guessing, since you didn't know about it I'm thinking she contacted him?) why can't she just ring him and ask what he drinks?

    Given that he only come clean when you had solid evidence against him tells me he's probably not going to tell you the truth anyway

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