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  1. #21
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    Default Re: Does he have something to hide?

    Quote Originally Posted by LifeInShadesOfGrey View Post
    I agree with this, get him to do the work (if he has to do it) at your house. Will help give you piece of mind.
    Yes. A very good alternative.

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  2. #22
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    He's cheating.

  3. #23
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    Default Does he have something to hide?

    Quote Originally Posted by faroutbrusselsprout View Post
    He didn't tell you he was there until you confronted him about it?
    Enough said for me.


    I smell so many rats here. Someone's up to no good, whether it's just her or him as well. I would be asking questions and staying very alert.

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  5. #24
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    Default Re: Does he have something to hide?

    I don't understand why he's doing her any favours, she's not his friend and she's not your friend so why is he helping her out ?

    It could be that he's just a nice bloke that goes out of his way for people but I'd think the last thing he'd want to do after a long day at work fixing cars is to go to a strangers house and fix one for free.

    If I were you I'd be telling him under no circumstances do you want him going to her house to work on the car. If it's stuffed she can have it towed to his workshop or your house.

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    The fact that he felt he needed to hide it from you worries me a bit. I would certainly be prepared for a long, honest conversation tonight.

  8. #26
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    Default Re: Does he have something to hide?

    Oh dear.. Maybe you should tell her exactly what you think! Both of them would be in for it in my books!

    Hugs hun x

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    Quote Originally Posted by LilMuffin View Post
    well he rang me about a totally unrelated thing (we got approval for a loan to build our new house) he could tell i was short with him and he asked what was wrong. i said what did you do on Wed night? He sighed and said he had been to her house, I didn't want to go in to any more detail over the phone because we have been together for 11 years and i know when he is lying so want to talk face to face.

    To answer some questions yes he knew we were friends, yes i told him what she had said about him to which he laughed and admitted at the time he was flattered. I had said to him I didn't like him helping her out outside of hours because he has done it before. Yes he likes to help everyone and to be honest it annoys the crap out of me, he always puts me last if i need anything because he doesn't like letting people down. He lets me down all the time and knows i will accept it because I love him. I have spoken to him on so many occassions that he needs to come home at a reasonable hour on a work night because I need help with DD but he does it for a few days and then retreats to his onld ways. He finishes work at 5 and works about 30 mins away he is never home before 6.30 and out of the 4 nights so far has been later than 6.30 three times. He goes to his mums or helps a friend or goes to this girls house. I can understand someone being stranded and needing help but she was at home she could have called a tow truck. I am sick of other people impeding in our family time and if he cant put his family first for once and for all he can **** off. i did ask him what was wrong with the car and he said it is stuffed, so now i am assuming she is going to get him to help fix it and because she doesn't have much money he will do it after hours for her aggghhhh i am so ****ed. Everyone is always after a favour.
    Hugs My dh is a knight in shinny armour type too. Boy they are frustrating at times.
    You need to set very concrete barriers that he is not to do anything for her outside work. That this time you come first. If her car needs work than it will done on the books at work and work out a payment plan rather than a backyardie.

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    I think what makes me angry most is I am pregnant, i couldn't be in a more vunerable position. I feel so unnattractive as it is and now he is going behind my back helping her out, I will never understand. She is alot skinnier than i am (obviously at the moment haha) but she has the personality of a rock seriously. She does nothing but complain about her boyfriends when she is with them and then cheats on them when something better comes along. She loves the attention. She is not very attractive either if she was really good looking i could understand (not saying i am a stunner but i think i am prettier than he). I asked him if he was bored of me (we have both only ever been with eachother IYKWIM). He says no he loves me but why won't he have sex with me? I don't get it, I am actually a very open person when it comes to intimacy so it's not like he is going without so I will never understand. Unless he simply is bored. I know some of you are saying talk to him before you jump to conclusions but i know my husband and he would be loving the attention. I have had to step in twice before when "friends" have overstepped the mark with him, they are no longer my friend either. The thing is those times he thought they were just being nice he doesn't notice the flirtation until i point it out. I am hoping that this is the case but i doubt it, if he knows what she said he would be aware that this would be an innapropriate positon for him to put himself in. I honestly think he likes it.

  11. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by LilMuffin View Post
    I think what makes me angry most is I am pregnant, i couldn't be in a more vunerable position. I feel so unnattractive as it is and now he is going behind my back helping her out, I will never understand. She is alot skinnier than i am (obviously at the moment haha) but she has the personality of a rock seriously. She does nothing but complain about her boyfriends when she is with them and then cheats on them when something better comes along. She loves the attention. She is not very attractive either if she was really good looking i could understand (not saying i am a stunner but i think i am prettier than he). I asked him if he was bored of me (we have both only ever been with eachother IYKWIM). He says no he loves me but why won't he have sex with me? I don't get it, I am actually a very open person when it comes to intimacy so it's not like he is going without so I will never understand. Unless he simply is bored. I know some of you are saying talk to him before you jump to conclusions but i know my husband and he would be loving the attention. I have had to step in twice before when "friends" have overstepped the mark with him, they are no longer my friend either. The thing is those times he thought they were just being nice he doesn't notice the flirtation until i point it out. I am hoping that this is the case but i doubt it, if he knows what she said he would be aware that this would be an innapropriate positon for him to put himself in. I honestly think he likes it.
    He could be liking the attention, did you use to give him more? He seems to be a nice guy and sometimes those nice guys step in **** and dont even see it coming. He may not think she is up to something like you said he cant see it.

  12. #30
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    Default Does he have something to hide?

    It sounds like he is doing the wrong thing not her. Ask him why he didn't tell you he went there.


 

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