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  1. #1
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    Default 1st Pregnancy and Hubby has just started working away

    Hi All,
    Im currently 25 weeks pregnant, and when I was 6 weeks pregnant my hubby got a job out in the mines, doing 28 days on, 8 days off.
    It has been a hard adjustment. 28 days away from my hubby is hard enough with out adding the pregnancy on top off that. Its our first and we are so close & love each other so much, its just so hard being apart, especially at such a special time.

    He is currently away on his second rotation and I have found this one much harder. Its dragging out and my hubby is missing out on so much, gender scan, family xmas parties and bubs is just moving around so much, I wish he was here to share it with me.
    The money is good of course, but I just dont think its worth it. I cried the first week he was gone, knowing we had 4 weeks to go till he is home. I am so lucky to have heaps of family and friends around who try to keep me busy, but its just not the same as having my hubby around. He is my best friend and we have never spent more than 1-2 weeks apart in the 11 years we have been together.

    I guess i'm venting, but I also want to ask you all, does it get any easier, or only harder? Im so scared of doing everything on my own when this baby arrives. Do you think it can have a negative impact on your relationship being apart for this long? We are not fighting or anything and its like the honeymoon period when he is home, but im nervous about him doing this work for too long.

  2. #2
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    Default 1st Pregnancy and Hubby has just started working away

    Gees what mines does he work at???
    My son works in the mines also he does 1 on 1 off...that's along time for him to be away .....(((((HUGS)))))

  3. #3
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    Default 1st Pregnancy and Hubby has just started working away

    Thats a tough roster, hopefully once he's been in the scene for a few months he will be able to find a different company with a more family friendly roster.

    We do 1 week on & 1 week off, its not too bad but there is no way i could do 4 & 1 (not for long anyway).

    We facetime every night, and text/call during day, definitely helps.

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    Default 1st Pregnancy and Hubby has just started working away

    It does get easier and you find your own groove with the kids, my DH is on an 8/6 roster and has been for about 5 years. I guess all you can do is see what happens when bub arrives and re-asses from there. Good luck

  5. #5
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    Thanks ladies. It is a horrible roster. He has only just joined the industry and we are hoping he get on a better roster eventually. It's not to bad right now, while i am pregnant, but I'am so worried about how I will cope when the baby arrives. I just get so sad when I think about it. We made the desicion to have a baby together, and I feel like I will be doing this on my own. He got the job the week after we fell pregnant, and to be totally honest, if he had of got the job before we fell pregnant, I would have put off having a baby. I just dont want to do this on my own.
    I had a moment the other night, when I had some pain in my belly late at night, and it just made me so anxious not having my hubby there. I just dont know how long we will be able to do this roster. I just dont think its normal to be apart from your partner for this long. I dont know why these companies have such long swings, its just ridiculous!!
    Sorry to vent again.

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    Default 1st Pregnancy and Hubby has just started working away

    That is a tough roster. My hubby has worked in the mines for quite a few years now so I was used to being on my own and didn't mind too much while pregnant. Our 1st child was born in January this year and it has been an adjustment for both me and hubby.

    He had the first 6 weeks off after DS was born which was wonderful as it gave me help and support (especially great after a c section), and gave him the chance to bond with our son. I found his first few hitches back at work a bit rough, but once bub and I found a routine that worked for us, we got into the swing of things. Yes, somedays I wish hubby had a normal job and was home every night and on weekends as it would be so nice to have an extra pair of hands, especially when I'm having a rough day, but you just push forward and get through 1 day at a time!

    I love the fact that hubby gets 2 weeks of uninterrupted family time with us when he is home and I think this more than makes up for him being away and missing some things.

    For me it has definitely gotten easier, especially once we got past the newborn stage and DS was sleeping better. Sleep deprivation makes things tough! Make sure you utilise your support people whether it be friends or family. Get them to help out with housework or cooking meals or even just have them round so you can have a shower in peace while they hold baby for you. Cook some bulk meals and and have them in the freezer to use when hubby is away so you don't have to worry about trying to cook for one person.

    If you ever want to chat, feel free to PM me. xx

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to summastarlet For This Useful Post:

    1stpregnancy83  (13-12-2012)

  8. #7
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    Thanks Summastarlet, your comments are really helpful. Its great to be able to speak to other women who understand, as other people just dont get it.
    I know I will be okay and I will cope, but its just not how I want to do things. My hubby is so hands on and I know he will be such a wonderful help when our son arrives, but he will only be able to take off a couple of weeks. Its just makes me sad to think he will only see his son for 1 week every 5 weeks. If the rotation was like two weeks on and two weeks off, I could totally manage and be okay with that, I just cant get my head around doing it on my own for 4 weeks at a time as a new mother.
    sorry for the pity party, but I think its only hit me. I have had NO sleep the past two nights, I just cant stop worrying about it and it doesnt help that I suffer cronic back pain aswell, & its only getting worse the bigger my belly gets. So I think Iam just finding it hard to deal with atm.
    I do feel lucky to have friends and family around me, but I cant rely on them all the time. I will be getting super organised before bubs gets here and cook lots of bulk meals, as I know that will help when I have my hands full!
    Thanks again
    x

  9. #8
    TrulyBlessed is offline Winner 2009 - Member you would most like to meet in Real Life
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    Default 1st Pregnancy and Hubby has just started working away

    Massive hugs hun that is a tough roster. I'm lucky my DP is a rig manager so does 2/2. But most he's ever done is 2 in 1 off.

    You do find routine that works for you which will make things easier. The aim is to stay busy while they are away that way you aren't sitting around bored wishing them home etc.

  10. #9
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    Hi there, I am 15 weeks pregnanat and currently do FIFO work with my husband on a 28/7 roster. And you are so right - it is an awfully long time to be away! I am planning on working till close to 30 weeks if all goes to plan, and agter that my husband will change to a 21/7 roster, will still be a long time away from each other as we are used to being together (working/eating/sleeping) ALL the time!!
    I don't have any advice to give you but just wanted to let you know that I am feeling as worried as you are. I have great family and friends also, but it is not the same as your husband..... We are going to see how we go, and if it doesn't work will have to assess.
    Where abouts are you from? Would be good to have a friend nearby going through the same thing!
    Take care
    X

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    1stpregnancy83  (14-01-2013)

  12. #10
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    Hi,
    Yeah 21/7 is still a tough roster, and especially if you are so used to doing everything together, it will be a big adjustment as I know it has for me!
    We are doing the same thing, just seeing how we go and will re-asses things if it isnt working out.
    I'm in Brisbane, where are you?


 

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