See, I think that as an adult she should respect the other person and not be so damn selfish as to deceive him into thinking things are reasonably safe.
Yes, ultimately he is responsible for his own contraception, but he believed that there is contraception in place. I dunno. It's just wrong.
OP maybe send your friend some info on private sperm donation. Does she realise there's a less messy alternative?
Also asked Dh
He agrees it's disgusting.
No matter how you twist it OP's friend is doing something despicable!
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Of course she should.
Yes, he is. He is also responsible if that contraception should fail is he not? If he doesn't want the responsibility of a child/CS than he shouldn't have sex, a down side to being male I guess?
I really haven't answered the OP's question..Yes I think you should say something especially because it's such a new relationship, maybe some anonymous info on the fail rates of the pill? Or just a plain out heads up..
Last edited by headoverfeet; 03-12-2012 at 20:03.
You have to tell the guy, it's the right thing to do but I would give your friend one more chance to have the talk with him. She should be honest or just blardy wait like the rest of the decent people out there in happy healthy relationships!
30 is not the end of the world you need to reason with her and get her to pick up her self esteem...that's what it amounts to, she doesn't back herself to keep the guy long enough for him to want to have kids with her.
A few years ago I was saying if I got to 32 and had no kids I would consider a donor or look into adoption - I moved to Australia, got rid of some negative people and started living my life...in no time I attracted males who were interested in me for me amazing how being happy within yourself attracts the opposite sex sounds like ur friend is not happy.
I understand that at any time contraception could fail, but when someone deliberately stops using the contraception to trick the other, well that to me is all kinds of wrong.
Sorry I do want to say that I don't think it's a good way to go about bringing a child into the world, especially if she is planning on making him financially responsible.
Not to mention if she is telling people this it will get back to the kid who will most likely not forgive the mother for this, I know I couldnt and would ditch her as soon as I could and think so poorly of her.
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