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  1. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mathermy View Post
    UM WTF??

    Nothing like date rape I'm afraid!!

    And they are BOTH irresponsible trusting one another not to give each other HIV, herpes, syphilis, etc after a mere month of casual sex. It might not be romantic but it's reality.

    She is acting completely immoral, he just plain old foolish.

    ETA: As for the chances of falling pregnant on the pill being miniscule, one only need to read a few bubhub threads to know that it's actually not that uncommon. No excuse for what this woman is doing, but it's a little naive to think the pill is fail safe when it quite clearly isn't.
    You don't know that they haven't been tested for STDs.
    The comparison to date rape was just to say that someone isn't to blame for trusting someone. I'm not saying 'it's like he is being date raped'. Goodness, these types of comparisons often aren't very well understoon on bubhub.

  2. #52
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    Default What would you do in my situation!?

    There are ways for your friend to become pregnant without having to resort to this kind of deception OP.

    They're called sperm banks.

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  4. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by Meg2 View Post
    You don't know that they haven't been tested for STDs.
    The comparison to date rape was just to say that someone isn't to blame for trusting someone. I'm not saying 'it's like he is being date raped'. Goodness, these types of comparisons often aren't very well understoon on bubhub.
    Of course they aren't! Perhaps we should be mindful of how many women on bubhub have been the victim of rape and sexual assault & perhaps not make such comparisons?

    Being raped is in no way shape or form comparable to an individual having consensual sex and taking no responsibility for their own contraception (& sexual health) & dealing with the consequences of an unexpected or unwanted pregnancy.

    I know the point you are trying to make, I think the way you chose to make it was inappropriate. As was probably my response to it, because I found the concept offensive. Apologies.

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  6. #54
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    Wow disgusting, I would tell him that way he knows and can really protect himself. I know everyone would protect themselves but if one is using control and there is no STDs there (assuming they know this about each other) then one using protection should be enough. Tricking a man so you can have a baby is just so wrong in so many ways. She isnt just effecting herself if she gets pregnant she is effecting the child, and the father. She wont go about it on her own, this poor guy will have a child he didnt want and for 18 years plus it will effect his life, her life and any future partners they have.

    Why doesnt she just do donation this leaves her to do it on her own (since she thinks its so simple) and not have a child whose father doesn't want to know him or a father who is roped in financially for 18 years because she WANTED a baby. If telling him breaks up your friendship so be it she seems like a tosser anyway.

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  8. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mathermy View Post
    Of course they aren't! Perhaps we should be mindful of how many women on bubhub have been the victim of rape and sexual assault & perhaps not make such comparisons?

    Being raped is in no way shape or form comparable to an individual having consensual sex and taking no responsibility for their own contraception (& sexual health) & dealing with the consequences of an unexpected or unwanted pregnancy.

    I know the point you are trying to make, I think the way you chose to make it was inappropriate. As was probably my response to it, because I found the concept offensive. Apologies.
    Fair enough. I guess I was offended at people saying it was the guy's fault, it sounded like victim blaming so I made that comparison. Didnt mean to offend.

  9. #56
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    Theres also the question of her suitability as a parent. This is a woman who is deliberately tricking a guy into getting her pregnant. Shes so immature at nearly 30 that she can't even discuss her desire for a child with her boyfriend. She's clearly in need of some help, or at the very least a sperm bank.

    Can not wait for a thread where its the woman whose boyfriend lied or tampered with his contraception to come out. Then we'll see some double standards.

    Although its great to know that as women, we not only have to rights to our body but apparently the rights to the bodies, future and presumably wage of any man we sleep with. Very liberated indeed! Tell your sons to watch out, ladies...

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  11. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by zombiekitty View Post
    I would tell him.
    I find women like your friend pathetic and revolting.
    No doubt she'd be the first to cry foul if she has a child and the father won't pay CS or see the child.
    Ugh.
    I think if its provable then the CS should not go to the mother its gross and just makes me ill to think that people are doing this. I know a victim of this, he tried to do the right thing and be there for the child but she made it so difficult and kept moving, verbally abusing him, he got to see the baby twice after it was born once to sign the BC ( so she could grab that CS) and once because she needed a ride. No doubt she is the victim to her friends. She sent him an e-mail to enjoy the maintenance payments

    Quote Originally Posted by WineTime View Post
    So you'd apply this same logic if the situation were reversed? If he told her he were using a condom and then sabotaged it in some way because he wanted a child you'd say its tough luck for her because she should've been on the pill as well?
    Does she not have a say in the end result (pregnancy)? Or can she then choose to have an abortion (without his consent), an option not available to the man in the OP.
    I agree, women can have abortion and kill a mans child but if a man even suggested an abortion he would be scum of the earth.

    Quote Originally Posted by Baracuda View Post
    Theres nothing wrong with wanting a baby and 'using' a guy to get one at all IMO - if a woman goes out and has a one night stand with some intention if getting pregnant and no intention if involving him then so be it - he's an idiot for not fail-safing his protection. 'I thought she was on the pill' is not a good enough reason and every individual is responsible for their own contraception.
    OMFG are you being serious right now? If you are in a relationship and are told they are protected your an idiot for trusting them? I feel like puking right now. How would you feel if a woman couldn't have an abortion for whatever reason and a guy lied and poked holes in the condom to get her pregnant is that ok too? Oh this is the most disgusting thing I have read in a long time. I mean if you want to have a kid get a donor, dont trick some guy who is then going to have to take financial responsibility for another human being for 18 years. I am just glad I am not a guy.

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  13. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baracuda View Post
    OP - for the record I don't think your friend is an awful evil witch. Lots if women want babies and start to feel desperate approaching 30....
    I think her friend is an awful, evil witch, many men want to spread their seed, if this was some guy poking holes in condoms to get a woman pregnant I think people would be singing a different song.

    Why can't she just be honest, responsible and mature?

  14. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by WineTime View Post
    Theres also the question of her suitability as a parent. This is a woman who is deliberately tricking a guy into getting her pregnant. Shes so immature at nearly 30 that she can't even discuss her desire for a child with her boyfriend. She's clearly in need of some help, or at the very least a sperm bank.

    Can not wait for a thread where its the woman whose boyfriend lied or tampered with his contraception to come out. Then we'll see some double standards.

    Although its great to know that as women, we not only have to rights to our body but apparently the rights to the bodies, future and presumably wage of any man we sleep with. Very liberated indeed! Tell your sons to watch out, ladies...
    WOW couldnt have said it better you are spot on! I have already talked to my son about things like this I can only hope he listens

  15. #60
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    Lovemyfan, you've quoted me up there but thatsnot really what I was saying so I think you've misunderstood my point. Not going to get into it, but for the record I completely agree with a womans right to abort, with or without the guys approval/input. Just wanted to make that clear.

    Ib fact I shouldn't have even brought that aspect up because this is nothing to do with abortion.

    Moving on now!


 

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