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  1. #131
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    I agree Caz. I do think the partner needs to be warned and deserves the truth but I do think something is wrong with her too. To be that desperate just seems sad. There was a man on Dr Phil years ago who was making love to his wife in the middle of the night and also pulling condoms off without her knowledge/consent. He seemed so scared of her leaving, and scared of not having more children on the way... it was like an anxiety thing.

    I do think the fact that she's going to these lengths, when there is the ease of donors, means something has gone wrong.

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  3. #132
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    My DH just made a valid point. I was discussing this thread with him and i get this blank look on his face...

    "What do you mean the pill is not 100% effective?"

    He honestly did not know. I have not been on the pill, so we have never discussed it.

    Question: In all honesty, how much do men actually really know about female contraception options?

    My point being, If he doesn't know and he is putting his trust in her, he is not only being deceived but also being put in an emotional and financial situation that he may not be ready for. Who has the right to try and decide someones future for them?

    I dont know if i would have the guts to walk up to him and tell him face to face but i think i would try and find some way to get the information to him so he can be part of making a decision that will affect him for the rest of his life.

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  5. #133
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    I told my DF about this thread too. I asked him if he was with someone for that long and they said they were on the pill would he trust that they were telling the truth and he said yes. Maybe men are a bit more trusting than women are?

    In saying that, my DF only knows about the pill. Hes heard of some other BC options for women, but doesnt know much about them.

  6. #134
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    Default What would you do in my situation!?

    Haven't read previous posts but I would tell the guy anonymously somehow-tricking someone into creating a child is not okay! If she wants a child that much-there are other options available that are much more responsible n less deceiving...
    Not only that but I doubt she would know any family history on his side that could affect the child's health!!

    Sure each person is responsible for themselves but if she is saying she is on the pill n isn't-that's just bad form!

  7. #135
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    I do find it interesting that there are some in this thread who hate this but also who before said no way a man can get tricked. I am glad that the majority of people think its bad but I know some on this forum and even in this thread think its impossible for a man to be tricked.

  8. #136
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    I do find it interesting that there are some in this thread who hate this but also who before said no way a man can get tricked. I am glad that the majority of people think its bad but I know some on this forum and even in this thread think its impossible for a man to be tricked.
    Trying to understand what you mean by this Lovemyfam?

  9. #137
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    Quote Originally Posted by ready baby 3 View Post
    Trying to understand what you mean by this Lovemyfam?
    Oh just an old thread where it was said to other that a man cant be tricked into getting someone pregnant that its his fault for it ever happening is all.

  10. #138
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    I would make her change her mind. I would tell the guy if she wont.
    Poor guy! Total entrapment. Or the guy could turn out to be abusive! 4 weeks id not long enough to know someone. And poor kid if she end up having one, the child might be brought up without a father figure.
    Also being a single mom is not as easy as it may seem.
    Sorry but shes selfish and hasnt thought things through.

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  12. #139
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    Default What would you do in my situation!?

    I would talk again to my friend and try and reason with her. A few of my friends have had periods where they were thinking of having a baby that way...
    This idea came from a lonely and dark place.

    I would not speak to the guy though. He should take his contraception in his own hands. This happened to 3 close male of mine. And I have warned my single male friends that when ladies hit 30 they might start getting silly ideas.

    I would never be having sex without condoms + pill before being sure that I was in a long term committed relationship anyway (and yes get both my partner and I tested for STDs).

    ETA - If the male pill was available and my new partner was telling me that he was on the pill (same process as female pill), I would trust him BUT I would also stay on the pill or use condoms.
    No way that I would leave the possibility of a pregnancy up to him. What if the male pill fails? What if he forgets to take it that one time? What if he wants to trick me?
    One of my good male friend is terrified to have a child, he told me he would never have sex without a condom. Ever. Even drunk. Even if it means that he can't have sex cause he doesn't have any condom left.
    Last edited by ExcuseMyFrench; 05-12-2012 at 19:35.

  13. #140
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    Quote Originally Posted by bpac View Post
    My point being, If he doesn't know and he is putting his trust in her, he is not only being deceived but also being put in an emotional and financial situation that he may not be ready for. Who has the right to try and decide someones future for them?
    He is deciding for himself by not using any contraception. If the roles were reversed, I would trust my partner that he is on the pill but I would never leave such a life changing decision on just his shoulders. I would also take the pill or use condoms.

    Quote Originally Posted by starflame View Post
    Maybe men are a bit more trusting than women are?
    I think some men are just too damn lazy to think about it twice and that is easier for them to assume that everything is taken care of. Also s3x is apparently much better without a condom and I believe that some men drive their decisions on this.
    2 of my male cousins got a baby in similar situations and 1 other good friend of mine. I feel sorry for them but they brought it on themselves.

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