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  1. #1
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    Default 18m/o hits our cat and other kids

    My 18 month old daughter has been hitting other kids. I don't know what to think of it, it's not that hard that the other kid cries, it's just not nice. Usually I'm not sitting right next to her (at mums group) and notice her do it, so I clap twice and say "Chloe don't hit" she looks at me, and I think she knows she's not supposed but will do it again later.

    As for the cat, she used to hit her while 'patting' her, so I would say "no Chloe, be gentle with lola', but lately, she's been hitting the hat hard on the back when she doesn't get her way or in a bad mood.
    For example, while heating her milk she sometimes gets annoyed it's taking too long, so she hit the cat like 3 times. so I tell her "no" firmly.
    Sorry for the novel, But I'm not sure if I'm handling it right. What do you do in these situations and does it help?

  2. #2
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    That's a hard one. It depends on your parenting style I guess. Our DD gets put into time out. Usually a 1 , 2 and on 3 if she hasn't done or stopped what she's not meant to be doing. If it's something like hitting then she gets put in time out straight away.

    I know not everyone likes to use that approach though. I suggest just looking through different behaviour management techniques with kids and see what you like. Do a little research. Hopefully someone on here has some great suggestions that fit with your parenting style.

    Children also go through phases and can often get frustrated if they can't word what they want and I also think they have trouble letting their anger and frustration out.

  3. #3
    Squeegee is offline Wanting to add a new squeegee to the family
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    You could try showing her what to do...ie take her hand and say "we pat the cat softly" or "we use gentle hands" and same with other kids....remind her of what she "should" be doing. Show her how mummy uses gentle hands with her. Then distract her and move on. Perservere and she will eventually get it.
    Please be reassured you are doing a good job.

  4. #4
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    I agree that many little ones do go through this phase. As far as dealing with rough behaviour with other children, with mine, I will use a firm voice (different to my usual voice) and say something like "No, don't hit people, it hurts and it will make (insert name here) sad" and then some kind of extra warning for the consequence "If you do it again we will have to go, no more playing!" or something along those lines. I definitely think at 18 months they are old enough to understand a warning and a feeling that mum or dad are definitely not happy with their behaviour. Of course, then you must follow through with whatever the warning may be - if they really are hitting a lot or playing very roughly, you have to remove them from the situation. Thankfully, the phase will pass. I think the key thing is to be consistent and follow through. They will get it. And you must lead by example, model good behaviour!


    Just one more thing I was thinking, is that all kids tend to misbehave if they're tired or hungry, so the timing of playdates is important. All the best.


 

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