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  1. #41
    LifeInShadesOfGrey's Avatar
    LifeInShadesOfGrey is offline Just a little bit silly :)
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    Default Have you been in this position?

    I would just be honest with your friend. She should understand and if she doesn't understand then give her time and she will. Just explain that it is important to you and that you appreciate her opinion on the matter as well and you would like to come up with a way to make it work for a few months and it won't impact on your friendship.

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    Default Re: Have you been in this position?

    You shouldn't have to make a big speech to her. I know how uncomfortable that would be. I would casually bring it up in conversation over the phone or whatever. Just say you heard that wc is around at the moment so you hope no one who is sick, recently exposed or recently vaxxed comes around cos you heard that story of a bub that got sick as a new born and you're nervous enough having a new baby as it is. Your could also day you were talking to a close family member about not letting ANYONE who has a cough or sneeze near bub and how badly they took it but they just have to suck it up. A little white lie.. reducing the risk though is the only thing you can do. If they do come over, nick off to feed bub to sleep.

    We do unfortunately know people that think giving everyone their germs is good for everyone. Apparently it boosts you're immune system. Yeah sure but not babies. We(DP, dd's and I) have good immune systems and we don't need our yearly flu cough/sneeze on to boost it. Yes these people are always getting gastro, flu's, bugs etc. at least 1 virus a month.

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    I don't wish to be argumentative, but I think the idea that all unvaccinated children are reservoirs of disease, is running rife in this thread. Which is simply not true. With regard to whooping cough in particular, many vaccinated kids get it and pass it on. Part of our transmission problem is that people "think"
    that because their child is vaccinated they won't get WC or dismiss a cough as WC and continue to socialise their child. There will be plenty of people walking around in the community with whooping cough - vaccinated or not! I do believe that some states have even pulled their free funding of Pertussis vaccine to family members as the cocooning effect wasn't proving to be effective.

    What about just not being so extreme?

    Perhaps you could explain to your friend how anxious you are, and ask that she stay away if there's any hint of illness in her or her children. My friend had a baby earlier this year and she was very anxious about baby getting sick and especially worried about whooping cough. We stayed away for weeks and weeks because we thought one of my children had chicken pox. We stayed away when we had sniffles. We absolutely respected her wishes and did not feel hurt by them.

    Good luck with how you decide to handle this.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Harriet View Post
    I don't wish to be argumentative, but I think the idea that all unvaccinated children are reservoirs of disease, is running rife in this thread. Which is simply not true. With regard to whooping cough in particular, many vaccinated kids get it and pass it on. Part of our transmission problem is that people "think"
    that because their child is vaccinated they won't get WC or dismiss a cough as WC and continue to socialise their child. There will be plenty of people walking around in the community with whooping cough - vaccinated or not! I do believe that some states have even pulled their free funding of Pertussis vaccine to family members as the cocooning effect wasn't proving to be effective.

    What about just not being so extreme?

    Perhaps you could explain to your friend how anxious you are, and ask that she stay away if there's any hint of illness in her or her children. My friend had a baby earlier this year and she was very anxious about baby getting sick and especially worried about whooping cough. We stayed away for weeks and weeks because we thought one of my children had chicken pox. We stayed away when we had sniffles. We absolutely respected her wishes and did not feel hurt by them.

    Good luck with how you decide to handle this.
    I really don't think most intelligent people who vax think they are completely covered .. Also I'm sure I would hope that we also know that vax kids can spread it .. Doesn't change the fact that herd ministry is crucial to control and keep at bay these diseases ... That is fact !!!

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    Default Have you been in this position?

    Quote Originally Posted by Harriet View Post
    I don't wish to be argumentative, but I think the idea that all unvaccinated children are reservoirs of disease, is running rife in this thread. Which is simply not true. With regard to whooping cough in particular, many vaccinated kids get it and pass it on. Part of our transmission problem is that people "think"
    that because their child is vaccinated they won't get WC or dismiss a cough as WC and continue to socialise their child. There will be plenty of people walking around in the community with whooping cough - vaccinated or not! I do believe that some states have even pulled their free funding of Pertussis vaccine to family members as the cocooning effect wasn't proving to be effective.

    What about just not being so extreme?

    Perhaps you could explain to your friend how anxious you are, and ask that she stay away if there's any hint of illness in her or her children. My friend had a baby earlier this year and she was very anxious about baby getting sick and especially worried about whooping cough. We stayed away for weeks and weeks because we thought one of my children had chicken pox. We stayed away when we had sniffles. We absolutely respected her wishes and did not feel hurt by them.

    Good luck with how you decide to handle this.
    Well written and I agree.

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    Default Re: Have you been in this position?

    Quote Originally Posted by Harriet View Post
    I don't wish to be argumentative, but I think the idea that all unvaccinated children are reservoirs of disease, is running rife in this thread. Which is simply not true. With regard to whooping cough in particular, many vaccinated kids get it and pass it on. Part of our transmission problem is that people "think"
    that because their child is vaccinated they won't get WC or dismiss a cough as WC and continue to socialise their child. There will be plenty of people walking around in the community with whooping cough - vaccinated or not! I do believe that some states have even pulled their free funding of Pertussis vaccine to family members as the cocooning effect wasn't proving to be effective.

    What about just not being so extreme?

    Perhaps you could explain to your friend how anxious you are, and ask that she stay away if there's any hint of illness in her or her children. My friend had a baby earlier this year and she was very anxious about baby getting sick and especially worried about whooping cough. We stayed away for weeks and weeks because we thought one of my children had chicken pox. We stayed away when we had sniffles. We absolutely respected her wishes and did not feel hurt by them.

    Good luck with how you decide to handle this.
    I know that vaxed people can still pass things on, but they have a lesser chance than someone that is not vaxed.
    Good on you for thinking that I'm acting extreme. My dd (and hopefully soon new bub) is the world to me and I never wanted to risk her wellbeing, if that's by asking people that aren't up to date to stay away from her as a newborn, then so be it. Obviously you can't shield a baby from everything, but that doesn't mean you have to just accept everyone's vaccination stance.
    I would ask ANYONE that isn't at optimal health to stay away from a newborn and probably even a child, that's just common courtesy on the sick person's behalf.

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    Default Have you been in this position?

    If she is really is your friend she will respect your wishes. If she doesn't then that says a lot more about her than you.

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    Default Have you been in this position?

    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    I would ask ANYONE that isn't at optimal health to stay away from a newborn and probably even a child, that's just common courtesy on the sick person's behalf.
    So would anyone, including non-vaxxers. Being vaccinated doesn't mean you are in optimal health and vice versa. Not sure why you would reach that conclusion.

    I'm sure all parents would keep themselves and their kids away from others when they have symptoms of being sick.

    I do think that not seeing a friend when she is perfectly healthy for six months is extreme. I'm not saying you are wrong - you are doing what you feel is best. But most people wouldn't do it which is why it could be considered extreme.

    Anyway OP let us know how you go with your friend.

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    Once again let's all stop vaccinating and see what happens???
    I am sure the anti vax who piggy back the vaxed would be panicking !! For people who chose not to vax for reasons that are not medical .. Do you think disease would come back and kill many if we all stopped vaxing ? Or should we just keeping washing our hands more ??

    sorry op for going off topic

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    Default Re: Have you been in this position?

    Quote Originally Posted by kw123 View Post
    So would anyone, including non-vaxxers. Being vaccinated doesn't mean you are in optimal health and vice versa. Not sure why you would reach that conclusion.

    I'm sure all parents would keep themselves and their kids away from others when they have symptoms of being sick.
    Unfortunately many people are not so thoughtful - I can't count the number of sick people who came around my son after he was born, and didnt tell me until after the fact. Still they think that there is nothing wrong with bringing their sick kids around my kids now... my youngest has a crappy immune system and a simple common cold sees him sick for weeks yet people still don't get it.

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