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  1. #1
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    Default 100% custody questions

    Hi all,

    My husband has to go back to court in the next couple of weeks as his ex is claiming that she is fighting for 100% custody of his 15 year old daughter. They have had a parenting consent order in place now for 7 years. The reason this is all happening is that his ex told child support that we don't have their daughter at all so my husband told them he does but not as per the consent order. The ex has told child support she is going for full custody as his daughter is too busy with work and school commitments to come and see us ever second weekend. We live 2 streets away from each other and we drop her to work and pick her up at least once a week on average. She has brainwashed her daughter to think the same.

    So I have a few questions that I need to know answers too. I'm hoping someone else has been through something similar.

    1. Can my husband still see his daughter if she gets full custody?
    2. Does anyone think she has any chance at getting full custody?
    3. What sort if things does he need to take to court?

    Hmmm sure there is more but I can't think right now as its a little overwhelming.

    TIA

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    She isnt going to get full custody. It's that simple.

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    No she won't get it.

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    OJandMe is offline I am the strength my children will have.
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    I'm kind of surprised it's even an issue at 15....

    At 15 you think she'd be freely moving between both houses after school and on weekends, especially as you're so close to each other.... It would be just like having two houses. Maybe she just wants more freedom to come and go as she feels comfortable.


    But no, your DH's ex won't get full custody.

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    If you have been having regular access with her until this then I doubt she would get 100%. It is not often given these days. Shared parental responsibility etc

    Does your DH have a lawyer?

    If it were me I would submit to court an affidavit supporting the access you already have eg with the dates you have been dropping her at work and the time you spend with her and what sort of things you do together.

    At 15 she will have a HUGE say in what she wants. In fact the court would be hard pressed to enforce a 15 year old to have an arrangement that she did not want. I think at 11 or maybe 13 the child's wishes are usually granted or given a lot of weight unless there is safety concerns.

    You could ask for a family report which then all of you including the 15 year old would be interviewed and that is then given to the court to assist the judge to make a decision.

    Have you tried mediation?

    At 15 I think you will find it hard to enforce anything really.

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    I'm kind of surprised it's even an issue at 15....

    At 15 you think she'd be freely moving between both houses after school and on weekends, especially as you're so close to each other.... It would be just like having two houses. Maybe she just wants more freedom to come and go as she feels comfortable.


    But no, your DH's ex won't get full custody.

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    Default 100% custody questions

    We tried mediation but weren't successful. All we wanted was the order that's in place to stand as it is, which is every second weekend and 2 weeks of school holidays.

    The ex puts guilt trips on her daughter every time she comes to us. Or will purposely sent her text about missing out on seeing friends that have popped in to see her or missing exciting things her mother is doing.

    My DH has been fighting to see his daughter for over 7 years now. He has always paid child support on time and the correct amount, he has helped with school uniforms books fees etc. We have included her in everything in our lives, wedding, 2 babies etc.

    So if you think that it's going to go on what step daughter wants then she will get full custody as the daughter doesn't want to have to see us. :-(

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    Default 100% custody questions

    She won't get it, it doesn't work like that and at 15 the court will likely respect the child's wishes.

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    Default 100% custody questions

    My concern is though that my stepdaughters wishes are that she doesn't want to come and see us.

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    Just as a side... most 15yr olds go through stages when they don't want to see their parents. I did at 15... but I don't think your Dh has anything to worry about, as long as he stays in her life, gives her a call every few days, drops her txt messages, invites her to things, offers to do the 'important stuff' like taking her shopping for 'that perfect dress' and paying for it...

    She's only 15, they have plenty of time to form a good solid relationship that has nothing to do with the mum.

    I did with my Dad. You might go through stages, but she'll always need a taxi, or a place to stay, or help with uni books, you can pay her to babysit (my Dad always paid me to babysit my much younger half-brother) We have a great relationship now, but there was a time at around 15 when I hated making the fortnight switch.

    When her Mum says "oh you just missed so and so" why can't your DSD just txt the friend and say "hey I'm at Dad's- come here!" ?

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