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  1. #71
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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Bunny Lover View Post
    I guess at the end of the day, we won't move. She moved 3 hours away from where they were both living (2 min walk from one another) .. Yes she had to move on with her life.. So we then followed her and didn't get much of a choice about where we were placed with work.. For DH, it was that or stay where he was and be unemployed for a significant amount of time. We moved to where we are now and bought a house and she moved AGAIN. So no, I can understand DHs reluctance especially as where we work is not very secure at the moment and our jobs are safe, for now. If he were to transfer etc he would more than likely be made redundant. We have a child together who is settled where he is in terms of who cares for him during work hours and moving closer to her would make me further from my family support who are already an hour away in the other direction.
    Well.....then.... There's your answer?
    If you're all settled make the best of the situation and make it work.
    It's obvious 50/50 won't happen due to distance etc.
    So get CS involved. Make sure all CS is up to date and being paid etc and organise some mediation to set out a parenting plan so your DH feels involved and has input into his sons schooling etc.

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  3. #72
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    Default Re: Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Cheerilee View Post
    Of course child support should be paid. They should stick to the court order if they can not come to a mutually agreeable scenario.

    Can the father not ask for mediation if he is not happy with the current arrangements? If they live too far away it can be done over the phone.
    Oh yeah right if only it were this easy.

    If mum wants to alienate the kids from Dad no court order or mediation will stop that.

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  5. #73
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    Quote Originally Posted by Happy2be3 View Post
    Oh yeah right if only it were this easy.

    If mum wants to alienate the kids from Dad no court order or mediation will stop that.
    Oh I know. It is not only mums who alienate children from fathers. Fathers can do a damm good job of it as well.

    I did not see my children for 9 months due to their father taking them. So I know this. I have been through family court hell for the last 18 months. I paid child support and legal bills. My children are now with me, I fought for them. He now pays no child support as he can't afford.

    At the end of the day it depends on how much you are willing to fight I guess.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bunny Lover View Post
    LMF, what proof do you think we would need? We have phoned and told them. They called her and confirmed it. They phoned DH back an said it was a "negligible amount". Thats not the point, shouldn't the assessment be accurate? Secondly, she has confirmed to us that she is "working a lot" and if she is working as much as she has described then wouldn't that take her above the self support amount? Most probably. They did a new assessment about a month ago as they had not received income information and the old assessment has expired so they did a provisional income which from what I understand was based on the average. She phoned them (I can only assume) and a further amended assessment arrives about a week later with her income back at $0. We don't know what else to do. We don't have any other proof.
    Well if you have anything in writing where she admitted to working a lot then get that to them, if you know where she works send that too them. Dont let them frustrate you to give up they like doing that remember CSA is a business they make money off all this. Keep on them if one person doesnt have the answers ask for a supervisor.

    Quote Originally Posted by faroutbrusselsprout View Post
    Well.....then.... There's your answer?
    If you're all settled make the best of the situation and make it work.
    It's obvious 50/50 won't happen due to distance etc.
    So get CS involved. Make sure all CS is up to date and being paid etc and organise some mediation to set out a parenting plan so your DH feels involved and has input into his sons schooling etc.
    No its not settled he is giving up which is what many men are forced to do then the women call them dead beats. He needs to keep fighting.

    Bunny can you try to get to mediation or ask the courts to make her move back, she cant legally just up and move like that so see if you can force her back to where she is closer. What she is doing is BS but so common just hope the laws change soon for people like your DH.

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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    I have not read all the replies but here is mine.

    Should it have to be paid no, if a woman wants to alienate the father from the childs life then she should alienate his money too. That doesnt happen though in this country which is sad. All the laws make it more financially beneficial to keep dad away. GOod new though that they are looking at possibly changing the laws to be no visit no support but we will see how the politicians work that around. The CSA laws are flawed here and there are a lot of groups working to get them to work for the child. Having a child should not then destroy the chance of living a normal life after you and the parent split but here it does make it very hard to financially move on.

    Lets hope these new laws come into effect soon.
    That's a great idea, no visit, no support (sarcasm). Another way to reward violent parents or deadbeats and punish custodial parents who are trying to protect their kids. My ex only sees child every 6 months or so by HIS choice. We went to mediation and I asked for more frequent visits since child didn't know who he was. I know for a fact that I am being labeled a ***** among other things for 'taking' the child away from father and keeping them apart.
    Also do you want to provide facts and references for these so called changes to CS? Because you obviously don't know anything about CSA in Australia or family law here

  8. #76
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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by ItWasntMe View Post
    That's a great idea, no visit, no support (sarcasm). Another way to reward violent parents or deadbeats and punish custodial parents who are trying to protect their kids. My ex only sees child every 6 months or so by HIS choice. We went to mediation and I asked for more frequent visits since child didn't know who he was. I know for a fact that I am being labeled a ***** among other things for 'taking' the child away from father and keeping them apart.
    Also do you want to provide facts and references for these so called changes to CS? Because you obviously don't know anything about CSA in Australia or family law here
    Don't stress.
    It's rubbish.
    CS is about the child and making sure the child is financially supported. It will never ever in a trillion years be about settling the score between two bitter parents who can't put their differences aside.
    Can you imagine the uproar if such a "law" existed?!? Who misses out? The child! Never.going.to.happen.

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  10. #77
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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    Well if you have anything in writing where she admitted to working a lot then get that to them, if you know where she works send that too them. Dont let them frustrate you to give up they like doing that remember CSA is a business they make money off all this. Keep on them if one person doesnt have the answers ask for a supervisor.
    If they had it in writing, don't you thing they would have already given it to CSA? It can be tricky to prove other parent is doing cash in hand work. My ex in his stupidity told me during conversation where he was working cash in hand, hours he was doing etc. CSA didn't do a damn thing about it even after I gave them photographic evidence from exes fb about his cash in hand and bragging about 'beating the system'

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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by faroutbrusselsprout View Post
    Don't stress.
    It's rubbish.
    CS is about the child and making sure the child is financially supported. It will never ever in a trillion years be about settling the score between two bitter parents who can't put their differences aside.
    Can you imagine the uproar if such a "law" existed?!? Who misses out? The child! Never.going.to.happen.
    Yep. I would love to be working full time atm. Unfortunately with a special needs child who doesn't cope with even 5hrs of childcare a week, it is currently impossible. I would love to tell my ex where to stick his money as well but it is needed for specialists.

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    HugsBunny is offline Once upon a time there was a bunny.........
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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    remember CSA is a business they make money off all this. Keep on them if one person doesnt have the answers ask for a supervisor.
    Oh what a load of rot!!! CSA is now a money making scheme?? Are you serious?!!!

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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by ItWasntMe View Post
    Yep. I would love to be working full time atm. Unfortunately with a special needs child who doesn't cope with even 5hrs of childcare a week, it is currently impossible. I would love to tell my ex where to stick his money as well but it is needed for specialists.
    Exactly! Money.is.for.the.child! Not tit for tat visits = pay. My blood boils at the thought.


 
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