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  1. #91
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    Default Re: Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by HugsBunny View Post
    The court didn't decide that because it was unfair on the mother though Happy2b3, they decided it because of the impact it would have had on the child.

    Isn't it a good thing that the children are who the courts care about?? Would it really have been better for the child had she been uprooted from what she was settled in to?? How upsetting for the child.
    Not to mention it is about time the court realised it is NOT on the best interest of the child to keep the mum and dad in seperate states. Mum committed ab offense, she can't be held accountable unless she comes back to this state, she took the child,.....THAT is not in the best interest of the child.

    In my husbands case, court failed his daughter. As a result the cycle continues (ex was from a single mum family, now so is his daughter)

  2. #92
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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Happy2be3 View Post
    The mother uprooted her in the first place!
    Yes and she had settled in again. Should the child really be paid to pay for the mothers actions??

    I'm in the opposite boat btw, I moved WITH MY XHs CONSENT though because it wasn't in writing, I couldn't prove it. I was ordered back pending a final hearing which XH up and dropped three months later and finally put on paper that we could move. My 7yo has changed schools three times this year because of a vindictive father with his own agenda. My 7yo is about to enter counseling to help him deal with being pulled backwards and forwards.

    Let me tell you, as far as you step daughter is concerned, the courts got it right. I wouldn't wish what my boys going through on ANYONE.

    Your step daughter would have been from a single mum family regardless of what the courts decided or whether the mum moved interstate or not because your husband and the mother had separated. The mother moving would not have changed the 'label' on her family.
    Last edited by HugsBunny; 17-11-2012 at 22:11.

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  4. #93
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    Quote Originally Posted by Happy2be3 View Post
    Well, I'm sure my husband would take great offense to this. He fought tooth and nail, but it was too late. Ex had abducted daughter without his knowing to another state, by the time he managed to find them it was 2 years later... Daughter was already "settled" in day care.... Court decided it was "unfair" to uproot her and move back....

    It was unfair for the mother to uproot her in the first place and kidnap her away from all family and friends but the judge didn't care about that.

    As a result my husband has to pay ALL Costs associated with travelling to another state, all child support costs and barely sees his daughter a few times a year.
    I am sorry this happened to your husband. Maybe the way I worded the last sentence of my post was not the best. Family Court is not fair to anyone. For everyone who "wins" someone "loses".

    I too paid for legal costs, child support and transporting my children too and from another state for visits each holidays. In the end I moved to the state where my children are and I ended up getting majority care. I am not saying he should do this I am saying what I did.

    But it is not just mothers who alienate and denigrate it is fathers as well. The people most affected are the children who never asked for these situations in the first place.

    I know when I was paying huge amounts of travel expenses I got the amount of child support I had to pay reduced as the amount it was costing to see my children were over a certain percent of my income.

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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Happy2be3 View Post
    Not to mention it is about time the court realised it is NOT on the best interest of the child to keep the mum and dad in seperate states. Mum committed ab offense, she can't be held accountable unless she comes back to this state, she took the child,.....THAT is not in the best interest of the child.

    In my husbands case, court failed his daughter. As a result the cycle continues (ex was from a single mum family, now so is his daughter)
    She would have been part of a single parent family anyway, moving or not. Quite frankly, children would prefer to be from a broken home then in one. I am also from a single mother and am doing extremely well by myself. I was more concerned for myself that my mother was in abusive relationship with my father and I was in one with ex rather then being a single parent.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ourbradybunch View Post
    If it was you in a blended family with other children would you move to follow your husbands ex around knowing full well that in a yrs time she would move away again just to spite your husband who then apparently should move again all because that's what he should do to see his child
    I'd never be a step-mother.

    I am far too selfish to ever be in that position.

    -inb4 get out of my section-

    As previously stated, my father moved cities 3 times following us, he threw away relationships, career opportunities. Yes, my mother was horrible for doing it, but he did what he had to. We were there before those relationships and opportunities and we were dependent on him for our well being.

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    Default Re: Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by HugsBunny View Post
    The court didn't decide that because it was unfair on the mother though Happy2b3, they decided it because of the impact it would have had on the child.

    Isn't it a good thing that the children are who the courts care about?? Would it really have been better for the child had she been uprooted from what she was settled in to?? How upsetting for the child.
    Not to mention it is about time the court realised it is NOT on the best interest of the child to keep the mum and dad in seperate states. Mum committed ab offense, she can't be held accountable unless she comes back to this state, she took the child,.....THAT is not in the best interest of the child.

    In my husbands case, court failed his daughter. As a result the cycle continues (ex was from a single mum family, now so is his daughter)

  9. #97
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    Default Re: Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by ItWasntMe View Post
    She would have been part of a single parent family anyway, moving or not. Quite frankly, children would prefer to be from a broken home then in one. I am also from a single mother and am doing extremely well by myself. I was more concerned for myself that my mother was in abusive relationship with my father and I was in one with ex rather then being a single parent.
    They weren't separated. She just up and left. Left her job (with out telling them), left friends.

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    Default Re: Child support

    Why is it SO hard for some of you to believe that yes in some cases mothers do not do what is best for the child.

    I give up. Trying to dicuss Fathers rights around here is pointless. The way you all carry on, a mother can do whatever she wants... But as long as it's in the child's best interests blah blah blah


    Having a Dad IS in the best interest. We have too many broken homes in this country.

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  12. #99
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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Happy2be3 View Post
    They weren't separated. She just up and left. Left her job (with out telling them), left friends.
    Sounds like they would have separated eventually though if she felt the need to run to another state.

    Look, I'm not saying what she did was right or that it isn't horrible that your husband had to deal with that, but I stand by my previous statement - I think the court got it right by not uprooting the child again.

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    Default Child support

    Quote Originally Posted by Happy2be3 View Post
    Having a Dad IS in the best interest. We have too many broken homes in this country.
    Hang on, so you think that people should be miserable in an I happy relationship/ situation, teaching the kids that its ok to put up with being unhappy, JUST so that the kids aren't from a broken home?????

    Can I just point out that by your rationale, had the mother NOT up and left your husband, he wouldn't now be YOUR husband!! He would be hers!

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