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    Default "spin off" were you spoilt as a child

    And has it effected your adult life?
    Just reading the Xmas thread and thought that we as kids did get a lot of presents but I don't think it has effected us as such? Don't get me wrong I'm still pretty high maintenance and want what i want but I've worked really hard to get what I want ( as have my brother and sister) i think from watching mum and dad working - DH had an average present haul as a kid and he as an adult wants to buy everything !

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    Default "spin off" were you spoilt as a child

    I think it does. A brother and sister very close to me were raised not wanting for anything. As a result now as 30+ year old adults, if they don't get what they want when they want they go into meltdown tantrum mode. It's quite ridiculous but it's true. I want to teach my daughter that she won't go without but she can't always have everything she wants.

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    I'm more like your DH. We weren't spoilt as kids but i want to buy my kids everything and honestly do spend way too much on them at times.

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    London is offline “I think we're losing our sense of humor instead of being able to relax and laugh at ourselves" - Betty White
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    My brother and I were spoilt as kids. Always had a massive haul of stuff for Christmas and although it wasnt all expensive stuff, it was all stuff we wanted.

    Then when my parents split (I was 6, brother was 9) we noticed a trend in presents from our dad. Our dad would buy us heaps of little cheap junky things...he always said the fun in Christmas is opening presents and not knowing what they are..............where as my mum would spend the same amount on us both and get us the one thing we wanted and then any cash that was left over. To this day mum still does that......every year we get a present worth $200 for Christmas....if our present comes to $150 then we either get $50 extra or another present worth $50. Its just the way she does things. Meanwhile, up until last year, my dad continued the tradition of buying small junky things.....was all crap Id rather not have. One year I told him Id NEVER use an epilator and I got one from him....along with plain printer paper

    Now as a mum myself, I want DS to have lots of little things to open but have them all be stuff he wants or would be useful. Santa ALWAYS gets him the one thing he asks Santa for (he asks for something cheap from Santa ) and then DP and I spoil him with gifts depending on how much money we have at the time.


    ETA: Kind of went off on a tangent and didnt answer your question Im not sure if its affected me as an adult. If someone is buying me junky stuff for the sake of it, Id rather not have it. Like when someone goes to Bali and feels the need to buy you something so you get a coconut purse or a tacky material wallet (yes Ive received both)....while I appreciate the gesture. Id rather them not give me anything than waste money on stuff I will never use. Im used to not getting what I want though, and can easily put aside my wants....and I get really appreciative when I am either given or able to buy something I really do want.
    Last edited by London; 17-11-2012 at 10:41.

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    Yes my brother and sister and I were very spoiled. It has not affected my life as an adult, I do like nice things and want all the new gadgets but one thing my mom taught me is to always work for what you want dont rely on other people to give you things, if you want more than you can afford then get a second job or save up for it, and be proud of what you have earned in life even if its not a lot. Me getting everything I wanted as a child has not let me to be a bad adult.

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    We were well supplied and got good christmas gifts, but not to excess. Outside of christmas and birthdays, mum would make us work for it but always met us halfway or better. If I wanted something, she would put the lay by deposit down for me, I would give her money from odd jobs, cleaning at dad's business etc and then she would make the payments on the layby for me, and match what I paid.

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    LifeInShadesOfGrey is offline Just a little bit silly :)
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    Default "spin off" were you spoilt as a child

    We didn't have much money at all growing up. It was often one present for Christmas and birthday and always little.

    I think that affected me in a sense of when I became an adult and had money, I would just spend the lot. Buy what ever I wanted (I had a very good job at 18-19, owned 4 cars but wasted every cent and nothing to show for it now except my now wise knowledge of money)

    Then a few years ago a switch flicked and now I save any money we get and not waste it. I hardly buy a thing for my self. My tattered wardrobe says that. But I use my money to buy everything DD needs and make a fuss at Chrissy and her birthday.

    So not being spoilt can affect you In The same way people think being spoilt can too.

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    Default "spin off" were you spoilt as a child

    My step brother and sister were spoilt rotten, not just at Christmas but all the time whereas my sister and I weren't.

    They are now 18 and 23 and still have no concept of money, work ethics and still expect hand outs.

    I think there's a big difference between spoiling your child at things like Christmas though and just giving them what they want all the time.

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    Default "spin off" were you spoilt as a child

    My DH was a spoilt, self entitled brat. He's parents threw money and the latest "stuff" at him instead of quality time and love.
    He had all the latest gadgets and ate his dinner in his room in front of the latest TV.
    He has absolutely been affected. He still can be a spoilt brat and until he met me, couldn't understand why he couldn't have something just because he wanted it.
    His mum died years ago. And his Dad is a lonely old alcoholic with not a penny to his name....

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    Absolutely not. I got clothes for xmas and one little toy maybe. I never got 'just because' presents. When I was bought bare necessities I was told by my mother how 'lucky' I was. Although I will say it's made me the person I am today; happy with little..

    I try to go a middle ground with my kids - not overly spoilt so they don't appreciate, and not like I was, where I had nothing. I remember crying one year at xmas, I was maybe 8 or 9? my bestie had got an early present of a bike and while I knew I wouldn't get anything like that, I thought please, don't let it be all clothes again (which incidentally was my summer wardrobe of maybe 3 pairs of shorts and 3 tops) So I opened my presents on xmas day..... and it was all clothes again, ugly clothes, and I went to my room and had a little cry. I was not a spoiled child having a tantrum. Just a normal kid that wanted something even remotely fun at xmas.

    So I buy the kids 'just because presents' sometimes. It may only be worth $10. I still want my kids to be humble and well grounded. But as I said, there is a middle ground and I'm trying to find it.
    Last edited by delirium; 17-11-2012 at 10:48.

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to delirium For This Useful Post:

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