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  1. #11
    OJandMe's Avatar
    OJandMe is offline I am the strength my children will have.
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Perhaps she knows all this and thats why she's giving you the silent treatment? Jelously combined with judgement is enough to make someone give the cold treatment.

    Could she have overhead you talking about her? Could a third party you have whinged to, passed it on to your sister?
    No I don't think that is the case.

    I don't say anything about her to people IRL. That's not fair. I don't believe in gossip. We've had our spats...

    I think she's peeved at me because of the other things happening surrounding my DH not getting on with the rest of my family. (I'm the white sheep) And she's been a real ***** to him, me and our kids about it, because he's not willing to put up with her behaviour anymore.

    She called him some horrible names behind his back, and then I had my father saying things like "Oh we all really like (DH)" so I said, well you can't say that because sis has made "these comments" only recently to me about DH. And my father was pretty upset about some of the comments she made...

    So whether my father has said something to her about them, and she's decided to give me the flick.. or whatever I don't know.

    But it hurts because I basically raised her and now she's cutting me out! (messy messy family divorce)

    *sigh*

    I don't envy her having a house, they are in a completely different position to us, she only has one child, at school, no childcare costs- he works FIFO and she has got her first full-time job.

    There's just a lot going on my my life right now around work and housing and feeling unstable which isn't helping my stress levels.

    I'm the only one of my sisters in Qld who doesn't have a house. (yes I'm also the only one with 3 kids still at home...) so I KNOW I need to just take a step back...

    But I can't vent anywhere else...

    so sorry everyone. I'm using here to just kind of write it all out.

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    Default Feeling down... stupid things.

    Hugs OJ it's awful when a sibling decides to ignore you and you have no idea why.

    I have two brothers, my older one passed away about 11 years ago and since then my younger brother has gone a bit mental. He does stupid things and makes awful choices in partners then has kids with them. In the last 11 years we've been through many times where we haven't spoken for months on end usually because of an awful girlfriend. Funny thing is he breaks up with them eventually and realises how badly he treats me and my parents.

    It doesn't always last for long, usually until he gets back with the partner.

    Unfortunately I just have had to choose to have very little to do with him because his behaviour is so destructive and stressful.

    I'm sure my older brother would be turning over in his grave to see him carrying on as he does.

    I guess I'm trying to say that sometimes you just have to cut your losses and move on. Your situation sounds really stressful and your sister is only making it worse. I truly hope you can either make peace with her or move on for your own sanity.

    Good luck xx

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    Default Feeling down... stupid things.

    Vent away!

    I wouldnt tolerate anyone bad mouthing my DH either. Hopefully your sister will get over it soon.

    Your priority is your kids and you have 3 still at home. Give yourself a break, a house will come in time, your kids are your now

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    Default Re: Feeling down... stupid things.

    Dont be bummed.

    I try and focus on what i *do* have rather than what i dont.

    At least you have a nice roof over your head....so many dont or live in less than desireable places ( esp in other countries)

    Not trying to be condescending. I feel it works for me to just be thankful rather than jealous ( it is hard i know!)

    Have u outright asked your sister why she isnt speaking to you?

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    Default Re: Feeling down... stupid things.

    I feel like this re:house sometomes too.. but I also have 3 kids under 6 and hubby only just went on full time at a relatively low wage this yr. We havnt had the chance haha! When my kids are old enough for me to feel comfortable working.. well see then!

    as for your sister sorry to hear!! It sucks when family fights! Hope you feel settled soon and can start seeing the savings pile up

    What is Fifo?

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    FIFO .fly in fly out

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    i know this feeling totally.. except my sister just brought her second house and wouldnt even rent me her first house, although we talk, we just live in totally seperate worlds and have nothing in common. but i admit it, im sooo totally jealous.

    ps she is also 2 yrs younger than me.
    Last edited by mumofgremlins; 15-11-2012 at 20:56.

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    I'm really sorry Gretel. I know how it feels to see someone getting all the things you want (and often SO EASILY too... and sometimes they don't even appreciate them like you would... or they didn't even WANT THEM for as long as you have...etc)... it can really get you down and it always makes me feel like the universe is trying to break me.

    *hugs*

    Just letting you know you have my sympathies, and I can relate too.

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    OJandMe  (15-11-2012)

  11. #19
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    OJandMe is offline I am the strength my children will have.
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    Thanks guys.

    Wow it's actually really nice to be able to write it out and not have to over explain everything.

    I tried talking to DH about things this morning and he completely missed the whole point of what I was saying and ended up turning it all around to say my stressing about things was driving him insane.

    But then he came around when he was at school and sent me a message saying to make a list of everything that was stressing me and together we'd work on them one by one. So I'm feeling much better this evening.


 

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