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  1. #1
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    Default Opinions about DOCs reports

    Hi!

    A friend of mine is going through a nasty separation/divorce. During the process her lawyer has suppoened DOCS reports about her exes new gf's children (make sense?). Anyway most of the DOCS reports are mandatory reports (teachers, school counsellor, police) and there are a few from neighbours and family friends. Most of the issues are about inappropriate sexual behaviours of one of the eldest children (to the gf's 1st husband. She has 2 ex husbands- no judgement just makes this story easier to understand). These reports have been accumulating since 2006 and have not been investigated ???). Anyway my mate has asked for my opinion about whether she should share this information with the first ex husband. The eldest child has gone to live with the dad as she has been self harming and does not feel comfortable living with her mother and her new boyfriend. (Still with me?). The 2nd eldest is still there and this is the child that there are the most concerns about.

    I can not offer a non biased opinion and said I would post on here and see what most parents would say about her telling the father. She doesn't know him, knows nothing about him, feels scared to call him (she found the number) but thinks he should know. She also is worried about being perceived as a trouble maker.

    What do you think?

  2. #2
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    It is my understanding that all information gotten through a subpoena is confidential between the parties and their lawyers. The other party would also have access to this information.

    We were told that anything gotten through subpoena we had to keep to ourselves. She should ask her lawyer.

    As for not investigating I don't know depends if it is multiple reports about the one incident or many separate incidents it would also have in the information reasons for not investigating.

    Be careful what you say on here about subpoenaed information.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheerilee View Post
    It is my understanding that all information gotten through a subpoena is confidential between the parties and their lawyers. The other party would also have access to this information.

    We were told that anything gotten through subpoena we had to keep to ourselves. She should ask her lawyer.

    As for not investigating I don't know depends if it is multiple reports about the one incident or many separate incidents it would also have in the information reasons for not investigating.

    Be careful what you say on here about subpoenaed information.
    I should have clarified- she means to tell the husband that there are numerous docs reports about numerous incidents rather than give him the specific information. If he is concerned about his children he then has the option of following up for himself.

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    Default Opinions about DOCs reports

    No, I don't think she should. It's not really any of her business. She herself has the right to know about it, as it could potentially affect her own children....but it's certainly not her place to be passing this info on, especially to a person who she does not even know.....and who could possibly even be the cause of this child's behaviour. It's really safest for her to not get herself involved.

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    Default Opinions about DOCs reports

    Wouldn't the father already know about all the DOCS reports? I assume the mother knows?

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    Default Re: Opinions about DOCs reports

    If its a docs report concerning your child the parents are told about it unless there is a reason to not be. There were some made in regards to my step daughter and my husband was called and told about it by both docs and police. He then had a look at what had been said and spoke to the police and made his own judgement on it all. I'm a bit lost with your story though so may be mis interpreting it.

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    My understanding is that when a report is made it is then followed up with both of the parents, not just the 'lives with' parent. So he would most likely already know that reports have been made.

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    She should prob mind her own business, the reports maybe were followed up on and found to be unfounded, why even consider starting drama when you dont know the whole story?


 

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