DS is nearly 2 and has self-settled quite a few times over the last few months, it was just a natural progression and we never did any form of CC at all.
Up to 14 months he was awful and took hours to get to sleep (often 5+ hours of feeding, rocking, patting, etc) but he had silent reflux till 8 months and then at 14 months we cut tomatoes out of his diet and he started sleeping through - previously he would be awake for 3 hours in a row at night.
When he was in his cot, I would cuddle him to sleep for his day sleep, then for his night sleep I would feed him to sleep - and he was sleeping through despite being fed to sleep. Then he weaned at 16 months and we just cuddled him in the chair - it would still take a long time (up to two hours) sometimes though.
At 18 months he moved to a single bed and we lie down next to him and tell him stories or run his back till he goes to sleep. Sometimes it still takes hours, especially at night, but it's not too bad as he is happy for us to leave him alone for a few minutes at a time, and sometimes we will say we are going to be back in a few minutes and he falls asleep by himself. He is definitely moving towards self-settling but I honestly really treasure my "big mummy cuddles" at sleep time now. I never used to, I used to find it a massive burden but now he doesn't need me so much during the day it's nice to have some special time at the end of the day.
My DD is 6 months and she self settles. We did not do CC and we do not follow any day routine as such. She loves going to bed. We do bath, read a story and feed at night and she watches her singing seahorse and usually goes asleep during the song or shortly afterwards.
We just started small when he was about 15 mnths. I would give him his bottle in my arms and while stil drinking it, is put him into the cot, leave the side down, lean over it and comfort him. then I would pick him up and rock him to sleep beside it..
Gradually I started to leave him in his cot longer after the bottle talking calmly to him, patting his back etc, whatever it took.
If he got upset I would pick him up, calm him down and try again. Initially each sleep would take quite a while to get him down, repeatedly in and out of the cot, but I can not handle him crying.... I haven't read parenting books, this its what worked for me...however I am an ex childcare worker (qualified) but am now a sahm.
The child health clinics can refer you to an all day sleep school.
They follow the 'safe sleep space' routines.
Similar to save our sleep but not as harsh. They try to set a routine and encourage other settling techniques apart from picking up. They shoosh, rock in crib, pat mattress or nappy etc.
Every baby is different, my baby doesn't completely conform BUT going to the sleep school has helped me alot.
My baby gets hysterical very quickly so save our sleep would only be torture for my bub. This is a lot easier. Doesn't always work, but my baby has gone from sleeping if im lucky 15-20minutes during the day to actually going 2hours!! We are still working on it but its an amazing difference
If this sounds worth it for you, you can get a referal to sleep school or you should be able to buy safe sleep space at the bookstore or you can also hire from library. Comes with book and DVD
Last edited by Ahpez; 11-11-2012 at 10:49.
My bub is also 3.5months
I like safe sleep space as being a sensible place between "no cry" and "controlled crying"
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Yeah I think so too.
They encourage shooshung etc for little winges or little cries but don't allow the loud or high cries. We have to pick up a lot but getting so much better
Tizzie Hall gets a really bad wrap for her methods. I too didn't think much of her when I heard about her from people in forums, but I got desperate and bought her book and much of what she says makes a lot of sense.
I understand it doesn't work for every baby or fit with every person's parenting style, but I do think it's well worth a read so OP, it can't hurt to have a read and see if you think it will work for you.
Some facts about the book that people don't understand:
1. Tizzie has a brother who died of SIDS, so there is nothing in her book that would put a baby at risk. The 7 layers is actually very thin layers of bamboo or cotton blankets. They are breathable fabrics and if tucked in properly will not put a baby at risk. They aren't thick wooly blankets or polyster blankets that don't breathe.
The layers actually equate to how we as adults sleep, but slightly less as babies can't control their temperature as adults. As adults we generally have 15 TOGS worth in what we wear to bed with a sheet and a quilt and quilt cover (think about it a quilt cover and a sheet is already 3 layers) As the sheets you put on your baby as suggested in the book are layered if it gets hotter in the night you can remove she sheets or add them as you need. You can buy her guide online (or I can send it to me - PM me if you want) and it factors in what the temperature is in the room, the TOG of the sleeping bag, what the baby is wearing and the type of climate you are in. It's definitely not a one size fits all approach.
2. Everyone says that she doesn't have kids of her own so isn't qualified to write. Well she actually started helping parents when she was 9 years old and learnt a lot in the time from then until she had kids of her own. She also learnt a lot when she had kids of her own, her books have been updated - so don't believe it when people say she's not qualified to write as she doesn't have kids - she DOES!
3. She doesn't advocate Cry It Out which is leaving a baby to cry until it falls asleep no matter how long that is. It also isn't controlled crying when you go in at set intervals and leave again until they sleep. She actually gives ONE interval time depending on the age of the baby. If the baby doesn't self settle in that time, you go into the baby and sit there with them, you are by their side as you pat their belly or rock them to sleep, you do what ever it takes to get them to sleep without leaving them to cry again. You do this for another set amount of time and if it doesn't work. You get your baby up and try it all again 10 minutes later. As they get older, the one interval time you use does get longer yes, but the earlier you start it, the quicker they will learn to self settle and you won't need to leave them for too long ultimately.
OP as your baby was prem, I'm unsure of what point it would work to use the Tizzie Hall routines and methods (I assume there are no lasting medical issues from being born prem - if there is -ignore Tizzie - it only works for healthy babies), but if you find you get the point where you are exhausted with what you are doing, or you want to change things, please give this book some consideration. If how I've described her book sounds like it doesn't fit with your parenting style, please ignore this book, but I wanted to give you a realistic view of what this book is all about before you write it off as a possible source of help for you.
Good luck with everything and enjoy every moment with your bub!
Over my dead body.
I would not recommend this book to my worst enemy.
OP. We fed dd1 to sleep till I weaned at 19mths. We never had any probs at all
Now we cuddle to sleep for naps and bedtime. Takes 5-15min on avg. If she is really upset or too wired I take her for a walk in the pram and she usually passes out in there soon after. Either she stays sleeping in there or we transfer her to her bed. Middle of the night wake ups are resettled in her bed or we take her to ours.
Dd2 is 5mths and is being fed to sleep but I remove the boob whilst drowsy and then pat her to sleep in her cot. She will also sleep in the car, pram and carrier.
Last edited by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah; 11-11-2012 at 11:20.
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