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  1. #1
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    Default How to manage a toddler (wakes constantly) and newborn

    As the title suggests I have a toddler who is a shocking sleeper. She sleeps through every now and then and will sometimes do 9 or so nights in a row and then we are back to months of her waking 3+ times a night. I am currently 6.5 months pregnant with our second. My toddler will be 23 months when the baby is born and I am soooo worried about how I will manage getting up with a newborn and a toddler all night long. My toddler will not go to my husband at night and I will be breastfeeding the newborn. I am starting to think I will need to have a mattress on the floor with the toddler on one side and the newborn on the other (really not what I want to do). Please help

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    Hi there
    sorry I don't have any solutions, but I wanted to subscribe. I'm 6 weeks pg and my 26 month old still wakes every night at least once and I usually have to get into his bed with him so he'll sleep for the rest of the night. He is a little bit older than your daughter and I have a lot longer before a newborn arrives in our house so I'm *trying* to work on his sleep associations in the meantime so hopefully he'll sleep a bit better in a few months time

    good luck. I've found co-sleeping has been a good option to help everyone get more sleep.

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    I have a newborn 3 weeks old and a toddler 20 months. We have a mattress in my toddlers room and DH sleeps in there for the time being. DS used to only want me as well, i pretty much do everything, bath him, feed him and put him to sleep etc but 1 month before i was due i got DH to do all of it. DS was not happy about it! But after a while he got used to it. DS wakes up twice at night, not fully awake though and goes back to sleep quite quickly. What techniques have you tried to helo him sleep through the night?
    My newborn sleeps a lot during the day and is awake a lot at night. Surprisingly she doesnt wake DS up with her whinging! And DS doesnt wake DD up with his screaming!
    But i have to say the past 3 weeks has been tough and i felt like i have had no sleep at all! But am getting used to being sleep deprived!

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    Electric Boogaloo, we also have co slept with DD and I am generally in with her every night somewhere between 2 -4am because I am so exhausted with being up numerous times before, some of those times for an hour or more. I find everytime I attempt to leave she wakes and and cries.
    Tubstar, I have slept in her room on a mattress (when she was in a cot), now she is in a big bed I find I end up sleeping with her by the early hours. Earlier in the night we can just ssshh her and she will go back to sleep. We have co-slept in the past too. Before I moved her into a big bed she was finally at the stage of putting herself to sleep as I could just walk out. Now that she has moved rooms and beds I am sitting on the floor in her room until she is asleep. I am gradually aiming to sit in the hallway and then be able to just walk out. It takes ages to change routines with her and I don't mind the gradual approach. I just don't know why she sleeps through occasionally and then other times it is a nightmare.

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    Hi, just wanted to share our experience. Our 3yr DD initially slept well as a baby, however since 12 months sleeping proggresively got worse to a point that she was waking at least 3-4 times a night, up to 7-8 times on a bad night. After 2 years of continual sleep deprevation, we got a referral to a pediatrician sleep specialist, and did a sleep study - overnight stay in hosp with DD hooked up to all sorts of sensors. Turned out no big issues but her sleep patterns weren't smooth like normal, so she was waking while transitioning between light & deep sleep. She has been prescribed medication and doing much better. Maybe, like us, you should see a sleep specialist? I wish we did it heaps earlier. Hope this helps, Kimba

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    Thanks for your posts ladies. Anyone else out there with some advice?

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    RoseKathleen is offline ...Yes - motherhood is a full-time job!
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    I think you need to explore more of WHY your toddler is waking. It is NOT normal IMO. And you need to get it sorted before the baby is born. Co-sleeping is not a "solution". You need to get your sleep ready for the baby.

    What does your toddler do when she wakes? Scream? (ie does she have night terrors?) Call out to you? (ie does she need to learn to self settle?)

    Is she waking to use the loo? Cut out drinks after 5pm.

    Is there a noise waking her? My neighbours like to empty their bins after midnight!

    Is she scared of the dark? Invest in a night light.

    Is she just looking for attention? You need to get TOUGH and get her to stay in bed.

    I recently watched a documentary where everytime the woman's 3yr old woke she got a cuddle from mummy and mummy carried her back to bed, fluffed the pillow, did the blankets, etc. Mum just needed to learn to get tough - pick up the child, put her back in the bed, turn off the light and walk away.

    My DS was a shocking sleeper as a baby. (The good news is the DD slept thru the night from 5 weeks!!). I had to get tough - controlled crying (or a form of it anyway), and NOT GIVING IN!! I consulted a baby sleep specialist who promised me that he would sleep through in 3-4 nights of the program - 7 if he was stubborn. I had 3 nights of HELL, then gradual success. He slept through the night 3 weeks later. Getting tough does work - but both you and DH need to do it, and continuously. With me I found that by writing down the "rules" on a paper it helped me remember in the middle of the night when I was sleep deprived, and DH could be reminded when he got off track. Having two parents doing the same thing and being on the same page is wonderful!!

    Good luck!

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    We had the same problem. Thankfully the baby is a champion sleeper which is awesome. Our toddler still doesn't sleep through in his own bed.

    The best way we've dealt with it: let him sleep in our bed, then he sleeps the entire night. We still put him to sleep in his bed but if he wakes he just comes into our room himself.

    Not the ideal solution but everyone gets a good nights sleep.

    Good luck with no 2 hope u get a good sleeper

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    Default How to manage a toddler (wakes constantly) and newborn

    We have a 27mth old and 5mth old. The toddler was sleeping thru 8/10 times a night but had a massive sleep regression when dd2 was born. Then she got sick. Then dd2 got hospitalized and I was away for 2wks. DH became the favoured parent then.

    Dd1 was waking more often than dd2 at one point. But it's ok. Dd2 is side car next to my bed. Dd1 is in the middle. and it's getting better. She starts in her bed and is resettled in there by DH till she only wants me and then we co sleep. but as DH works night shift I will co sleep from the beginning.

    I don't think Cc or CIO will sort out the separation anxiety. And co sleeping is normal and accepted practice in all non western countries. So you are parenting in a way that most of the world does numbers wise

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