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  1. #31
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    Default do you like having visitors at your house?

    Not really. Maybe I'm just anti-social? Lol. I just feel like my house is my own private domain, and I hate people intruding on it. Lol. That said, my best friend comes over for sleepovers occasionally and I actually enjoy that!

    I think that's one area where me and DF are going to have some clashes. He's a really social person and likes having mates over. He invited a friend over without consulting or even telling me last week, I got back home and his mate was there. I was a little annoyed to be honest, as I just wanted a quiet night, without having to entertain others or try to force conversation.

  2. #32
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    For those that it causes a little tension with partners, we had the same problem, until I explained WHY it stresses me out so much.

    I think maybe he was worried it was because I didn't like his family/friends, so when I explained I don't like surprise visits at all and that I find it really anxious and stressful I think he understood a little more. Especially as his family is big-ish compared to mine, so having the family over (and it's always the WHOLE gang at once) is instantly 7 adults and three kids visiting (in addition to us). The breaking point was when his family decided (without running it by us first) that they were all going to come around to our place for an improptu dinner party in a couple of hours (they bring the food so they thought that would be ok) I just about pooped my pants.

    I know lots of people love spontaneous and find it really exciting but I just can not handle it at all. I love routine and I feel very uneasy when things change at the last minute.

    We've come to a compromise, so occasionally I have to put my big girl pants on and entertain the gang at our house (maybe once every 6 months). We usually have a bbq/pizza night/curry night or something like that outside (avoiding needing the house to be quite so spotless and also keeping crazy playtime outside) and in return DH has told family that they should call before they come over.

    DH is also so sweet and also does all the work for the dinners ( I feel guilty about this!), so it's usually after work for me, I come home, house clean, food ready to go. Much more manageable stress-wise, and much easier for me to agree to more regular events. Hopefully with time I will be able to help out with cooking and cleaning in the lead up. I'm also learning to relax around his family and interact with them more like I would my family, and expect that they'll hunt out a drink or whatever they need when they need it so I dont spend the whole night stressing about anticipating the needs of guests. I have to admit, minus the stress, it's actually starting to be pretty fun!

    As for his mates, he now gives me at least a couple days warning, and I generally clear out for the night to my folks/friends house after helping get some food sorted otherwise I swear they would eat pizza shapes and sausages in buns every time! So much more to life in food options guys! I love cooking so happy to be able to help, especially considering how much he helps with his family dinners. If only I could be a caterer -I love the cooking, just not the entertaining part!!.

    We'll get there, its pretty tough for both of us so we just both need to talk talk talk and be honest. Sometimes you might hear things you don't like but its so important.

  3. #33
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    It depends, sometimes i enjoy it and sometimes i hate it.
    I always need notice though, visitors are something i have to mentally prepare for (as well as that i have to have time to ensure the house is presentable or i stress out). I am generally a loner and quite introverted so too much socialising drains me and if a visitor stays for a long time i sometimes feel a bit trapped (whereas if i am the visitor i have the option of leaving if it gets too much).
    Having said that i do enjoy get togethers at my house, so long as i have enough notice and it all goes smoothly. My mood plays a big part too - sometimes i am really in the mood for company and sometimes it is the last thing i want.

  4. #34
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    Default do you like having visitors at your house?

    Love it. I enjoy entertaining. But most of the ppl I know work ft and don't have time to socialist regularly.

    Very excited that we are hosting Xmas this year

  5. #35
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    Default do you like having visitors at your house?

    Sometimes, mainly depends on who it is!


 

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