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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Happy2be3 View Post
    I wouldn't say offended is how I would feel... But kids parties shouldn't be about what YOU would like your child to receive... It's about the gift giver choosing a present and giving it.
    This.

    Also its not the specifically 'asking' for a particular thing that makes it rude or whatever. Its the implication that clearly you and your child expect to get something. As London said, no ones going to turn up without a gift unless you tell them to. You should just wait and see if people ask for suggestions. If so then feel free to suggest money (although I just could not do that).

    Alternatively if your child doesn't need more toys then do as another post suggests and include info about donating to a charity.

    Telling your guests what to bring gives the wrong message to your child.

    Sorry, its just how I feel.

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by sweetpeamummy View Post
    I think because it is not the done thing it can be misconstrued as rude where in reality it makes logical sense than someone wasting money on unneeded gifts.
    I actually find it's become very common, especially at weddings and baby showers

  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Happy2be3 View Post
    I wouldn't say offended is how I would feel... But kids parties shouldn't be about what YOU would like your child to receive... It's about the gift giver choosing a present and giving it.
    This.

    Also its not the specifically 'asking' for a particular thing that makes it rude or whatever. Its the implication that clearly you and your child expect to get something. As London said, no ones going to turn up without a gift unless you tell them to. You should just wait and see if people ask for suggestions. If so then feel free to suggest money (although I just could not do that).

    Alternatively if your child doesn't need more toys then do as another post suggests and include info about donating to a charity.

    Telling your guests what to bring gives the wrong message to your child.

    Sorry, its just how I feel.

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by WineTime View Post
    This.

    Also its not the specifically 'asking' for a particular thing that makes it rude or whatever. Its the implication that clearly you and your child expect to get something. As London said, no ones going to turn up without a gift unless you tell them to. You should just wait and see if people ask for suggestions. If so then feel free to suggest money (although I just could not do that).

    Alternatively if your child doesn't need more toys then do as another post suggests and include info about donating to a charity.

    Telling your guests what to bring gives the wrong message to your child.

    Sorry, its just how I feel.
    Completely agree

  5. #25
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    Default Birthday party invitations - do you think its rude re: gifts?

    I don't mind it as long as it is prefaced with "we do not expect a gift but if you would still like to bring something we would prefer..."

    Most parties DD has been to the kid barely looks at the gift, I never have any idea if they liked what we chose, so would rather know in advance...

  6. #26
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    Default Birthday party invitations - do you think its rude re: gifts?

    I am doing this for our wedding for the same reason, we have a small house and not enough room for the crap we do have! We are also renovating and in constant need of money for that. Therefore my wording was along the lines of " your presence is all we require at our wedding, however if you would like to purchase a gift for us, we would greatly appreciate a small cash donation towards our never ending home renovations." I worded it better than that but you get the idea

  7. #27
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    I have the same problem with space and having 2 girls close in age means we have everything more than covered. The girls have bank accounts that close relatives eg Grandparents know about and put cash into as their main gift and then they might wrap a small gift like bubble bath or a book. I think everyone in our family knows that we have reached the point where unwanted/unneeded gifts go to charity or get regifted. We can't be that polite while living in a 86m2 house. I do always have a list of suggestions though like colouring book, crayons, paint etc. Consumables that we run out of and use up.

  8. #28
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    Default Birthday party invitations - do you think its rude re: gifts?

    I wouldn't find it rude, but I guess it depends on the situation, and how you word it.... but I feel it would put pressure on the parents to contribute more money than they may have spent on a present, so that they don't appear to be stingy. I know that if it is a close friend of my sons, I'm happy to pay more money for a present an would be happy to contribute money instead...but not for just a random class friend.

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Really dislike money being asked for at bdays, weddings, baby showers etc. I find it rude and ungrateful. I'm sure others will disagree but I really really dislike this trend of asking for money for every event that's held. If people want to give money, cool, but to ask for it? nah I would never do that.

    If your child has enough toys, just say no presents required just your presence
    What if the parents are on a limited income and the kid wants a new bike? We had this situation in DD's class last year - they are the loveliest least pretentious people I know, their DD who is the most down to earth kid I know desperately wanted a new bike, which they couldn't afford, so they made up a little poem and included it in the invitation about how much her old bike was falling apart and how she would love a new one. They asked for $5 to $10 only.

    There was nothing about it vaguely rude. I think it really depends on the people, and how they word it.

    Personally we probably wouldn't do it as DD loves opening birthday presents (even though almost all of them are still in a box waiting to be played with).

  10. #30
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    I don't really like the idea but I do think it depends on the wording and the reasoning behind it. I wouldn't mind getting a cute little poem like Sonja mentioned ^^^ about the new bike, and a small amount being requested too.
    But if you asked for 'money' to do 'activities' then yep I would find that rude!!

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