The thing is, if you make a choice as a couple for one person (usually the woman) to stay home and be a SAHM, then by its nature, the woman is usually financially dependent on her parter to bring in the income. Thats just a decision that you make together. The working partner is then depending on the SAHM to look after the children and the home so that he can work or further his career. I just don't see how a woman who makes the choice to be a SAHM is a bad role model.
I actually think that during the 90s and early 00's there was a big compulsion for women to get straight back to work to make the dollars, but i in the last 5 years or so i've seen a bit of a shift in attitudes. In my circle anyway. Most of my friends are very well educated in quite well progressed careers but a lot of them have decided to take 2,3,4 years off work completely because they want to in the home, raising their young children (and therefore financially dependent on their partners). Doesn't make them bad role models in my eyes..
I striving to have it both ways.
My eldest is 6yo, my youngest 7mo, I am and have been a SAHM for 6 years now, and will be for at least another 9 years. After that, I will almost be in the position to pursue my chosen career.
I plan to commence study in 2014, off campus, part time, before moving to full time during placements and then by the time I've finished and ready to start my career, my children will be teens, and not require as much of my time and energy as a Mum.
So there you go, I'm here for my children while they are young and need me the most, being able to help out at school, be there after school etc etc as well as showing them I study hard and strive to become a career woman. Best of both worlds
*I can haz typos*
I think your mum worked her **** off to give you a perfect childhood.
How lucky you are.
That's what I think.
I was largely financially dependent on my ex for a while while I studied - it was agreed, but I found it very tough.
Im not saying everyone should 'go get a job' and not be a SAHP at all! But long-term financial dependence isn't healthy for many spiritually, emotionally and financially. I'm sorry as clearly I've upset people here. But many people here are younger mums who haven't had to face these issues yet.
There's nothing wrong with being a SAHM, just be educated in your family's income and where it is. I lost count of the number of times women came to see me who had no idea where their husband's money was kept, or how it was earned and spent.
It's fine to be trusting and financially dependant, but be smart and savvy while you're at it.
I think people have very different ideas about what everyone's talking about when they say 'stay at home mum'. To me, there's a big difference between taking off work for the years when your kids are young, with the intention of going back to work one day (and hopefully keep their qualifications up in order to do so), and being a housewife forever. This will probably upset people, but yep if you are going to stay home after your kids are well and truly self sufficient (or even moved out of home) then I don't think you're a good role model. I don't. Cleaning an entire house takes a couple of hours a day, absolute maximum if you live in a mansion.
Cooking dinner- an hour. If your kids are at school from 9-3, well if I were the working parent I would sure feel like I got a dud deal. *dons flame proof vest*
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I am motivated in many many ways. I am motivated to teach my children, to better myself in many ways, motivated to help others and I am most certainly passionate, I just don't work in paid employment right now. And yesviews am financially dependant on my husband for now - and he has been financially dependant on me in the past.
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