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  1. #1
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    Default 3 & 5 Year olds driving me bananas constantly. Practical tips please?

    Hi, as the title says, our kids just argue and whinge and procrastinate over everything and it is making me crazy. I find myself screaming at them daily. I know this is the wrong thing to do, and that its hurtful and damaging to them.

    I am worried I am going to lose it and hurt them physically if I can't work out some ways to calm them down and get them to stop arguing and complaining constantly about absolutely everything.

    They never do what they are asked to do, even if it is for something they want i.e. if they ask to go to the park and I say yes lets go you need to get dressed, they refuse to get dressed for at least 30 minutes, then once we're outside they won't get in the car... and on and on and on.

    The whining is constant - just the sound of it makes my blood boil.

    I don't feel like doing anything nice for them. I don't feel like letting them make any decisions (vegemite or peanut butter kind of decisions), I just want to say "look, you are making everything so hard that you get nothing at all until you can start being reasonable".

    Only thing is... maybe they are totally normal and this is all totally normal behaviour and I am supposed to be insane because that's what parenting is all about?

    Do you think they are bored or lonely? Do I need to stimulate them more or put them to bed earlier or ? ? ? I just don't know anymore!

    They sleep from around 7.30pm to 6am. They have a balanced diet with limited treats i.e. toast with pb or vegemite for brekkie, plain milk, sandwiches and veggie sticks for lunch, fruit and yogurt for snacks, and always balanced dinners with plenty of veg and rice and meat. They watch about 1.5 hours tv per day, from 6-630 when they wake up and I am on the treadmill, and again from about 4.30-5.30 in the evening while I am doing dinner and winding down from work.

    DD is in kindergarten and after school care for 3 days, and DS is in family day care 8.15-5.30 the same 3 days.

    Our family is under a lot of pressure at the moment, we have a terminally ill person in our immediate family and I am also running a very small business outside of my 3 days of work outside the home - do you think they are picking up on my stress and anxiety?

    Maybe our routine has nothing to do with it and its all about my reactions and responses to their behaviour... I don't know?

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    Default 3 & 5 Year olds driving me bananas constantly. Practical tips please?

    I can't really help, but as a teacher, my fall back problem solver is to praise them for every. tiny. thing. they do right. Like, "oh wow! You guys are sitting watching tv so nicely! Thank you " I find that they discover that it's so nice getting that positive reinforcement that they try to do more good things to get more.

    At the start you feel like a complete fool carrying on about the littlest things, but it works!! I've even done it with the worst year 10 class in the school lol!

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    made2bAmummy  (20-10-2012)

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    Your not alone..... My 3.5 and 20 month old scream all day and Won't do a single thing , I know they are young. .... I mean if I say " come on boys lets put our socks on" it takes 20 minutes to do and a lot of physical lifting them and asking them to sit still... They see it all as a game. It's constant , nothing is easy , they oldest one crys ( whine / fake crys) over every little thing( he is ASD though ) and although he has improved so dramatically over the last 8 months he still has his days like today .... The boys are always doing things to make each other scream and I feel anxious at the sound of it. I think when your calm yourself they are calmer and happier . I just had another baby so am a little on edge and the boys are playing up due to this I think. Good luck . I always feel bad moaning,my annoyance with them has nothing to do with my love for them, that's 100% .... But gosh they stress me out !

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    made2bAmummy  (21-10-2012)

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    Default Re: 3 & 5 Year olds driving me bananas constantly. Practical tips please?

    I'm going through the same thing with my 3 kids. They're 7 years, 4 years and 22month old. It drives me insane.
    I don't have any sugestions sorry. I know what you're going through though xx.

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub

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    made2bAmummy  (21-10-2012)


 

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