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  1. #1
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    Default Please help with tantrums :(

    Ds is almost 18 months.
    He has started throwing massive tantrums when he is upset, frustrated, teething etc.

    Tonight he screamed, threw toys, threw himself on the floor, cried, hit and generally made a massive tantrum out of everything, from 6pm to 8.15 when I put him to bed early.

    I have tried talking to him calmly and telling him it's ok, trying to communicate with him to calm him down, nothing seems to work!

    Someone please tell me there is something else I can try?
    It's so upsetting to see him like that

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    Why does he have tantrums? I find with my son that trying to console him or even go near him makes it worse, so I walk away sometimes.

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    Default Please help with tantrums :(

    I don't know why.
    I think it's because he can't communicate with us what he wants, so he gets upset and frustrated.

    I've tried ignoring it but he just come over to me and throws himself on the floor in front of me.

  4. #4
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    Theophania is offline 'see what had happened was..there were these three ninjas and a blue monkey and well it really wasn't my fault..'
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    I have tried many different ways to deal with tantrums. What I do these days is I talk to the kids, sometimes they don't listen sometimes they do and then I walk away... For example:

    DD chucks some awesome tantys. Like claws me scream, throws stuff around and grunts etc etc you know the usual lol. I will firmly say to her Bubby (her nickname) mummy is not going to listen to you when you are acting like this. I am going to the kitchen now and you can come see me when you have calmed down... This normally works, she will get over it and move onto the next thing. I have tried comforting her, hugging her etc and she will just get worse so for me walking away is the best thing... I don't go anywhere she can't find me easily though because I want her to know I am still there, I just won't sit and take being screamed at etc....

    I also just keep reminding myself this is a phase and it will pass

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    Lumpy Melon  (17-10-2012)

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    My oldest had massive tantrums and I realised it was due to food . Stopped grapes and sultanas after reading book called 'fed up with children's behavior ' , he became dramatically better. He has mild autism but this was aside from that. My other son is 18 months and now my oldest is 3 . I made a natural ice cream packed with blue berries the other day, they had it two days in a row for desert and they both became terrible and tantrumed . I realised it could be that so stopped and for the last couple of days they have been great. Just a thought? It's the natural salicylate s in some fruit and veg and also colours a preservatives that set them off . I truly recommend that book!
    Fed up by sue dengates.

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    Default Re: Please help with tantrums :(

    I am super lucky that DS is pretty pathetic at tantrum throwing but what works quite well for him is to send him to his story teepee (teepee in his room with lots of cushions and soft toys where we read stories) it's not really a time out, more of a private, comfortable space for him to work off the tantrum.

    Sent from my HTC Sensation Z710a using BubHub

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    Default Please help with tantrums :(

    I find what works with my 23 month old DS is distraction, or ignoring it and start talking/doing something else he may be interested in, granted he has not really had any major tanties yet but tonight he started whining and fake crying when I said its bed time and DH just picked him up sideways and started pretending he was a guitar and "played" ( tickled) the guitar all the way to the bedroom signing Gangnam Style and he was laughing so much he forgot why he was cranky!

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    Default Please help with tantrums :(

    Quote Originally Posted by babynomad View Post
    My oldest had massive tantrums and I realised it was due to food . Stopped grapes and sultanas after reading book called 'fed up with children's behavior ' , he became dramatically better. He has mild autism but this was aside from that. My other son is 18 months and now my oldest is 3 . I made a natural ice cream packed with blue berries the other day, they had it two days in a row for desert and they both became terrible and tantrumed . I realised it could be that so stopped and for the last couple of days they have been great. Just a thought? It's the natural salicylate s in some fruit and veg and also colours a preservatives that set them off . I truly recommend that book!
    Fed up by sue dengates.
    Actually that might be a factor!

    He has had banana (usually only a couple times a fortnight) the last two days and both nights has tantrumed hardcore!

    I'm definitely going to look into that!
    Thank you

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    I'm kind of going through this now with my 18mnth old though this week has been great as I've gotten a handle on his behaviour and hes been a dream.

    Key things for me. Be calm! No point getting upset or annoyed it makes it worse.

    Xander isn't talking or saying words so sometimes its frustration from not being able to communicate what he wants I try to be understanding about that and we go through items to find what he wants.

    If its because I said no or removed him from a dangerous situation I try kneel down explain simply its too hot dangerous etc and make sure he's safe if he continues to tantrum as long as he's safe I stand up and walk away.

    He was hitting and kicking again I kneeled said simply please do not hit it hurts mummy stood up and left him if he was safe.

    For the first week I had to keep repeating these actions and often he would follow me but I having explained simply would ignore.He hasnt hit or kicked in over a week. And tantrums are short.

    My mchn whom is great explained at this age there is no such thing as a naughty or bad child. But they are learning behaviour and testing boundaries.

    I have had a great week with him by just remembering to be calm and consistent and fair.

    Also distraction I'm recognising potential tantrum inducing situations faster lol and move to counteract them.

    This said with confidence of a first time mum who was permanently in tears last month and I know he's going to change the rules on me again. :P

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    She has a website called ' fed up' just google fed up and sue dengates , she has a lot of info on there if you didn't want to buy the book. I really have found with my kids they cannot eat grapes or sultanas without becoming crazy , my oldest actually looses his speech and crys so it's pretty bad. I know It may seem that more kids have food issues but when I was younger we had quite plain food , maybe apples mostly as food and cakes where all homemade but a treat , so you can see where the build up of these natural chemicals occur and can last for days. I'm totally with Sue dengates and luckily for our family have only had to make small food adjustments.

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