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  1. #11
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    I feel like I did, but before it started. I was studying at uni. Something I don't feel I can go back to with kids as the lower levels involve a lot of travel and most people don't have kids in that field until they are in the office stage of their career. Or they are mature aged and their kids are older I guess? In any case I don't want to leave my kids for extended periods.

    I feel like I give up my career for Dh's, not the kids. Even when they are all in school I wonder how i would juggle it as there is no room to move with what he does. His hours are all over the place and he is mostly there 6 days a week for really long days (12-15 hours). I would have to do what single mums do I guess, (meaning it isn't impossible, as plenty of single mums do it) but I feel like that is unfair that DH gets to do whatever he likes and commit as much as he likes to work. My career would never get to the level his will, as I would have to sacrifice our children ever seeing either of us. As it is, seeing their dad is a treat, so at least they have me.

  2. #12
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    I had a great career before DD1 - I was a senior lawyer at a large law firm heading for partnership, until a baby sidelined that. I wound up resigning as I couldn't negotiate a satisfatory 3 days a week role after maternity leave, and went to antother law firm which was great initially, but after my 2nd round of maternity leave (another 12 months) my career went backwards. I found myself doing much less cmoplicated and satisfying work, but I also found the juggle much more difficult with 2, as DD2 used to get sick every week in childcare and I felt like I was never at work or if I was at work I felt guilty.

    When I became pregnant with DS1 I vowed to never return to law as I just didn't want to do the work/home juggle anymore, and once DD1 started school couldn't get my head around how I would do it anyway (ie manage drop offs and pick ups alone as DH starts early and finishes late). IN the end I was offered a 2 day a week role in-house working only school hours - perfect! So I feel I haven't had to give my career up after all - but if this job hadn't come along I probably would have given up, although I personally feel I am a better mum when I work.

  3. #13
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    Default Did you give up your career?

    Sort of, I have been selling Real Estate for 22 years and we own the office, I could gladly never go back , i thought i would miss it but much prefer to stay at home but I do go in a few hours a week to help out, I'm not making anywhere near the money I was but much prefer to be at home with DS 90% of the time, I'll go back a few days when he starts school mainly to pay for his school fees!

  4. #14
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    Default Did you give up your career?

    Yes - I had a great job in HR that I left for DD1 (and because we were relocating). Then dd2 came along and now I need to decide about going back (part-time) or stay at home.


    It just seems like such a waste to have completed my Masters to be a sahm.

  5. #15
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    Default Did you give up your career?

    In all honesty yes. But I was an apprentice hairdresser, and have no desire to return to that area of work. Having children made me realise that hairdressing was not for me.
    I now work in childcare two days a week as a trainee. I plan to do my diploma afterwards and possibly even go to uni after that

  6. #16
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    I always intended to return to work and realised that the longer out of the workforce the harder it would be to return to it so I didn't have any intentions of being out of it for years on end. I had 12mths off after having ds2 and was very ready to go back. I don't have to work for financial reasons, I want to.
    As much as I love being a mum I also love my work and the mental stimulation it provides. I feel my kids not being with me every hour of every day makes them appreciate me that little bit more besides helps them to be happy social kids and working makes me a better mum. Quantity of time isn't necessarily what counts, it's good quality time that's most beneficial in my opinion.

  7. #17
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    I had worked for nearly 20 years in various PA roles and had no intention of going back to work after DD was born int he same way, but perhaps set up a small bookeeping business or something. When she was three months old I had an urgent phone call to help my old bosses daughter for a few hours in her new business in a totally different field. Fast forward three years - I'm now there 2 days a week and love it. So sort of fell into it by default!

  8. #18
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    TimTamsandTea is offline ...if only all relationships were so perfectly sweet!
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    Primary Teacher.
    Went on 2 year maternity leave.
    Knew soon after ds1 was born that I couldn't happily return to my position.
    Attempted to negotiate a part-time position which, at this school, is rare.
    Resigned and fell pregnant with ds2.
    Not interested in returning to teaching any time soon and, provided we continue to get by, will stay home until ds2 starts school.
    I miss my colleagues.

  9. #19
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    Default Did you give up your career?

    I have worked part-time since becoming a mum, and I love it. I'm a teacher. I have missed out on some opportunities to advance my career, but there is plenty of time for that later.

  10. #20
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    Not gave up my career, more like stalled it or put it on hold. With my work, it can be either a job or a career IYKWIM. I did apply for a higher position last year but they wanted me to up my hours and as i'd only just upped them a few weeks before, i wasn't ready to do it again so soon.
    I'm on mat leave now and struggling mentally as i really really enjoyed my job and would so have undertaken whatever it took to get that higher position if it weren't for our family aspirations to have another child.
    I'm encouraged and motivated that i'll go higher career-wise one day; plenty of women in my area have a family and successful career.
    I'm a special area nurse.


 

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