In a relationship both parties should be able to sound off and support each other. I would hate to be in a relationship where I felt that I couldn't mention how upset I was/ tired I was because my husband worked long hours?!!
To my mind, if he works long hours then he has every right to complain about how tired he is. And if his partner is tired after a day with the children, then she has every right to complain about how tired she is too.
Both are important jobs in terms of supporting and developing the family. One is not more important than the other. In that set-up both parties are splitting duties to ensure the family is supported. Both can complain as much as they like, and both can (or should) support each other as much as they can.