Im divorced from my DD's father (thank goodness) and both herself and I have his surname. We were married when she was born so he is on her birth certificate.
Ive researched into changing her name legally to reflect my current partners surname (we will be getting married one day) and our baby who I am expecting now will have my partners surname.
I know I cant change DD's surname legally without ex DH's consent (grrrrr) even though I have a court order for full custody and he has limited visitation.
So, I have a friend who has hyphenated their childs surname but not changed it legally. She has used the hyphenated name for a long time and eventually dropped the original surname, and she is now known by her step dads surname (but not changed legally).
For example: *this IS an example, not the childs name!*
- original name Mary Smith
- mum got remarried and hyphenated the name to Mary Smith- Jones
- after a while, is now known as Mary Jones and has been for some time.
I dont want to have to go to court or anything as the ex is a horrible person and I do not want to stir the pot legally (its a very long story). Its been over 6 years since he has seen DD which suits us fine as my partner now has been her Daddy since she was 2.