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  1. #11
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    Hi OP I KNOW how you feel but my urge to have the big family still won. Not having the 4 or 5 to you is definitely not because your children are a hassle or anything but I think you made a decision lisitioning with your head and your heart. My head was trying to say stop but my heart kept saying **** up!!!
    We will have 4 children come February and I always say if we were smart we would have stopped at 2. I love al my children but I'm lucky my circumstances make it a little easier to manage.

  2. #12
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    Oh sweetpeamummy I think large families are awesome and kind of wish I had it in me to handle 4 or 5 children but I had totally romanticised what it would be like to have a large family and I am at my limit with three! I am happy to admit that and when this person (friend of a friend) suggested that people stop at 2 or 3 because they find their children a nuisance and was annoyed that people suggest to her that having a large family is hard work when really it's just parents not wanting to sacrifice things to enjoy their children their properly I just bit my tongue. I figure even if she goes on to have a large family she's probably not going to find it quite as easy as she is playing out in her head!!

  3. #13
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    I always thought I wanted 2 kids, then when I was pregnant I started thinking 3 would be a nice number! Then DD was born and for the first 3 months or so I swore blind that we wouldn't be having another baby. I had a rough start at motherhood and it was nothing like I had imagined. The shock of it all scared me off! Now DD is 14mo and we're TTC. I'm back to thinking 2.... Or maybe 3 I'm much more prepared for reality now so hoping it'll be easier second time around.

    It might sound strange but if we have another girl I'll be a lot less likely to go for #3. If we have a boy I think #3 would be more likely as I wouldn't be too fussed about the gender if that makes sense.

    I think I'll keep changing my mind for now but I trust that we'll know when we're done.

  4. #14
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    I always thought I wanted 4. But the realities of kids and finances made me see sense. I was happy to stop at 2, but we had a surprise number 3. Ds1 has spina bifida and ds2 is a heart kid, so there's no way we're having more.

  5. #15
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    I once thought I would have 3-4 kids or maybe even more but as time has gone on and we have had children that has come down to 2 kids max, possibly even just the one.

    For me its nothing to do with not enjoying having kids, I absolutely love having my daughter in my life and its the times with her that makes me feel like I could have more kids. Its more that I had kids later in life than I originally thought I would, the age gap between my partner and I (10 years). And then I had a complicated birth and was pretty sick myself and my daughter was a premature baby. We had a really rough start for the first 12-18 months and I ended up with post natal depression and while I often think I would like to have another baby I am still holding off worrying in case the same events happen again. We've also looked at some of our future plans such as schooling, travel etc and try to work out whether we can actually afford comfortably to extend our family. I do believe we may have a sibling for our daughter but will stop at 2 kids.

  6. #16
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    I always wanted 4 kids. We had our first when I was 21 a ds, then 2.5yrs later had a beautiful dd and my husband said he thinks that we're done and I agreed. We were blissfully content. THEN we had an unexpected pregnancy when our dd was 13mths old! I was really shocked but we it was a shock to both of us and we had another gorgeous ds. BUT life was very hectic from when our 2nd ds was about 1 yr old. Life went by as a blur and our kids especially the oldest was very full on active child. Having then had 3 seemed like we had crossed over into the big family territory and although I didn't want no 4 immediately I couldn't rule it out it became a maybe one day thought . And I pointed o

  7. #17
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    I always wanted 4 kids. We had our first when I was 21 a ds, then 2.5yrs later had a beautiful dd and my husband said he thinks that we're done and I agreed. We were blissfully content. THEN we had an unexpected pregnancy when our dd was 13mths old! It was a shock to both of us and we had another gorgeous ds. BUT life was very hectic from when our 3rd child was about 1 yr old. Life went by as a blur and our kids especially the oldest was very full on active child. Having then had 3 seemed like we had crossed over into the big family territory and although I didn't want no 4 immediately I couldn't rule it out, it became a maybe one day thought . And I pointed out to my hubby I don't feel done. Anyways our youngest ds is now 6 and we are due anyday with our long awaited no 4 baby and expecting a little girl. So we needed time and our 3 kids needed us so much that we got the big family we had always wanted just spaced out a little differently as reality hit when the kids arrived about all the hard work and time you need for each child.

  8. #18
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    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    I always wanted 4. Just planning number 1 and I think 2 will be the magic number for us. We can't afford the cost of fertility treatment on one income while also raising existing children! We don't want to completely deplete our savings.

    We might change our mind though of course!

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cue View Post

    It might sound strange but if we have another girl I'll be a lot less likely to go for #3. If we have a boy I think #3 would be more likely as I wouldn't be too fussed about the gender if that makes sense.

    I think I'll keep changing my mind for now but I trust that we'll know when we're done.
    This is me! If we have another boy, I'm pretty sure we'll be done, but if we have a girl, I am keen to go back for a third.

    I always knew I wanted at least two. DH wanted three. I was ready to do it all again as soon as DS was born (damn that natural high!), but we're waiting until after Christmas to TTC #2. I still definitely want two... we'll see how we feel after that.

  10. #20
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    Ive always wanted 4 kids. Now i have 2 girls and we are definitely going to have another in a couple of years and hopefully another one after that.

    We have been blessed with easy pregnancies, good births and cruisy babies. I would happily have a dozen kids if we could afford them.


 

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