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  1. #1
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    Default DS 4yrs and the haircut battle

    Hi all,
    So Ds who will be 4 in Jan, is due for a haircut. Problem is, he hates, sorry loathes it!

    Im not sure if he is afraid, but I think so. His last haircut, we literally had to hold him tightly as we couldnt leave him with half a head of hair!! He got so worked up, he vomited! He wont even let the hairdresser put the robe on him!
    We have tried distracting him with games on phone, Tv just wont do. Does anyone have any suggestions for me?
    I was told by someone to just let him freak out and he will eventually get used to it, but Im not sure I want to upset him so much if there is another gentler approach..
    Thing is I drag out the haircut as much as I can, but he is due (if not over due) for one now.
    Any tips would be greatly appreciated

  2. #2
    sweetsugardumplin''s Avatar
    sweetsugardumplin' is offline be the change you want to see in da world
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    I think his last experience of the haircut (being restrained and vomiting) has created so much anxiety for him....you definitely need to go the gentler approach.

    As an educator and parent using dolls and role play can help ch'n overcome anxiety

    Purchase a few dolls from the op shop (make sure they have hair) and set up a little hairdressing salon. Let him be the hairdresser, help him with scissors if he needs help, provide him with a few props: hair brush, comb, water spritz bottle etc......and as he plays, gently and calmly describe what he is doing.

    Let him have long hair until you feel he's ready....if it gets in his eyes, just side part it.

    He will need lots of practice to `be in control' overcome his anxiety and work out that a haircut isn't so awful after all...........but it will take time.

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  4. #3
    SpecialPatrolGroup's Avatar
    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    I agree with SSD. Also, have him go along and see you or someone else getting a hair cut, watch some calm kids getting a hair cut. I took my DD in 15 minutes before the appointment time and sat in the chair with her on my lap and we looked at ourselves in the mirror and watched what was going on and played with a brand new puzzle. The hair dresser put the cape on me first and then put it on DD and approached her very gently, played with the ends of her hair, let her touch the comb and see the scissors etc. Softly softly is the way to go IMO.

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    Agree with the first reply.

    My son has always loathed haircuts until recently. We just let it go as we refused to make him do it if he was going to get upset. We were concerned that forcing him into it would cause anxiety (obviously it does)

    Ive seen parents who physically restrain their kids in order to get their hair cut and...well its just awful to see to put it mildly.

    Unfortunately because of the last experience its probably going to take some time for him to work through it and I can kind of understand.

    Preschool had a hairdressing role play section set up and he took a real interest in it. After a few weeks of that he decided he'd consent to a haircut. He didn't enjoy it bur he wasn't upset either and each haircut has gotten easier. Now he actually asks to go there.

  6. #5
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    BarefootedMumma is offline Aiming to be in the top 10 busiest users one week.
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    I'm not sure if yo would be up for this.. maybe your DP but..

    My god son was so freaked about getting his hair cut I decided to shave it off.. he was very scared of that even.. I let him shave mine first (well the parts of it, nothing at the edges) and then he was happy to let me do his. He's never had an issue with it since.

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    My DS was the same as your son ... we left a salon once with half a haircut after he threw up In the end we found a barber who had a Mickey Mouse cape (he was obsessed with MM) ... she put it on him and he let her cut his hair as he found all the different Mickey images on the cape. He was 4.5 years old at the time.

    He's now nearly six and for the first time last week he let my hairdresser cut his hair without an issue ... but for the last 1.5 years we only went to the 'Mickey haircut' as he called her as it was the only salon where he didn't cry.

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    My son has Aspergers and along with that usually comes sensory issues. We gave up going to hairdressers at 12 months. The only way I can cut his hair is put on his favourite movie, sit him I'm front, give him chocolate afterwards as a reward. For a week before hand I read social stories to him regarding getting a hair cut, and we desensitize him by brushing his hair with our hands and talking about cutting his hair.

    He still hates it and will end up in tears if I don't prepare him thoroughly as I just explained.

    Good luck! Social stories are a MUST though :-)

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    My DS1 was like that too, he also has Aspergers. I didn't find anything at all that worked for him. After his first haircut disaster I really didn't think I could go through that again with a hairdresser, so I started just shaving his head with clippers at home. He still screamed and screamed, but eventually he just got more patient with it. He is now almost 10yo and he still loathes getting haircuts, he still flinches and yelps and shrinks away from the clippers while I'm using them and sometimes will cry, but he knows it has to be done so he does stand there for me.

    So no advice really sorry, just that I know how you feel!

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    Thanks guys for your replies. It has been really hard to have his haircut. In the past, my sis would cut his hair whilst he played with my phone, but my sis did it sneekily and it took us about an hr to do! Thing is she is not a hairdresser, so as u could imagine..... But it did the job, but as it grew you could tell it was crooked and it needed to be rectified by a hairdressr, so we had a family friend who is a hairdresser do it, and as I said it was horrible. I hated seeing my baby so distressed.

    But you all have given me some tips I will def try. I would just leave it, but we are having a family portrait done in a couple pf weeks and it really looks long and in need of a trim atleast!
    Wish me and especially DS luck!

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    My Ds is kinda the same,I cut his hair but he freaks out with all the hair over him,he gets itchy and has a meltdown.So frustrating!
    When I took him to hairdresser he did freak out.Have you tried him sitting on your knee?
    Obviously not ideal but an idea (haha I had to do this when DS went to dentist,lie down on chair with him lying on me)

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