It is sad that health care providers don't always recognise or appreciate these truths.
It is great that you have a strong advocate in your Mum. Let her know all the things you want, write it down and devise a plan together, so when it is time for baby to come, you have all the information there and don't have to think about it cos you know what you want.
While writing your plan for your optimal birth, also research, consider and devise plans for if circumstances arise. It is easier to think about what you will or won't consent to now.
Best wishes for an awesome birth and first meeting with your baby!