+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 9 of 9
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    976
    Thanks
    262
    Thanked
    298
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Advice needed re going away before birth (partner)

    Okay so my partner who has not travelled much, only overseas once, has been asked to go to a conference in Europe. It's for work and a very good opportunity. He would leave 5 weeks before the due date and be back with four weeks until due date.
    Would you be nervous, upset or not bothered. It's my first baby so I am mainly the first two!!! Would you say go or put your foot down?!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    1,018
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    225
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    That's a difficult situation! For me I would be ok with it because I have alot of family support other than dh so if I did happen to have bubs earlier than expected I know I would not be alone! Do you have support close by other than your dh??
    I think although I would be really upset ( mainly that I wasn't also going) I would have I look at it as a great opportunity and tell dh to go!
    And then when he left I would cry and curse him for leaving me

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to wannaBamumma For This Useful Post:

    acerbaby  (04-10-2012)

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    3,678
    Thanks
    788
    Thanked
    1,847
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    If all was going smoothly with my pregnancy, I would insist that he go as long as I had someone who could come and stay with me like my mum or my sister or a friend so I could do some nice pampering before baby.

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    99
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    17
    Reviews
    0
    As its your first I would say its ok. Not many people go 4 weeks early.
    My hubby went to QLD for a week with work at the same time as you're talking about.

    But QLD is a bit closer than Europe It would have been easier if I didn't have the other 2 toddlers to look after. I told him he better enjoy it as its the last time he'll have on his own for quite some time

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    6,213
    Thanks
    387
    Thanked
    594
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    My dh was away from when I was 35.5 weeks til I was 38 weeks, but he was only 2 hours away. I did the research and really very few babies come before 37 weeks. I spent a lot of time relaxing and spending time with my Mum getting ready for bubs arrival. I did find it stressful emotionally having dh away, but he was away for 2.5 weeks, not 1 week.

    The issue is that if you do go into labour & have the baby your dh may miss it and are you both going to manage that emotionally? He can get travel insurance, but I doubt that they would pay for him to return early or not go if you had pregnancy issues/early delivery. You would need to check this. So, what happens if you have bubs at 32 weeks? He'd be around for the birth, but then if he didn't go away 2 weeks later he'd lose all the money for his trip.

    Honestly, it's just a conference. I go to heaps and quite a few look great on paper and aren't that great. I've gone to some when I've been sick or distracted and even with my best efforts I struggle for those.

    On a purely financial basis I'd probably say I personally wouldn't risk it.

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    1,403
    Thanks
    93
    Thanked
    387
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I would say go! He's not taking a holiday, plus its only a week.
    DH was coming and going till the last 4 weeks (his doing I really wasn't bothered) and left for a week when baby was 8 weeks... the man's a wreak every time but I'm always reassuring him its ok! I can deal and its for work!!

  8. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    1,391
    Thanks
    812
    Thanked
    688
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I'd probably be nervous about it but I'd let him go anyway. The chance of going that early is only very small. My partner is my only support person though so I would probably have to ask a friend to be my emergency support if I did happen to go early.

  9. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    2,290
    Thanks
    2,377
    Thanked
    903
    Reviews
    72
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I would tell him to go, I would be apprehensive sure, but it is only a week and it's also very unlikely you will go into labour 4 weeks early, but very likely you will go over due date! If you have another support person of course, I think you will be fine try to enjoy the time alone, I am sure you have heard this a million times, but time alone is rarer than trips to Europe when baby comes along!

  10. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    270
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked
    45
    Reviews
    0
    I'd probably say let him go. You'd be 35-36 weeks... if you've got friends/family around the area that can help you if you go into early labour for some reason...

    I'd maybe tell your OB or midwife, and just have them check you and make sure you're not engaged early.

    My hubby went to NZ for a funeral when I was 35 weeks. I obviously couldn't go, but I was fine about him going. My son was born very quickly and unexpectedly at 37 weeks, which took us all by surprise, but I had no inclination at all even the day beforehand. This time with #2 I'll be more cautious, but I think 35 weeks is fine in my opinion.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Help, advice needed re: vag birth or c-section.
    By Grebbeci in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-11-2012, 07:19
  2. Desperately need birth partner
    By pynk in forum Seeking a Midwife or Doula?
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 30-03-2012, 18:14

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Shapland Swim Schools
Shapland's at participating schools offer free baby orientation classes once a month - no cost no catches. Your baby will be introduced to our "natural effects" orientation program develop by Shapland's over 3 generations, its gentle and enjoyable.
sales & new stuffsee all
True Fairies
True Fairies is the first interactive website where children can engage and speak with a real fairy through the unique webcam fairy portal. Each session is tailored to the child, and is filled with enchantment and magic.
Visit website to find out more!
featured supporter
The MAMA Centre
Pregnancy, birth & beyond care with your very own midwife. Home & hospital birth support, VBACs, antenatal & postnatal care by medicare eligible midwives & holistic health practitioners. Massage, chiro, naturopathy, yoga, counselling & beauty therapy
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!