For no reason in particular, just a heap of things. All while trying to figure out what is the "right" thing to do.
I don't really expect anyone to read this, I just need to get my scrambled thoughts out somewhere.
So we moved from SA to QLD in May. We have decided we want to move home. We miss it, we mua our family and our friends. We could go in Feb or end August. We are leaning toward Feb.
We came here with nothing and made it. But for some reason I'm absolutely petrified of going home. I know I need to stop thinking about the what ifs.
What if DH doesn't get a job? But if we stay, what if his contract isn't renewed? Which is very possible at the moment. But if it IS renewed, is it better for his career to stay here? He doesn't even want a career... I want him to have a stable, steady job & income that he enjoys. He doesn't care so much. He wants to work minimum hours for good money.
If he doesn't get a job we cant get a house.. What if we are still staying with mum when the baby is born!!! 4 of us crammed into one tiny bedroom just won't work.
I don't want to rely on family to bail us out. I want a steady income. I want to study something, but I don't know what. I want to study something and COMPLETE IT! I always quit on everything. I want to get a good job when ds goes to kindy.
We came here to get ahead and pay off our ddebts and start knocking down the mortgage. We haven't even touched the mortgage! We paid off other debts, which we would have done anyway, as we used our tax money!
We HAVE learnt a lot. It's been an adventure. We were stuck in a rut. Dh has proven to himself that he can do something other than retail (but he still lacks confidence!!!) And most of all, we moved on from the loss of Luka. We had a great holiday on the way up just the 3 of us.