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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoxerDogLover View Post
    I think all of these are great points. Also perhaps our daughters (and sons, they can be attacked too if they are being mugged) need to be taught self defence as teenagers, maybe in Physical Education at school? If somebody grabbed me I wouldn't have the first clue as to what to do, other than scream and thrash about or go for the balls, but i know there are some very effective techniques to get out of a persons grip. Hmm, maybe i need to take some self defence classes!
    Aikido is a martial art which is particularly useful for smaller people - you use someones weight/height against them with very little force. My Dad has taught me several simple moves which are very effective.

  2. #12
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    Gothel is offline Skip the drama, stay with Mama!
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    I'm another one that has done some stupid things in my time, walking to save taxi fare, being out alone in places i shouldn't have been, drunk and otherwise. I have been so lucky on occasion that nothing happened. Jesus I think of some of the situations I and friends have been in, a couple of particularly dodgy ones, and I shudder. Young and stupid. Or out with friends that didn't look after us. One girlfriend was left all alone on a friday night in a strange city, no idea where her hotel was, no key to get in, and no money to pay for another room, cos her 'friend' hooked up with some guy and deserted her. She ended up staying with a complete stranger, a guy, who luckily turned out to be really lovely and took great care of her, but how could she have known when he was reassuring her it was safe to stay with him, how could she have known he was telling the truth?

    We recently got a new back door in and I'm concerned that there is no lock on the screen door. I don't like not being able to lock myself into the house when we're home alone during the day. I've read too many reports of home invaders getting access through unlocked doors. DH will have to sort that out before summer comes
    Last edited by Gothel; 28-09-2012 at 11:50.

  3. #13
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    I just did this at your suggestion, and I cannot believe how much stuff is going on in my town. I would never have guessed!! Thanks for the tip.

    Quote Originally Posted by rainbow road View Post
    Can I suggest everyone follow their state's police force and/or local area command on facebook? They often post about things like attempted abductions that don't make the news.

    I have had my drink spiked while alone in London, I was very fortunate that the acquaintance I was with was willing to take me to his place to stay.

  4. #14
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    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    I just did this at your suggestion, and I cannot believe how much stuff is going on in my town. I would never have guessed!! Thanks for the tip.
    Scary, hey?

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by headoverfeet View Post
    I think it's important to raise our sons to respect women which is not easy in todays society. We teach 'be safe' to females, we should be teaching 'don't rape' to males. Then there is the issue of victim blaming
    How do you teach 'don't rape' to males? Every male in our society knows that it is against the law and morally repulsive. That is no secret. It is widely known and the man who committed the crime mentioned knew it, but he acted anyway. Unfortunately there have always been and always will be people who commit terrible crimes. I get the whole 'victim blaming ' thing, but at the end of the day I can't control what other people are going to do, I can only minimise the risk to myself by avoiding certain situations that are more dangerous than others. The world isn't fair.

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Witchypoo View Post
    How do you teach 'don't rape' to males? Every male in our society knows that it is against the law and morally repulsive. That is no secret. It is widely known and the man who committed the crime mentioned knew it, but he acted anyway. Unfortunately there have always been and always will be people who commit terrible crimes. I get the whole 'victim blaming ' thing, but at the end of the day I can't control what other people are going to do, I can only minimise the risk to myself by avoiding certain situations that are more dangerous than others. The world isn't fair.

    It has to start with teaching out sons to respect women. Treat all women as you would your mother or sister. That rape is akin to murder in my eyes, and men who do this aren't "real men".

  7. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to darla87 For This Useful Post:

    headoverfeet  (28-09-2012),Rutabaga  (28-09-2012)

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    Thank you op for starting this thread.

    I went out last night in Melbourne with friends and for the first time I was really scared. I'd been in the same area with one of my girlfriends a few months ago and felt much more relaxed walking at midnight after a movie back to the car.
    Last edited by Veve; 28-09-2012 at 17:40.

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    Sick and twisted individuals like this almost always start out committing petty crime... Approach women and make them uncomfortable, attempt to grab women, harass women, behave strangely in one way or another, hurt animals (big red flag in children/young adults who go on to become killers)...

    Such things should never be ignored, and always reported.
    Last edited by Veve; 28-09-2012 at 17:40.

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    I was assaulted on a bus in England. A full bus. I was young, and scared and embarrassed. And travelling alone. I'll never forget his smug, taunting smile. And he was so much bigger than me. Physically intimidating. It was a 12hr coach trip and I was sick as a dog and huddled up against the window.

    To this day I freeze slightly when a man I don't know sits next to me on a train/bus.

    I think its a very complicated issue as people offend for so many different reasons.

    But one thing I would like to see change - I would like to see violence against women become unacceptable in pron. Some main****** pron follows themes of r.ape or violence and shows women resisting, then enjoying it. I would love for this to disappear. I don't care if its just 'fantasy'. The idea of men getting turned on by 'fantasy' violence against women scares me. Violence shouldn't be depicted as s.exy.

    The other thing is people think that if its busy, you're safe. Not true. Other people being around won't protect you automatically. Fight. Make a scene. Draw the attention of bystanders. That can help if you're being harrassed or threatened with kidnap. I wish I had done that. And if you are a bystander - don't ignore pleas for help, or someone in distress. Call the police. Don't assume someone else will do so or has done.
    Last edited by Veve; 28-09-2012 at 17:41.

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    babynomad  (28-09-2012),LoveLivesHere  (28-09-2012),shelle65  (28-09-2012)

  13. #20
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    Yes likewise - I was horrified that a recent 'erotic liturature' (AKA badly written story about sexual violence) was so popular, with women! Seriously disturbing.

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    LoveLivesHere  (28-09-2012),MissMuppet  (28-09-2012)


 

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