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    Default Explaining IVF to your children

    Hi, im due in November, and im wondering what ways people have told their children that they are an IVF child. i have seen a number of books online, but you can't read them. Do anyone have any ideas?

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    It's funny as I don't even see it as Somthing that needs explaining. Like they were born cs instead of natural delivery. They were ivf instead of natural conception. Didn't cross my mind. I know there is some material out there.

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    I don't think it's necessary either why would you need to tell your kids about it when you can just simply say you struggled to have them you wanted them so much and finally they came.

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    I'm not sure if I will... I have a daughter through IVF and now that she is here, the method of her conception seems like a distant memory!!! (although if we go back for round 2 I'm sure it'll seem very real again!!). That said, if and when she starts thinking about kids, it will be something she might want to know about.... We'll play it by ear I think.

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    I think it's important to tell them. I don't want my children growing up and feeling weird or different when they do find out, if I were to only tell them at 20 years old. We have an ivf book called "and the there was you" which explains it really well. My children will know how much they were wanted and how we travelled to what seemed like the ends of the earth to get them here.

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    BettyW  (05-05-2013)

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    I'll tell mine. Not sure when but at my clinic there was a book 'Who's Ivy F?' -- something like that could be a starting point. http://www.katrinalogan.com/content/whos-ivy-f-ivf

    I'm not shy about telling people we went through IVF and so I don't know why I wouldn't tell my kid. Better than being told you were an accident and the only reason your mother stayed with your father like I always was!

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    We intend to tell. We also have the added complication of using donor. Do any of the books mentioned above discuss donor as well? If not does anyone know any books that might be suitable?

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    Since our children will be conceived with donor sperm (and possibly also donor eggs, eventually), I am definitely planning on telling them how they came to be, as soon as they are old enough to understand in basic terms. I don't think it would be right at all to withhold it from them. I want them to know how amazingly special they are and how badly we wanted them. ETA: Nette I'd like to know that too! At this stage I was planning on just stating the obvious; that Daddy didn't have any sperm (and if we end up using donor eggs, that Mummy's eggs couldn't make babies), so one (or two) VERY special people gave us theirs to use instead, a tiny baby was made with them, then the tiny baby was put in Mummy's tummy by a doctor to grow until they were ready to be born. Pretty straightforward, and as they get older I can elaborate on it.
    Last edited by Sariele; 05-05-2013 at 16:20.

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    It's something which will definitely be explained given they've been conceived with donor sperm and have two mums.

    I wouldn't withhold it anyway though. My mum has always been honest about my conception and my biological father and i am grateful for that.

    We will always make sure our children know if they want to contact him we will be nothing but supportive.

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    It's something which will definitely be explained given they've been conceived with donor sperm and have two mums.

    I wouldn't withhold it anyway though. My mum has always been honest about my conception and my biological father and i am grateful for that.

    We will always make sure our children know if they want to contact him we will be nothing but supportive.


 

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