Just wanting to see if there are any other hubbers out there who may be in a similar position to myself and have any suggestions/advice/success stories to offer?
I have struggled with depression (pretty severely at times) for the past 10 years. I started out being managed by the GP who suggested I go onto anti-depressant medication for 6 months to help me get better. I am still on them BUT I must say, they have indeed saved my life and I have made peace with the fact that I will probably still need them for a few more years yet. I now see an absolutely wonderful psychiatrist who works only with women during their child-bearing and early parenting years. I was referred to him through the hospital where I had DD.
As DD is almost 2 I am really, really, REALLY wanting to start trying for No.2... but I'm scared. Terrified, actually, that I won't cope and will stuff up not only mine and DH's lives again but DD's as well! Some days I feel as though it would be so fine and lovely and then others I feel like I'm crazy and selfish to even think I could do it. I know DH wants another one if not two children, and so do I, but I think the fear is just SO strong and ever present that it's been really hard to be at peace with the idea. And I know lack of sleep and lack of support were the 2 main factors for me last time and that either one really can't be helped again this time as we don't have much family at all and sleeping with a new bub....well!! Lol!
I only just fully recovered from my PND when DD was about 18 months old and only felt that real earth-moving bond happen when she was 14 months old. Everything between her and I is so wonderful and beautiful and as it should be now, I'm very blessed to have her . I just wish I could see into the future to KNOW it won't be as bad the second time around as I am wanting this next baby so very much.
I would love to hear from/chat with anyone in a similar position.
Thanks in advance xx