Both of your beliefs are equally as important.
Luckily for me, my partner was all for it being done with our son.
I however, found i couldnt get it done anywhere as it isnt really done anymore in my area.
I travelled south and went through a private surgeon to have it done.
He was 1 year old by this time.
I can say, he was given alot of pain relief and numbed in the area for it.
We werent allowed in for it. But we went in straight after he woke up.
Of course he was crying, as he was disorientated, but once he saw us he was fine after a little while and that was that!
No complications...no pain afterwards...it was easy to tend to and healed very well.
I hope you two can sort it out. Its a very private decision which seems to get people hot under the collar.
I think showing him the video is a very good idea
As the previous poster has said, it's a very private issue which seems to cause so much unnecessary contention in my opinion. I'm sure it would be extremely difficult when you and your husband are on very different pages about this issue and what you both believe is best for your son.
Luckily, my husband and I both wanted our son circumcised and there was no arguement at all about the issue. He was done at one week old at the hospital where he was born and had absolutely no complications at all. The doctor did a wonderful job and we're so pleased we had it done. We have no regrets at all and would have it done again if we ever had another boy.
I really hope that you and your husband are able to come to a mutual decision. Good luck!!!
Like everyone has said have the mature conversation, show the video, share information and points of view. Be totally calm and grown up.
If that doesn't work the put your foot down. Be loud and clear.
"Under No Circumstances Is Anyone Needlessly Cutting Off Any Part Of My Baby Boy!!!"
Sometimes reasonable just doesn't work and if you feel strongly about it express it strongly. I'm not sure this is not an issue where compromise is possible.
Get him to watch the video, if he decides he still wants it done he has to arrange the procedure and then care for his son completely (other then breastfeeding if that's what you're doing) until it heals.
Howdy, So thought I'd give a quick update on things. Hubby and I have 'discussed' this circumcision issue a couple of times now and it seems I still have a little bit of work to do as far as convincing him we are not going to get our DS done. At the moment the 'discussions/debates' get to a point where he just 'doesn't want to talk about it anymore' and it ends there. He keeps using the 'I want him to look like me' and 'it's cleaner' argument which are both totally ridiculous. I guess I know at the end of the day (or once our son arrives in 10 weeks) that we're not going to get him done as I am extremely against it and DH will not go against that cause he loves me and our DS. I think DH really sees being circumcised as being 'normal' because it is for him and i can understand that. DH is concerned about what he will say if our DS asks him why he looks different to daddy. I just told him we'll tell him that they did things differently when daddy was born.Insight on SBS is on this very subject this week, so he has agreed to watch it with me.
Last edited by Holly28; 30-09-2012 at 06:48.
Ask your DH if he knows if his Dad has been done or not. And if he doesnt know for sure then his argument that he wants his son to look like him is a moot point.
I understand why he says 'he doesnt want to discuss it anymore' as he doesnt have any valid points to back up his argument so its easier to shut it down then keep talking.
Its good that you guys are discussing it tho and hopefully with some more information he will change his mind.
For the record, DH is done and our two sons are not. Both of them have seen DP and they havent said anything. If it does come up then we will talk about about it.
The thing is they will compare themselves against their peers (school friends, etc) not their Dad as they will see their friends more when going to the toilet, swimming, etc. If anything they will want to be the same as their friends....not their Dad.
My highschool boyfriend was not done at a time when all other guys his age where. It was more important to him to look like his peers then his Dad and the girls at the time at school did not like uncircumcised guys as the only ever saw circumcised guys. I know he hated being so different to everyone else and I don't think he cared less that he was the same as his Dad!
men are so strange, I cant imagine having a daughter and thinking ' I want her vagina to look like mine'
When I was in high school (not all that long ago) the boys who were circumcised got made fun of by the boys who weren't. Just sayin.
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