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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by SimplyMum View Post
    No, I wouldn't marry that man.

    You would lock your phone (or anything for that matter) for one of 2 reasons;
    1. you have something to hide
    2. you can't trust the other person

    Both are very good reasons to NOT get married to that person.
    With all due respect, that statement is a generalisation. Yes I agree, the guy in question sounds like a scumbag and is locking his phone for the purposes you stated but my DH locks his phone also and doesn't want me going through it. I know the passcode but he has asked me not to go through his phone. At first I was angry but he then explained that this is the only thing that he feels is his. We share everything else together, including facebook and so he asked that I respect that his phone is his alone. He leaves his phone laying around and like I said I know his passcode but I wouldn't dare have a look because I trust him totally and completely. He has NEVER given me a reason to think he could be cheating but having said that, if he ever gave me a reason to be suspicious I'd be looking through it without even thinking twice about it.

  2. #22
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    Pfff I would never let a guy even if it was my husband go through my phone or my email. I keep people's confidences and speak to many people about private issues.
    If a man can't respect that then he isn't for me.
    I don't want to go through his things either. What's the point of having a partner if you treat them like a child.
    If you have no trust then you have nothing.
    Going through his phone isnt going to stop him from cheating anyway so it's pointless at best.

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  4. #23
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    He sounds like a winner...and rather manipulative and deceitful.

    DH's phone is locked, and I don't know his passwords to things...I respect that his privacy and trust that he is loyal...if I asked to borrow his phone and he declined, I would probably be a bit suspicious then, but I do think people deserve privacy within their marriage/relationship. I think demanding phones unlocked and passwords, etc, is quite controlling.

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    I agree - a single woman in the vicinity app? Why on earth would he need that?

    Quote Originally Posted by ciaomamma View Post
    But then again there's lots of couples we know who don't even share bank accounts... Which I find really weird!!
    My hubby and I don't share bank accounts, it's just not something we ever thought of doing. In saying that he's totally honest with what is in his account and what's coming out, so I've never thought to be suspicious as to why we haven't "merged". Too much hassle with the direct debits!

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    Dh has a lock on his phone as it's for work and is a special type of phone and he doesn't want the kids near it. I don't blink an eyelid. We also know each others pws to FB etc. I've never checked up on him, I think I accessed it once for a non-secretive reason.

    But the Op isn't talking about a straight up decent guy that has a lock on his phone to keep the kids out and some crazy untrusting wife. He is surfing p*rn and hiding it from her as she doesn't like it and has an app to hook up and talk to single women and admits he locks it too keep his fiance in the dark.

    There's a whole big space in between the two scenarios...

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  9. #26
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    No I wouldn't but then again I wouldn't marry anyone anyway

    Does he actually use the app though? I mean, I've got apps on my phone that I haven't used in years.

  10. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    No I wouldn't but then again I wouldn't marry anyone anyway

    Does he actually use the app though? I mean, I've got apps on my phone that I haven't used in years.
    DH and I have downloaded a few of those apps for a laugh...we live a pretty small town and spotted quite a few people we were familiar with....very amusing the read their profile/comments on themselves...

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    sounds like trust issues to me. For this reason i wouldnt marry him just yet.
    If i were his wife to be, i wouldnt care that he has his phone locked, alot of people do incase it gets stolen. I put a lock and password on mine if i go out to a function or whatever.
    I also wouldnt be nieve enough to have not gone thru his phone already lol
    In saying that, i dont actually go thru DH's phone because i couldnt care less.
    Last edited by Hunkamunka; 20-09-2012 at 14:32.

  12. #29
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    I think some people really dont take marriage seriously

    DH and I both have passcodes on our phones but it is the same passcode and we share all our passwords. I think your only secretive if you have something to hide.

  13. #30
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    The assumptions in this thread about married couples having passwords have something to hide is ridiculous.I'm glad I am secure enouh in my relationship to not need to know every single detail of my DH's life to be able to trust him.

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