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  1. #1
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    Default Starting to resent my son for not sleeping.

    I am at my wits end and struggling big time.

    My DS2 is 26 months old and he wakes up approx 6 times per night.

    The worst part is, it's not his fault. He has had a rough trot health wise and he struggles. He had severe silent reflux as a baby, he contracted RSV at 9 weeks and was hospitalised and ever since then, he spends more time sick than well. Hr catches EVERYTHING that is going around.

    But now I am resenting him because he won't let DH settle him. he screams for me. So I am getting less than 4 hours broken sleep a night lately. And I'm not coping at all.

    This is more a vent than anything. We've seen doctors upon doctors, he is medicated for asthma and on the list to have tonsils and adnoids removed. I know it will get better one day but it's getting really really hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel

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    SuperGranny is offline Worlds best grandma! Winner 2012 - Most Helpful Member
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    hi, sorry this is so hard for you. is there anyone or anyway you can manage to catch up on some sleep through the day? can you call a neighbour to just watch lo while you lie down for 30 minutes. ?? sleep is important for everyone, and you need to be able to rest. I wish I could help you, Marie.

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    Default Re: Starting to resent my son for not sleeping.

    Your life sounds like my life. Except dd is only 15 months. She caught hand foot and mouth at 3 weeks and was hospitalised, has had several bouts of croup, rsv, bronchiolitis, shigella (only mildly but was Still crap), chickenpox, six ear infections, tonsillitis, she has enlarged tonsils and adenoids, and has impaired hearing.. bla bla bla.
    She sleeps horribly. I actually just sleep with her every night, on a single mattress on the floor. Haven't had sex in months!! at one point I became really paranoid that there was something wrong with her immune system but I don't think there is.. she has developed her fathers unfortunate genes for ear, nose, throat issues, has an older sibling at kindy and she goes to daycare so brings home every virus known to man.
    Sorry for the long sob story. But I think we just have to remember that this will eventually pass. Take naps and offers of help when we can and not beat ourselves up for getting grumpy now and then..

    Gbh..its really hard. Plus I think this winter has been really bad for sickness..its ridiculous.
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    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    Given the impact this is having on you, have you considered getting outside help through a sleep consultant or going to a sleep centre?

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    Default Re: Starting to resent my son for not sleeping.

    Quote Originally Posted by SpecialPatrolGroup View Post
    Given the impact this is having on you, have you considered getting outside help through a sleep consultant or going to a sleep centre?
    My experience is that a baby who is always congested and/or has enlarged tonsils adenoids, causing sleep apnea, really can't be trained to sleep. Maybe as ops little one is a.bit older it would be possible

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    SpecialPatrolGroup's Avatar
    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    Default Re: Starting to resent my son for not sleeping.

    Quote Originally Posted by bumMum View Post
    My experience is that a baby who is always congested and/or has enlarged tonsils adenoids, causing sleep apnea, really can't be trained to sleep. Maybe as ops little one is a.bit older it would be possible

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    Fair point, I don't have experience with that kind of Adonis etc problem

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    Default Re: Starting to resent my son for not sleeping.

    Could you sleep with him? Maybe not every night if it's not something you want to do but it might give you the pick me up you need if you do it every now and then.

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    My DS wasn't as sick as yours but did have enlarged tonsils and adenoids and suffered sleep apnea from it. He didn't want me at night but DH so in the end DH either slept on a mattress on the floor or in the king single bed with DS. It wasn't ideal by any means but it did mean that we got more sleep than if we tried to get DS to sleep on his own. DH would lie on the floor when DS went to bed which normally was enough to get DS to sleep. He would then come to bed with me until DS woke in the night so we'd at least get some time in bed together before DH had to disappear into DS's room.

    It's terribly difficult and quite a strain but if that's what you have to do to get some sleep during this time of illness then it is what it is.

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    I am so sorry to hear that things are so tough. that sounds really exhausting. are you a sahm? Can you put him in daycare one day a week just to get a break? Sometimes we just have to take care of ourselves a bit so we can be a better mum, there is no shame in asking for help. I know when my dd has health issues, It's the emotional exhaustion that gets to you too.I don't really have much help to give but just wanted to say hang in there - you would like you're doing an amazing job


 

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