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  1. #21
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    Default Re: How/when could you/should you discipline someone else's child?

    I'll happily tell any kid who's being rough to quit it. I'll usually say something like 'hey! Let's stop fighting and start sharing, shall we?' Or if i think they're really doing it deliberately, I will sternly tell them 'gentle, thanks' and give them as big a greasy as I can muster LOL. There's a mum at my playgroup whose DD is a bully and DS is afraid of her, so i make sure she knows I know I'm watching. Her mum does try to pull her up on stuff, but she's not always watching as she has a baby as well.

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    I often slip into teacher mode and have no problem telling other children off if they are doing the wrong thing. However, if they are doing something that is naughty (but not dangerous) and their parent is in ear shot I sometimes do the "Well it's not very nice to throw sand, is it Zoe? Nobody will want to play with someone who throws sand" Loudly, directed at their parent, so i'm not confronting but getting my point across.

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    Default How/when could you/should you discipline someone else's child?

    I do. I always will. If other parents don't want me to then they should either adequately deal with their own children or keep them away from mine.

    You don't need to yell or anything, but if I am at the playground and a kid is about to push DD off something, I'm not going to stand there and watch it happen while hoping their parent will stop it. Instead I would say, "hey, pushing isn't nice. You should keep your hands to yourself."

    Same as if some kid whacks another. Mine or not, I'll tell them it's not on.

    I honestly couldn't care less if other parents think its okay for their child to be violent and not say anything to their child... I won't tolerate that crap and will pull them up for it if nobody else will.

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    If a child is hurting my child and the parents are doing nothing about it I would absolutely say something to the child. In a very firm voice.

    If a child did what that little did to you, and the mother said that. I would say "you don't hit people" (really firmly) and then I would tell the mother that it is completely unacceptable.

    If my child did that to someone I would be *mortified* and I would be apologising till the cows came home, and my child would lose every fun thing he loves and he would have to earn it all back with good behaviour!

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    What I hate more than anything, are those parents who do nothing when their kids are running riot and then get all huffy when someone says something to their kids. They get all offended and all like "don't talk to my child that way". Well - no one would have to talk to them if you kept an eye on them and told them not to do stuff in the first place.

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    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    If a child is hurting my child and the parents are doing nothing about it I would absolutely say something to the child. In a very firm voice.

    If a child did what that little did to you, and the mother said that. I would say "you don't hit people" (really firmly) and then I would tell the mother that it is completely unacceptable.

    If my child did that to someone I would be *mortified* and I would be apologising till the cows came home, and my child would lose every fun thing he loves and he would have to earn it all back with good behaviour!
    Thats my issue.....I too would be mortified and would be apologising over and over.

    But I just dont know how to tell another parent off so to speak. She is a lovely lady and her kids walk all over her. Its like she has given up? Dunno....but I just dont have it in myself to tell her that her kids behaviour sucks. A stranger I would have no issues with but someone i know....sigh....

    I do like the suggestions to speak to the kids (within ear shot of parents) in a clear calm voice so at least the parent can see whats happening so if it happens again I can go to the parent.

    Ugh just hate doing this!!!

  8. #27
    Bonkers is offline wishes she was a glow worm. A glow worm's never glum, 'cos how can you be grumpy when the sun shines out of your bum?
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    Default How/when could you/should you discipline someone else's child?

    I can't believe that child slapped you and the mother acted like that! Wtf????? If I see another child hurting or bullying my kids I speak up. I don't care about what the other parents say to it. I say hey stop that it's not nice. It annoys the bagebers out of me when parents do nothing to that behaviour an say things like oh she is just playing or just being rough. I imagine if it was the other way around the parent wouldn't like it.

  9. #28
    Bonkers is offline wishes she was a glow worm. A glow worm's never glum, 'cos how can you be grumpy when the sun shines out of your bum?
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    Default How/when could you/should you discipline someone else's child?

    The little smily face was meant to be a shocked look sorry guys

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    Quote Originally Posted by duckduckgoose View Post
    If one of DS' friends hurts him or he hurts one of his friends, my friends and I have no issue saying "hey xx, don't push zz", or "hey, xx was playing with that, give it back". Trying to hold a conversation/make a cup of coffee and keep a constant eye on your toddler is tricky and sometimes you're going to miss something. That's with my friends though.

    If it's a kid at playgroup I might say "that's not very nice" to the kid and move my child away, but I wouldn't actually tell them off.
    This^^

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    I can totally see how someone could just give up. I have felt it many times myself. What is the point, they don't listen anyway etc. And it would be really awkward to tell her what you are feeling. So if that is the case, then I would start pulling the little girl up on it. If the mother then says something to you, then at least she brought it up - you know what I mean?

    Quote Originally Posted by Michelle_N View Post
    Thats my issue.....I too would be mortified and would be apologising over and over.

    But I just dont know how to tell another parent off so to speak. She is a lovely lady and her kids walk all over her. Its like she has given up? Dunno....but I just dont have it in myself to tell her that her kids behaviour sucks. A stranger I would have no issues with but someone i know....sigh....

    I do like the suggestions to speak to the kids (within ear shot of parents) in a clear calm voice so at least the parent can see whats happening so if it happens again I can go to the parent.

    Ugh just hate doing this!!!


 

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