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  1. #11
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    Default Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    Im one of those suck it up and grin through it mums.
    The more times you put yourself through it the easier it gets though.

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    Default Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    So reassuring to hear of the heaps of mummies out there who have it too.
    I might have to start rehearsing some small talk I think, for such occasions. I am so sick of hating being around other parents at the school and at social events. Those of you who "suck it up" do you have any techniques you can share please?

  3. #13
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    Default Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    I adopt my brothers charisma and hope everyone else does the talking when I take my nephew to and from school lol.

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    Default Re: Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    Oh wow - can't believe there are so many of us!!! I have never been good at starting or carrying conversations and I never know what to ask to keep things moving along in case I sound like an idiot or offend anyone - and if total strangers try and strike up conversations I generally go blank and must look like a total grinning douche - most of the mums I hang out with now I meet on forums like this (this one mainly) so I was able to get a good base relationship with them before actually meeting them but usually public interaction terrifies me and to make matters worse I think I've missed some great friendships and occasions for both me and my kids simply because I couldn't face leaving the house

    sent from my happy place while I steal 5min for myself
    Last edited by My Three Angels; 08-09-2012 at 21:09.

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    Default Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    Wow, I really thought I was alone! It's so good to see other people feel the same, really reassuring. I felt so alone. I'm 30 weeks pregnant with my second son, 1st one is 4 and in kindy. I was so hoping that it would open the door for play dates etc but because I feel so awkward interacting with the other more chatty moms my little man misses out.

  6. #16
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    Default Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    I suck it up too. I try and interact with the other mums but sometimes it's so hard, I just don't talk for the sake of talking like some ppl so they probably think I'm strange. The couple of times I have put myself out there and thought I'd found some friends haven't worked out so well which makes me hang back all that more.

  7. #17
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    Default Re: Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    Quote Originally Posted by HarvestMoon View Post
    Thats what i hate. People always take me the wrong way. I get labelled 'rude' a lot but it's deffinetly not the case. Like you, i'm just shy and absolutely ****ting myself as well..lol

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using BubHub
    It's horrible isn't it!
    I am the same at DH's work functions too usually need a few glasses of dutch courage before we leave lol
    I just feel down about myself and have convinced myself everyone else feels/thinks the same

    Sent from my GT-I9000 using BubHub

  8. #18
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    Default Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    Quote Originally Posted by made2bAmummy View Post
    So reassuring to hear of the heaps of mummies out there who have it too.
    I might have to start rehearsing some small talk I think, for such occasions. I am so sick of hating being around other parents at the school and at social events. Those of you who "suck it up" do you have any techniques you can share please?
    I know I often give the wrong impression to strangers, as I'm not the just go up to any random and start a conversation type. Think i give off a rude or snobbish impression to those who dont know me. So on dh's advice (who is very much the social butterfly lol) I have tried when entering the room smiling and greet all the parents - so that they actually hear me, I've found it does actually make me seem less snob like lol and more approachable. Oh and a lot of deep breaths on your way there

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to sparklebug For This Useful Post:

    My Three Angels  (08-09-2012)

  10. #19
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    Default Anxiety over parent interaction means your lo's miss out on play dates?

    Quote Originally Posted by sparklebug View Post
    I know I often give the wrong impression to strangers, as I'm not the just go up to any random and start a conversation type. Think i give off a rude or snobbish impression to those who dont know me. So on dh's advice (who is very much the social butterfly lol) I have tried when entering the room smiling and greet all the parents - so that they actually hear me, I've found it does actually make me seem less snob like lol and more approachable. Oh and a lot of deep breaths on your way there
    That's great advice, will give it a go next time

  11. #20
    loop is offline Two kiddos keeping me on my toes :-)
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    hm, well I am a mum that really enjoys playgroup and chatting to other mums... but I still get anxious and wonder if I said something silly if I meet new people. We dont have family here, and the mums I have met have helped me so much I dont know what I'd do without them. And yeah, DS does really enjoy meeting people and hanging out with his buddies. But I am a crap mum at home, TV on lots and surely not enough quality play
    Anyway, I am not the best smalltalker really, I am better with the real deep stuff (IRL, not so much here, odd). So if I get stuck not knowing what to say, or there is someone new these are some things I ask about:
    - firstly smile and say hello
    - whats your childs name, how old, cute pretty, chatty ect
    - are you from here? No, how long have you been here (were from far far away lol)
    - siblings?
    - have you any holidays planned? where was your last one?
    - do you, did you will you, what is your work?
    - have you any pets?
    - talk about our last holiday
    - the usual babble about how your kiddies sleep, eat, poo ect...
    - weather

    It really is luck of the draw though whether you find a nice group of mums. If I didnt have a nice playgroup I'd prob go to toddler gyms, music and such more.
    Also, its sometimes easier to talk to other peoples kids if you are really more interested in socialisation for your own. DS is starting school next year, and I am actually quite excited about meeting the mums. We just moved to this area, so I will probably say something like how nice it is to meet local mums now, and do you know the school well, have you lived here long, where is your house and so such babble.

    Get out there girls, chances are the other mums are just as scared as you! My friends ALL think about conversations before, during and after, you are not the only ones.

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to loop For This Useful Post:

    lil82  (08-09-2012)


 

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