Just recieved a phone call from the acting deputy principle and am told the child has recieved a consequence....
To me that sounds like when my toddler doesnt put her toys away and i give her a small warning to lose a toy. Useless. And it sounded as thou they dodnt need anything else from me (like theres no need for me to come in)
And she said ive been told you have other concerns and i said yes i was wondering if i could just come in and talk to you at all today.
Today is all booked so i have to go in tomorrow after school. Were il try again to find out what the 'consequence' is.
Now i really like this deputy and my dds teacher was very outragged this morning at what happened & said to me how can she feel comfortable sending her yr1s on 'errands' or the toilet when she doesnt know if they will come back unhurt.
so i believe they have my dds best interest at heart but somewhere in the process this gets lost and the bully goes free.
Just like last time.
I do want to change schools, however we are moving at the end of year (a great distance away) so she would be changing schools regardless.
Im not sure if il be hurting her more by changing schools now and thrn starting another school in jan.
What do you think? Will that hurt her more or am i being reasonable in moving her now and then moving her again in jan?
She is an emotional child and does hang on to things - her fish died 3 yrs ago , which still upsets her.
I dont want to make the wrong choice and upset her. I need advice and someone to tell me what is the right choice??
Another option i have is to see if theres anyway to break my lease 5 months early without me having to fork out the rent till a new tenant comes in and just move now instead of in dec
(as i can not afford the massive rent i pay now plus rent and bond on a new house)
Im not sure what the police want me to wait for , i guess to see if it continues after today..?
I suppose my children not being able to play in their backyard due to a bully isnt their highest priority. Which i understand.
I just cant understand why an 8-9 yr old girl would verbally attack a 3yr old and then physically attack a 6 & 3 yr old because their not allowed to play with her at home and school.
But then she turns round and trys to befriend them (infront of me) and during school hours - they walk away and then few weeks later she randomly attacks them.
Its the same cycle over and over - overfriendly (in a creepy way) then silence, then attack, then silence, then acts creepy and friendly, then silence, then attack . And it goes on and on.
My kids are the world to me and i feel terrible even if they trip over and hurt themselves, i feel so sick knowing my dd is being hurt like this and doesnt understand why its happening.
I just want to lock them in the house with me and keep all the bad things away!
Again sorry if this is jumbled and all over the place, everythings just racing thru my mind and apparently i have no control
What a horrible situation. Your daughter is 6, why don't you ask her what she would like to do in regards to staying at the school she is at or changing schools for a short period of time.
I would not send my daughter to school until I could talk to the school about it. I would ring the school and just say that until you can be sure your daughter will be safe at school you won't be sending her.
As far as the bully goes, I'm going to guess she's either being taught this kind of stuff at home or she has a special need that prohibits her from understanding that it is not okay for her to behave this way. I would be finding out, and if she isn't a child with special needs I'd be contacting DOC's and expressing concerns for the child.
It's really not good enough for the school to not be jumping all over it. It's a great that you will move soon and not have to deal with it but that won't help her next victim and unless she gets help she will choose someone else to attack.
Sounds like a tough one I would seriously consider pulling her out and maybe home school for a few months before you Leave and let your girls play in the back yard while the bully is at school ...
I would be looking at home schooling for the few months till you move...if she is in Prep all you really need to be doing is working on drawing/writing/reading and making sure she knows her phonetics....easily done in 2 hours a day.
I would start recording in a dairy all the things with your neighbour...but, you are moving in a few months...so avoidance might be the best way to handle it.
Hang in there
Id be calling the school again and ask for an appointment as a matter of urgency as this is a serious incident, let them know you are taking the matter to the education department also.
Did you ask the police if a report can be made about this mornings incident?
Call the education department and make a report with them also and tell them you are not happy with how the school is handling the situation especially as its nit the first incident of physical violence against your child with the same offender.
It's really a sucky situation to be in. If you were moving a distance you could easily drive to I would pull her out and enroll her in the new school where you plan on moving to. But you said that's a fair distance away so maybe not an option.
I agree that pulling her out and starting at a new school only to move and start a new school isn't the ideal solution. Is pulling her out and then enrolling her in prep again at the new school you plan on moving to a solution?? I know it means repeating prep but you said she is a wee little thing so maybe she would fit in???
As others have said maybe home school would work?
Just trying to give some ideas that may work.
What are the parents of this child doing when this kid is bullying your girls at home?
You can always ask your real estate about breaking the lease they can only say no. Can't hurt to ask and if you explain the situation maybe they will let you?
I haven't heard the parents of the bully mentioned in this thread!?
Have they been spoken to? Are they aware what thei child is doing?
Hey thanks for all the replies. Il update as soon as possible, probably once both dd are asleep tonight.
Just making a few phone calls in regards to what happened and just picked up dd so want to focus on her.
But just to quickly answer one post - i assume the parents are inside - cant hear it- cause they have never come out.
But a teacher said something about having spoke to the childs supervisor...
Im not sure what excatly she means.
Anyway il update soon with more info!!
Sorry this post is quite long after detsils iv been given.
Thanks to anyone who gets to the end! And to the rest thankyou for trying!
Ok so no appt with school till tomorrow, however i ran into deputy on the way to pick up dd, she informed me she has called the lasy who supervisors her...
That had me confused as to what she ment... But after speaking with neighbourhood kids, it appears she has foster parents looking after her and her brother.....
But we are going to talk more about everything tomorrow at the appt. wether or not theyl tell me what the 'consequence' she was given is i dont know.
Also i found out more as to what happened. She came up to my dd as my toddler took to the toilet and repeatedly pushed my dd, then walked off.
Dd then continued to the toilet, just as she entered toilets the girl came after her again, my dd went inside toilets and told her stop go away and girl then pushed her a few times and then kicked very hard in the upper thigh just below her hip, while in the toilets.
Then yelled to my toddler - you want me to hit you to - and procceded to push my toddler in the stomach leaving a red mark.
My toddler wasnt herself all day and when waiting to pick dd up she needed to use toilet, as we spproached toilets she said to me - 'girls name' not push me no now' and i said no mummy is staying with you.
As we got to the toilet my 3yr old poked her head in and was looking around, she walked in and came to a wooden wall where she quickly poked her head around and then proceeded into the cubicle and again said 'girls name. No push me now'
At the time i had no idea why she was looking into the toilet before entering, it wasnt untill dd teacher informed me how much happened in the toilet.
This hurts so much knowing she was scared to go in even with me there.
Now i knew this girl has had incidents with other neighbour kids but didnt know the extent.
But have now found out that its been physical and verbal and she has also said sexual things to them just like she did to both my dd in past incidents.
Things including private parts, and just inappropraite things, and then f u, ur a B. s. c. All the words you can think of.
She has also told people that her dad is gay and sucks doodles and is with a women that has a doodle.
Now i dont know if she is lying or not (i question it because i couldnt imagine any 8/9 yr old saying 'women who has a doodle' without having something trigger it)
But at the same time she does lie atlot and tried to convince people her name is xyz and not xxx.
It would seem to me that even thou she seems like a normal 8/9 yr old, mayby home life is bad for her.
However.. My dd are 6 and 3 and just dont get why someone would hurt them.
Why someone would corner them in a toilet and attack them.
Why someone would sneak up on them and attack infront of a lunch time crowd.
Why someone who use such foul words.
And the list goes on!!
My dd leg is still in pain tonight and been given panadol. But my 3yr olds tummy appears to not be bothering her.
Shes confused right now and is unsure if she wants a new school, as she wants to leave but shes just made a new friend in past weeks that has been such an amazing friend.
Unfortunetely i cant send her to the school she will attend next year as its a 2hr drive. So after tomorrows school meeting i will decide the best action in regards to a school change.
Dd teacher set her up with a group of friends that was actually being supervised, however they let her go to the toilet alone and walked back to class and didnt wait for her, which caused worry for the teacher when it was taking a while to return.
But return safely in the end.
Second break the girl approached my dd, dd went to walk away but the girl ran up to her said sorry, gave her 10cents and walked off. But apparently muttered **** off as she walked away.
Dd also has been told if she sees this girl at lunch time no matter how far away she is, she has to run to a teacher and say that girl hurts me and i need to stay with you till im safe.
I dont feel good or safe with dd there and the only way to stop that is the girl to be expelled or kept under tight supervision from the minute shes enters school grounds- till the minute she leaves.
I understand that theres a big possibility that her home life isnt the greatest BUT, how many kids does she need to abuse before shes taken out of school or supervised.
Her life isnt great but that doesnt mean she should be given chance sfter chance to interfere with my dd or any other childs life and in the rnd causing difficulty getting these kids to school as they fear her!!
Last edited by Bubbygirl; 05-09-2012 at 19:13.
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